Oliver V NDE

EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:

At 11 years old, I was rushed to the ICU after a serious septicemia, result of a bad diagnosis made by a general doctor. He told my parents I had a acute gastroenteritis, while it was actually a serious case of colon vovulu. My parents trusted him and I stay about 24 hours without treatment until my mother insisted for me to be sent to the hospital, because I fainted several time.  

I have no memory of the trip to the hospital. The last thing I remember is my driving with high speed to the hospital. Then I remember all the surgery instruments aligned on a white sheet and the doctors around me in the ICU. I don't know if I was awake or not at that point.

That's where my memory of what happened at he hospital stopped. I suddenly felt propelled at a very high speed in a black tunnel, darker than black itself. This experience is hard to explain even though my memory of it is as vivid as if I had lived the experience this morning. I did not see any wall to the tunnel which seems contradicting as I was aware of being in spiral like wormhole. I could see in the distance a tiny point of light that grew quickly into a glowing disc or orb, which was emanating an incredible milky white color, and yet very brilliant at the same time, without hurting the eye. It was emanating an indescribable reassuring calm. All my pain was gone and my only desire was to reach the light. When I reached it, I was suddenly propelled in a incredible speed towards it and then suddenly, I was completely stopped in a very sudden way. 

I suddenly found myself floating in a place without tangible limits, indescribable, immaculate and saturated with the essence of this absolute light, made of immeasurable Love  and therefore it is hard to explain the dimension of the experience with human words. I was a observer without a physical body, bathed in pure elation in the midst of this Love so deep that all memories faded, in this misty space and luminous space without border. I felt completely transcended by this immense amnesic Love  and thought i would just stay in this unknown place, but which somehow felt familiar too, even more familiar than my home on earth. I wanted to proceed further but I was not allowed. A voice that seemed like a telepathic conscience coming simultaneously from me and from the Light told me to go back. " It is not your time yet" I responded "I don't want to go back, please let me stay here, I am not hurting here, I feel happy" - But the instruction was reiterated, a little firmer and was coming from this omnipresent and universal vocal wave. I was then sucked back into my body.

I remember getting back into my body was extremely painful. I woke up with no notion if what happened to me had lasted 1 hour or 1 day. I was covered with tubes, and other tools in the ICU. I saw my parents behind the window and my mother was crying in my dad's arms. I then felt a tremendous sadness to be in this cold ICU room, in the middle of all this medical equipment. Everything seemed so superficial with little meaning, compared to my journey!

Outside, the doctor and anesthetist, cover with blood from head to toe, told my parents that I would not have made it if I had arrive an hour later. 

This is my testimony. I told you the whole story without trying to add anything, just the reality of the story the way I experienced it.

I WOULD LIKE TO HIGHTLIGHT THAT I AM USUALLY A VERY SKEPTICAL PERSON, but I have not gone one week without thinking of this experience and questioning myself on its nature. This experience has completely changed my life.

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?   Yes, in ICU

Was the experience difficult to express in words?  Yes    I can't find the right words in the human language that could describe accurately the extend of what I have experienced

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    in the luminous Space

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness?      More consciousness and alertness than normal   I could possibly not remember a random dream with every single details with such a vivid memory, It was not a dream in the human sense of it.

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   Before the experience I was aware of the medical instruments and the doctors around my body, but I don't remember being awake before the surgery. I did not pay so much attention after the experience as I was only 9 years old.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   no change

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?   Uncertain   I saw medical tools and doctors around me but I am not sure at what moment I regain consciousness.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?  LOVE - PEACE - HAPPINESS - WELL BEING

Did you pass into or through a tunnel?   Yes   Tunnel a black tunnel, darker than black and felt I was moving at high speed - a glowing disc or orb, which was emanating an incredible milky white color and yet very brilliant at the same time, without hurting the eye. It was emanating an indescribable reassuring calm.

Did you see an unearthly light?   Yes  - A misty light which was extraordinary alive and penetrating, and soft- It was not hurting the eye, and was emanating a above-human Love.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice?   I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin - A telepathically omnipresent voice, in the sense that it was resonating from everywhere, non human. It was internal and external, like a voice wave

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)?   No  

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?   No  

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?   No  

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?   Some unfamiliar and strange place
I don't see that place as a supernatural place as it was actually more like the place where we naturally come from and where we will go back'

It was a strange place but which did not seem unfamiliar - I don't have the right word to describe it.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down?   Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning

There was no temporal reality, just impression of high speed and being sucked into a tunnel and a sudden eternal immobility in this illuminated space.

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?   No
I never thought of that.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?   Uncertain
I was asked to come back

Did you come to a border or point of no return?   I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was "sent back" against my will

Did scenes from the future come to you?  No 

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly life (“life after death”)?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime?   Uncertain   - I know I existed in that place but the voice explained to me that I had to go back, I implicitly understood (or was made aware of) that I existed before coming to that place. If I had not, I would have stayed there in an amnesic happiness state.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not) exist?   Yes  The uniqueness of the Light, essence of all Love, omnipotent and omnipresent

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s meaning or purpose?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding love?   Uncertain  - I would not boast to know the full understanding of this immense emotion I felt and can only be compared to the word Love we use.

During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information / awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living our earthly lives?   No  

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?   No  

What occurred during your experience included:   Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs I had at the time of your experience - As a child and raised by atheist parents, I was not going to the  catechism (at that time) - I did not have any preconceived patter. I had heard of religion but was not interested in it and I had no idea of any paradise or  other.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience?   I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience  - It happened 20 years ago and it feels like yesterday - I forgot many important moments of my life but this one is carved in my memory forever.

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience:   Since my experience, I am in constant quest, I want to know what I experienced and if it was a prelude to death and what death is. I saw and experienced something but my intellectual mind resists and i am living this duality between believe in a life after death, and the earthly reality of a scientific explanation of the state of death itself.

My experience directly resulted in:   Large changes in my life

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?   Uncertain  - I have always been very respectful of life, nature and the world that surround us. But since that experience, I feel I need to live the most respectful life possible, but I have a hard time accepting bad behavior of others  

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you?   The whole experience is a whole that cannot be divided. It is the experience of my life and cant be translated with limited words meanings.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience?   No  

Have you ever shared this experience with others?   Uncertain  - Not immediately. I remember sharing it with my mother who did not take the story of a child seriously. Later on, when I heard that other people had similar experiences, I told the story to my sister who because very interested in the topic. But in general, I have buried the experience and even my mother does not remember me telling her about my experience. .

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?   No  

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:   Experience was probably real   - I said probably because I buried the experience deep in me, without ever forgetting it. I was only 11 and did not have the reasoning of an adult.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:   Experience was definitely real  as there are many testimonies I read about from individuals and scientists 
Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?   No  

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?   Uncertain   - I am an atheist but I am doubting now and I remain open to any possibility!

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience?   Uncertain   I once had the impression to leave my body and enter my sister's room - but the difference is that in that case, I can't tell if it was a dream or not. My NDE experience was definitely not a dream . It was a real experience, I am totally convinced of it.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience?   Non

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?   Uncertain   I don't have the right words to explain with accuracy the experience !

Please offer any suggestions that you may have to improve this questionnaire.  Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience?     It would be interesting to have a glossary with the extra - ordinary words to use to explain the experience, and help people express the emotions felt during the NDE. It would help you,  provided a more accurate testimony. But then, it is provided these words exist. I personally don't know any that would describe specific emotions.