5/17/11 edited for clarity by Judy Shea
EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:
I was in the hospital for out-patient surgery on my toe. I was (am) in good
health and no problems were anticipated.
During my recovery, when the breathing tube was removed, I was not able to
breathe. When I had woken up, the recovery nurse was very close to my ear,
telling me to breathe. I tried to tell her that I couldn't breathe, but no sound
came out. She kept telling me to breathe and I kept trying to tell her that
breathing was not possible.
In my head, I started yelling at the nurse, telling her that if I COULD breathe,
I WOULD and STOP telling me to breathe. Then it occurred to me that I was going
to die, and I thought, "This can't be happening. I'm not ready, and my daughter
is waiting in recovery. I can't die over a silly little toe procedure." It
struck me as ironic, and at the same time aggravating, that this was happening
to me, and that these people seemed like a bunch of idiots - especially the
nurse who was getting on my nerves with her insistence that I breathe. Why
couldn't she tell that I was struggling to breathe, but it just wasn't working?
Soon after, my legs started shaking and then my whole body. I wondered why my
body was bouncing around, but it didn't hurt and it was a pleasant distraction.
Suddenly I was aware that I was looking down on my body - but I could also feel.
I saw it (my body) bouncing, and it felt like I was on a washing machine and
that something else was bouncing me around. So, now I'm somewhere around the
ceiling looking down at my body on the table. That was when I noticed all the
people in the room. They were doing things quickly, crowding around me and the
table I was on. A guy went to the speaker on the wall and said "Code red!" and
then called for my chest x-rays. From my place near the ceiling, I answered
him. I told him that they didn't have my chest x-rays, because they hadn't
taken any. But he did not appear to hear me. After that, everything went
black. I woke up while being transferred to a hospital room, and I was back in
my body again. I had a breathing tube in my nose, and a nurse gave me this
breathing thing that I had to blow into every so-many minutes. They kept me
there the remainder of the day and night, but released me once the machine
said that my respiration was high enough.
I've told my story to my family and to anyone else who is interested. I've told
them that if they are in a situation where they cannot breathe, the best thing
to do is to try not to struggle and to just let go. Once you let go, it's easy.
No pain or bad feelings. I use to fear drowning, always assuming it was the
worst way to die. I know now that it is not. Death is not scary. it's not even
painful at all. Everything feels good and right once you let it happen.
Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?
No
At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?
Yes
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of
consciousness and alertness?
When I floated to the ceiling and watched what was going on.
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience
compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?
Normal consciousness and alertness.
When I floated to the ceiling and watched what was going on.
Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any
aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception
degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?
No
Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any
aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness,
etc.)?
No
Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?
Yes
What emotions did you feel during the experience?
First I felt panic, then irritation, then giddiness, and then intense
interest in what was happening to my body. Concern for my children was always
there.
Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?
No
Did you see a light?
No
Did you meet or see any other beings?
No
Did you experience a review of past events in your life?
No
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your
experience that could be verified later?
No
Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or
dimensions?
No
Did you have any sense of altered space or time?
Yes
Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or
purpose?
No
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?
Yes. The ceiling - I never left the ceiling.
Did you become aware of future events?
No
Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the
experience you did not have prior to the experience?
No
Have you shared this experience with others?
Yes. As soon as I woke up in my hospital room, I told my daughter what
happened.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your
experience?
Yes. I had read about NDEs before, but had no firm beliefs either
way.
How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it
happened:
Experience was definitely real I viewed it as an opportunity to learn that
death is not painful, and that drowning, or not being able to breathe, is not
as bad as it sounds.
Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or
significant to you?
The calmness I felt after I let go and let it happen.
How do you currently view the reality of your experience:
Experience was definitely real.
Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your
experience?
No
Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your
experience?
No
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life,
medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?
No
Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and
comprehensively describe your experience?
Yes
