Diane C's NDE
This was awesome! I was cold, frightened and then suddenly halfway from Glendale to Burbank, I simply felt like an armor had been unlocked and my real body had been released. I felt warm, love, peace and pure joy in that birth. I looked at myself for only a moment, and at my husband frantically driving to the hospital. At that same moment, I began to multi-locate and was with my mother who was driving to Glendale for my son, Larry. I was with my doctor driving to the hospital [interesting that I also stayed all the time with him when I arrived at St. Joe's but also experienced Heaven and what I'll describe. I could tell the Doctor everything he did during my arrival there to the minute details of accompanying the nurse to the basement of the hospital to get the plasma for me; to the oxygen in the elevator wall he was giving me while during CPR, everything he did and they did while also in Heaven being instructed and shown around.
At the same time I was with both my mother and doctor and husband, I was also with my sister, Nannette at the LA Stock Exchange, with my sister, Charonne at College and my brother, Raymond at high school. I multi-located, knew their thoughts and what each was doing and related it to each of them. I was also with my son, Larry who was being cared for by Mary. I was vividly aware of each and everyone of them.
At the same time, it was as if I were in an invisible plane hovering over the San Fernando Valley and seeing the beauty of it all. At the same time, I was also looking down on earth from space and seeing how awesome earth looked from space. I went through the universe, understanding within me that this was a place I knew and suddenly I was on a real, living firmament. A living place of pure love. The waters were living waters, the grass was living, the trees were living, the animals were living, more alive than earth is.
My 'guide' is actually an angel, with a solid body of light, in the same form and design as our earthly body is, but solid light. Words are really inadequate to describe Heaven as it is fantastic. I KNEW I was HOME. I knew this was where I'd come from to earth. In those seven minutes of death on earth, I experienced 7 weeks of time or more. Who knows?
I first came to an absolutely serene and beautiful countryside. This is where I saw animals [including unicorns] and they were so beautiful and contented, so full of LOVE. The grass and trees and flowers were all so exquisite that my mind said so, and in return a vibration of Love flowed back to me from them. The water was so spectacular that I expressed this in my mind and the waters were living and sparkled back to me with love.
There was melody or music all around, not unexpected and perhaps because I love music so much. And God has permitted me several times in this life to hear this awesome music, fully more melodic and more beautiful than anyone could write while here on earth. Just suddenly playing and filling my soul with joy.
I was taken by this angel to a place like a coastal community, where I flew above it without wings or plane and it was colorful, alive and so beautiful. And then he [I was aware this angel was male] took me to a place where there was a computer.
Now you can image how difficult in 1958 it was to describe after I came back what I now have words to describe. So, I will give you both what I saw and then how I tried to explain what I saw. He showed me God's computer! You got that! Heaven has a computer we will never catch up with on earth. And the angel and I were discussing my choice to enter earth in 1936 versus the other choice I'd debated, or that of the Civil War period. So, he went over to a wall area [this room was white and very clean and orderly] and took a tiny case, which I now know is what we call a jewel case for CDs. At the time, I did not know how to describe this tiny case, but clearly it was the Civil War era. And he took from the case this less than half dollar sized CD [which I described as a metallic record without a hole in the middle] and he slipped it into the table top [it wasn't a desk at all].
Suddenly, the entire wall in front of me, I'd say that it must have been a good 50 feet or better, just opened up and it was like looking down on earth during the civil war. And I was in it as a human being, female, and all this killing was going on. And I said in my mind, 'Oh, I can't stand killing at all. This is why I didn't want to go to earth then.' And as quickly as I thought this, I was back by the angel and out of it, the wall closed and the metallic disk popped out which he replaced in the case and put back on the shelf.
After that we went about several cities, and I saw one quaint, another of like green glass, and then another like so many of our own great palaces or majestic buildings. The streets were indeed of gold, and this awesome fountain was in front of one massive building, that just sparkled blue-green light giving love from it. It is something you never forget.
He took me into this very massive structure, richer and more beautiful than anything we could ever create on earth. I realized that all paintings, all woven rugs, tapestries, carvings, all we create on earth that is beautiful has its seed from Heaven. We saw all this before we came to earth. We try to recapture some of Heaven while on earth. We deeply desire Heaven on earth. We miss Heaven deep in our souls.
I instantly knew that we were before we came here to earth and understood why we come to earth. We come but once, we do not reincarnate, but might remember a test phase before our final decision on the time frame of our life. We do get to check out the role we pick before we come and we basically know how it will go. We can even decide to come during the same time frame as others we knew very well in Heaven and try to meet while here. We do pick our families, and we do pick our race, color and creed. That's part of the test. There is no race, color or creed in Heaven, only here for the test. And I will explain why the test, why some are deformed, why there is good and evil as well. It was enlightened to me while there. And something almost like wait, wait, it is not yet time to reveal this information. There is logic to all of this as well.
