Pepi's NDE

Experience:

Dear NDERF--

A friend of mine who lives in Spain has, for the past few years, been caring for her father who is in poor health and not expected to live too much longer.  I recently sent her a copy of Life After Life without telling her I was going to send it.  She wrote back and said she already read the book.  She bought it when it was first published because she, too, had an NDE and she wanted to find out more about her experience.  I asked her if she would write it up and send it to me.  I also sent her the follow-up questions I found on your site, but I modified and changed some of them to better fit her experience.

If you feel this experience will be of value to others and to your research, she wants you to publish it on your site.  Her name is Pepa.

Sincerely,

Rio

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Pepi's Story:

My NDE took place when I was 20 years old, in October of 1975.  I am currently a 45 year-old woman, and I teach English as a foreign language at a high school in Spain. I am Spanish and I studied English Philology at University for five years, between 1972-1977.

My NDE happened during a surgical operation to remove a lump in my breast.  I remember suddenly opening my eyes and all was dark, except for a narrow path, wide enough for me to walk comfortably.  It was like being in outer space, everything around was in silence, the whole cosmos was around me but I was not afraid or feeling bad at all. I felt full of hope, energetic, alive.  As if all my dreams were coming true.  All at once.

The path I was walking on was very, very bright, and I could see the end of it almost from the very beginning. Someone was waiting for me where the path ended. I knew it was Jesus. He was tall and strong, with long dark hair and a wonderful tender smile. His eyes were unforgettable, immense, dark, so loving and full of wisdom... He was wearing a long white tunic, and sandals. He was there all by himself and smiling, just waiting for ME.  He welcomed me.  He didn't say a word, I didn't either, but we were communicating without talking. Our minds were very close and after a second we were inside what seemed to be a spaceship. I didn't see it from the outside, just from inside.  It was a room full of lights and several men were sitting at their posts getting the controls ready to take off. Jesus introduced all of them to me. "She is our new passenger, our guest" (no words), and they all greeted me, (no words), just smiling, in the middle of their routine work with the controls of the spaceship. Their clothes were very different from that of Jesus. They were dressed in astronaut's clothes, light and bright too, but very sophisticated, futuristic, far from the way Jesus was dressed.

Then, suddenly, when I was getting comfortable and ready to stay there, he took me out again. "You must go back", he said (no words), and his smile has since then accompanied me throughout my life. I did not balk at what he said.  I just obeyed, unquestioningly.   He was my friend and my boss, no doubt about that.

We didn't have to walk or move in order to enter or leave the ship.  We only had to want to do it and it was done.  Our minds controlled everything.  And so I left as he had said and returned to my body and to this life.

I woke up, and cried... calling a friend's name for a while. Maybe I subconsciously knew that my friend would be the only one who would understand what had happened to me.

  *Was your experience difficult to express in words? 

     If yes, What was it about the experience that makes it hard to communicate?

I don't think so, but, anyway, I never really tried very hard to tell anybody, as nobody was really interested in knowing about it. Most people I know, including most of my friends, don't believe in life after death, or even God for that matter. My friend whose name I called was the first person I really tried hard to remember the experience for because I knew he cared and wanted to know and took it seriously.

  *What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?

    Was the experience dream like in any way?

It is even more real than normal, earth reality.   Everything was very bright and soothing. I can still see clearly everything that I experienced there. When I have a dream, once I am awake again, colors fade away and little by little images disappear. This is not the case with my NDE.  The path is still shining bright in my memory, Jesus' face, his smile, his proximity, the people in the room, everything is intact as if it were happening to me again.

  *Was there any medical evidence of cessation of breathing or heart function?

No, they gave me something to put me to sleep. The operation was supposed to last one or one and a half hours but it lasted more than four. My parents never asked why. (I have always known that I probably had a "cardiac arrest,"  my heart stopped beating and they had to work on me for some time in order to revive me. I KNOW THAT, but I don't know why I know it.

  *You said you experienced a separation of your consciousness from your body.

    Can you describe your appearance or form apart from your body.

No, I just saw myself walking on the path, never in the surgery room or anything like that, and my appearance was always the same as my body.

