Barbara's NDE 3059

EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:

            I had fallen and broken my hip.  I was in surgery to have it repaired.  During the surgery I went into respiratory failure.  I remember being in a darkness without boundaries and I was not in a body.  It was as if the essence or spirit of me was there.  I was floating as if in water but there was no water, just a darkness.  I was calm and peaceful and warm and it felt as though I should be there.  I don't know how I knew but I was waiting.  I did not questions this, I just knew I was there and it was ok.  There was no sound, no feeling, no pain.  And it was completely good.  But I was unable to advance to the next part of the experience.  Then I was in in the ICN and back in my body, but still floating.  As if my body was a shell and I was disconnected from it.  I was aware of everything around me, doctors and nurses coming and going but outwardly I was still unconscious.  I could hear all the sounds and I could think.  I was aware of everything and understood everything and was completely calm and clear in my mind.  It was almost matter-of-fact.  I was aware of the respiratory breathing for me, my hands were restrained, I knew when the doctors were drawing blood from me.  I felt no pain, no emotion.  This state came and went as I went deeper into darkness for two days.  Then I came back and reattached to my body and woke up.  They removed me from the respirator after allowing me to breath on my own for a while.  I remember waking up for this.  After they took me off the respirator, I did not have any more experiences.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes     It is as if I do not possess the words to adequately describe the experience.  No matter what words I use they do not seem to convey exactly what was happening.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes            Respiratory Failure during surgery.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    when I had stopped breathing in the operating room.  It was as if I understood everything and had no more questions about anything.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:            when I had stopped breathing in the operating room.  It was as if I understood everything and had no more questions about anything.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Yes     There was a clarity and yet there was no need for vision in the physical sense.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
            Yes     In the operating room there was no sound.  In ICU I was aware of even the smallest sound

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            not really emotions but a sense of calm and peacefulness that I have never experienced before.   As if I had achieved my true self

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          No      

Did you see a light?           No      

Did you meet or see any other beings?           No      

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?    No      

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Yes     I asked the doctors and nurses about things they had said to me while I was unconscious or that they had said to each other while I was unconscious

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?           Yes            I would say that the vast void of darkness was another dimension.  Even though it was darkness it wasn't oppressive or frightening.  It was quite pleasant.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes     There was no time dimension to me during this experience.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     Yes     I sensed that I understood for the first time.  I am not sure exactly what I understood but there was a sense of understanding within me.  As if I was in the right place at the right time and all was well.  That I was where I was supposed to be.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No      

Did you become aware of future events?       No           

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?     Uncertain      I feel different as a result of this experience.  A calmness, less fearful than I used to be.

Have you shared this experience with others?         No      

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?    Yes     I have hear of people seeing a bright light in NDE's but I did not experience that.  This was totally different from anything I had ever heard.

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:            Experience was definitely real    These memories came back a little at a time to me.  It took some time for it to become clear in my mind.  As it did, I felt calmer and more peaceful.  It has given me some answers that I had always questioned about death.  I am no longer fearful of death and know I believe there is something after life.  It is not to be feared but to be embraced when the time is right.  I believe the reason I was floating and waiting to move on is that it was not my time to die.

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?    the whole thing was significant to me.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:            Experience was definitely real   

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           Yes     I embrace life differently now.  I am less fearful and uncertain of myself.  Because I know there is something wonderful afterwards, there is no reason to be afraid now.

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?            Yes            I believe in something greater than myself, and a passing to something else.  I believe in the essence of a person, their spirit or soul passing to another plane of existence.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No      

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?        It was a truly wonderful experience.  The only time in my entire life I felt totally calm, peaceful and belonging.

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         Yes