Lorraine J NDE
I was five years old. It began like a normal illness, with stomach pains and flu symptoms. But then my fever spiked. My mother called an ambulance. When they put me in I was really scared. Several months prior my great-grandmother had died and I associated ambulances with death. They had to calm me down because I was practically hysterical. So my mother decided to ride with me in the ambulance so that I would calm down. I was very weak. Then it happened, halfway to the hospital. I left my body and the ambulance behind. I thought I would fall and hurt myself so I put my arm out to shield my body from the fall. But I remained standing in the air. I turned around and saw the ambulance going off without me. I asked myself what was happening. How could I get out of here?
I came to an intersection and saw my father still behind the wheel of his car. He was headed towards the hospital. I tried to make him notice me but he didn't and just kept driving. Why didn't he see me? He wouldn't leave me here alone. So now I was really all alone in some kind of place that I didn't really recognize. I wanted to go home. Grandmother was at home. So I decided to head over that way. I got there really fast. But I made a mistake and landed in a grocery store. Inside was my uncle. I went over to him but he didn't see me. Why not? I was at a loss. I followed him outside. To my surprise I went through the glass door without opening it. I didn't understand that either. I was so confused. My aunt was waiting for my uncle in the car. They talked a little bit but neither one of them noticed me. I sat in the car so that I could ride with them since they lived right next door to me. Once home, and it was the home of my grandparents, I saw that my grandmother did not notice me. Slowly I began to understand. I stood by the front door and it became clear that I had died.
It was an unusual feeling. I tried to fly and I could! I flew over the neighborhood houses and felt light and full of joy that I could do so. I could still feel. I thought about my mother and father and felt sadness. They were both very sad. I landed in a schoolyard. I wanted to find out what kind of world I was in since I couldn't leave it. I went into a small gym. Inside were students and a teacher. They were playing some kind of sport. Maybe soccer or hockey, I don't know which exactly. I realized suddenly that I was rising. I thought I would reach heaven so I looked down to say goodbye to the students - they had their whole lives ahead of them to live and they didn't even know that I could see them.
Above me was a small black opening. It swallowed me up. I was flying through a tunnel very very fast but it felt weird. I heard a noise, like a wind sound. It was all so crazy! The tunnel was black, pitch-black. Then it got light again. At the end of the tunnel was a light. The walls of the tunnel kept moving away from one another. It felt like I was in a cave with smooth walls. It seemed very big and damp. I didn't know what I was doing here and it seemed as though a long time had passed. This place seemed familiar but I couldn't put my finger on it. I waited in the middle of the tunnel or cave. The light emanated warmth, love and happiness. It was a living light. I heard beautiful music. So I went directly into the light. Once inside it felt as though I was home again. Everything was white and full of love. I was secure here.
Shortly thereafter I landed in a large world with many beings and brilliant blue sky. In the middle was a road. I was really wowed! It was beautiful, so lush. Along the road were stones that had colors I had never seen before. And suddenly my great-grandmother was before me. She told me it was my decision to stay or to return to earth. She said it would be better if I returned. Great-grandmother seemed much wiser here than when she was alive on earth. She also emanated a lot of warmth. I told her I wanted to see just a little more here. I was curious. So I went walking. But then I thought about my mother and father. No, I didn't want to stay any longer. I decided that next time I would see this world because I knew that one day I would be returning.
I went back, back into the light which now spoke to me. It was a telepathic communication. The light showed me pictures of the future. Nice things, like one day I would get married. It showed me my future husband. I didn't know him at that moment. He was going to be very sick but would make it. I heard that it was a mycotic infection in the lungs. I didn't understand those words. I thought he would die and started to feel very unhappy. The light kept telling me that he would live through his illness. I saw doctors, nuns and nurses - whom I would meet years later. In addition I was going to forget all the details of this NDE. I would only remember much later. I heard the light say everything would be alright. I said goodbye to the light and went back to the darkness. It took a while for me to return to the ambulance. I saw my body lying on the stretcher and went back into it. When I woke up I vaguely remembered a light and darkness. At the hospital they examined me and a nun asked me where I had been, because of the light and the darkness. She thought I had dreamt it. But that didn't convince me. I didn't speak anymore about the experience and forgot about it for a few years. Then I remembered it all years later.
Everything happened the way the light had shown me it would. And it really was really alright.
Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes
To write how
At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? Yes cardiac arrest
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? The whole time.
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal
If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain: The whole time.
Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)? Uncertain I can't really describe it. Everything was so intense.
Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)? Yes It was as if I could hear better than on earth.
Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?
What emotions did you feel during the experience? confused, afraid but also relieved and happy. The feelings changed with each situation.
Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?
Yes see description above
Did you see a light? Yes see description above
Did you meet or see any other beings? Yes I met my great-grandmother. see description above
Did you experience a review of past events in your life? No
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? Yes
My father was at that intersection waiting for the light to change. I recognized the teacher from the gym a year later.
Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or
dimensions? Yes see description above
Did you have any sense of altered space or time? Yes
There time seems to go by slowly while here it's only a couple of minutes. It felt like I was gone a long time, or else that time didn't even exist.
Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? Yes
I knew that
we all come from that other world and will return to it.
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain
made the decision on my own to return.
Did you become aware of future events? Yes
see description above
Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience? Uncertain
I can sense
other people's moods very clearly. I know immediately what kind of character
they have. I can also sense people's feelings of sympathy or hostility towards
Have you shared this experience with others? Yes
later. The reactions were positive.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened: Experience was definitely real
was very real. It really happened.
Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes the light and my husband. When he was so sick I had this constant feeling of having lived this already. I couldn't figure it out. I knew it would all turn out well but still felt very afraid. It's good that the light showed me this event otherwise I would have felt even more fear and anxiety.
How do you currently view the reality of your experience: Experience was definitely real
was real. A dream doesn't feel the same.
Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience? No
Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience? No
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience? Yes, there is life after death.
Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Uncertain
I don't know if I understood the questions well.