  *What emotions did you feel during your NDE?  

Similar, in a way, to the ones I felt when I once traveled to the USA. Happiness, excitement, confidence, hope, all positive and peaceful.

  *Please include your feelings, if relevant, to events you describe in your answers to the following questions:

  *Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?

No, not that I can remember.

  *Did you see a light?     If yes, describe.

The path was very bright, nothing here can be compared to it, it didn't hurt my eyes at all but it was so bright, a mixture of yellow and white, like a sun ray, through which I was walking. Everything around was dark and silent.

  *Other than Jesus, did you know any of the people you saw? 

    What was communicated to them or from them?

No, I didn't know anybody in the spaceship. They were all strangers to me. They were told of my presence by Jesus and they all said hello, without speaking, BUT in a routine sort of way, as if they did that all the time.  They just greeted me and continued with their work at the control knobs, getting the ship ready to leave.

  *Did you experience a review of past events in your life? 

No. 

  *During the NDE did you learn anything you did not previously know?

Well, I learned that even someone like me, unimportant and unknown, small and full of imperfections, was loved by God to such an extent that he sent Jesus to welcome me.  So, human parameters and God's are very different and therefore, we are not seen with human eyes, but with the mind's eyes, the soul's eyes, the heart's eyes.

  *Did you learn anything that helps you live your life now?

Yes, It was a proof to me that this life is just a "rehearsal" for the one to follow, so the more I try to "act" well, the better the performance will be later on. It encourages me to overcome difficulties, to be honest, caring, love peace and justice and work for it, even knowing that I am not an "avant guard" person, unfortunately.

  *Were you given an understanding of what your life mission was?

Not really. I was given proof that I will live forever, that I will continue having opportunities later on, after I die, when I will be free from my body.  It was a message of hope to me personally, unless I wanted to tell of my experience to anybody who would want to hear it. Jesus didn't say, "You go and tell this, etc."  No.

  *Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events occurring while you were unconscious that could be verified later?  

No.

    *Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?  

Yes, I was in outer space, as if passing from Earth to another dimension, BUT everything was dark, no stars, not that I can remember. But it was nice, hopeful, pure beauty, in all that silence and peace while I was walking down the path and Jesus was waiting at the end of it.

  *Did you have any sense of altered space or time?

Everything was logical to me, nothing was surprising or shocking.

  *Did you have a sense of knowing universal order and/or purpose?

    If yes, discuss and share what you came to know.

I had the feeling that at the end of the path I was walking on, life goes on, new opportunities will come, the wish to learn and love better will be open forever. That was the universal order I received from my experience. Nobody told me but I learned it there. I am a very intuitive person in daily life, so imagine how it would be during such an experience.

  *Did you become aware of future events in your life?  

Not then.

    *What were your emotions when you learned you would be coming back to this life?

I felt sad because I cried a lot.

  *Did you have any psychic or paranormal gifts following the NDE you did not have prior to the NDE?

I have always had a sixth sense, in knowing how people feel.  I can read their minds sometimes, I can feel their fears, insecurities, their bad side.   I sense when people are afraid or are suffering in some way, even if they don't say anything.  I still have not learned how to help them.  At times I will try because I feel such love for them, but I don't follow any formula for helping them.  I can only follow what my heart tells me but sometimes I cannot help them.  It's as if their wave length and mine just can't connect.

  *Have you shared your NDE with many others? 

No, only the close ones, and then I hid it deep in my heart.  People don't believe in that, so we never talk about it. Or they say that this experience belongs to an unknown world and they don't know how to deal with it.

    Were they influenced in any way by your NDE?

Well, if anything, they took me even less seriously than before thinking that I was talking nonsense.

    *What emotions did you experience following your NDE?

I didn't think much about it consciously. I knew it was a great gift I had received and as I usually do with gifts, I try not to spend much time thinking about it, because it keeps me from my work.

  *What was the best and worst part of your NDE?

All was good while it lasted. The whole experience.  Remember that Jesus was with me all the time, so everything that happened was great.  And it lasted for such a short time...

  *Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the NDE?