I understood death was really a transitional birth. As a baby is born from the mother's womb, it actually has died to it's previous life in her womb-the life of water into the life of air. When we die to earth, we are born again, this time into the life of life from whence we originally came. It is full circle but must be done to pass the test.
This palace the angel took me to was spectacular and very, very high. I'd say the hallways were approximately 3 stories or more high. Very ornate and beautiful, marble hallways with exquisite paintings and these columns that were of gold and detailed with absolutely beautiful adornments on them. There was some form of writings on the doors, which were fully 25 feet or more high and automatic as well. The writings were more like ancient symbols but very familiar to me. I seem to understand them. And suddenly we came to these two very magnificent doors which automatically opened and this awesome presence filled the marble floored throne room. It was definitely the throne room and I was acutely aware that I was only being permitted to view the reflection of God's Light. Not the full force of His Awesome wonder.
I was so filled with love and wanting to hug Him with joy. And His voice came within my mind and He commanded me to stretch forth my hands and arms to see that I was made of solid light. And I did so. And then He infused within my mind the knowledge that we all are of solid light, male and female, each with our own identity and purpose. Each created before entry to earth and each was male or female prior to that entry. He contains both sides, and this is the truth of it. For it is not the sexual side but the strong and the gentle of each side of Him that determined who we'd be created. A balance of His being.
And He told me within my mind that I would understand who we are and why we are on earth. And that He used me as His instrument to bring forth these sons back to Him. That I'd agreed to this and that I was not being punished at all. These are His exact words: "They are treasures so rare, I can part with them no longer. I bring these sons through you for My vanguard. They need no further test." [I gave Our Father 8 sons at or right after birth, but never lost faith that He would send children for me to love and keep here on earth and He has given 5 children to love; now 4 with the murder of my eldest son in 1980 at age 24].
I have a peace most humans do not over death, because I know that is what Christ meant by the words: "Unless you are born again, you cannot enter into the Kingdom of Heaven." It has nothing to do with the meaning religion has given it at all. It means it is something we all must do.
Our Father also told me that I would have to go back to earth and complete my test, as it was not over and there was much that I needed to do. He affirmed that He loved me and would be with me all the days of my life [even when I fall down and fail Him, He has never left my side].
I understood why there was good and evil on earth. It is actually a real battle for our individual souls. It is why we all have a guardian angel or good angel prodding us to do good, and a tormentor tempting us to do wrong. There is a lot at stake here and frankly, Our Creator does not wish to loose one soul He created because we all are created out of Him and His love. It already saddens Him greatly to be loosing 1/3 of His angels who followed His first creation, Lucifer. He is overjoyed with the other 1/3 of the angels who followed Michael and defended Him, casting them out of Heaven. Note, cast out but not destroyed for good reason. Ever asked yourself why we call newborn babies 'little angels' or why we want 'heaven on earth'? Or why we look upwards to the sky and want to fly? Or why we are fascinated with space? Ever asked yourself what did the other 1/3 of the angels do during the battle in Heaven between the good angels and the bad ones? Ever wonder exactly how the battle was won? The battle was of the minds....LOVE versus HATE. Love won because Love is linked to God. HE is LOVE, LIFE and LIGHT. A Trilogy.
Life is also a trilogy and it is in the three forms we identify theologically to God as "Water, Air and Light or 'Living Waters, Breathe of God, Light of the World" or however we wish to describe the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Much like the Sun being the Father, while the sunshine is the Son and the warmth of the sunshine is the Holy Spirit.
Any way, I really did not wish to come back, but then again, knowing that I was an angel who had not made that choice in Heaven during that battle, and did not deserve being cast out nor getting to remain just because, I came back to continue the test. It also explained to me why it was possible for me to be hit by a car in a crosswalk in Feb. 55, be thrown 134 feet across the lanes head on into a streetcar and walk away from it without a broken bone. [LAPD has a police report.] Evidently, I must have remembered in that moment without consciously being aware of it, that I could fly [without wings]. I've had a life full of 'miracles' literally. Medical miracles written about and commented by doctors as "Only you and God would do this to me!"
The instant that Our Father sent me back, it was rapid...with the speed of light. I went through the universe so fast, and down to earth and down to my body [remember though that I also knew everything every one I loved or connected to me during death was doing at that precise time period while I was also in Heaven.]. I saw my body on the table, C-section performed and Michael was outside in the doctor's hands and I slammed in through my head as I watched Michael go out from his head and then I was out. In critical condition and did not awaken until the next day when the doctor came in to tell me that my son died. But, instead I told him about it all and the moment of Michael's birth back Home.
Image in 1958 trying to explain this to doctors! My priest was better at understanding what I was discussing and then I just stopped talking about it and got on with life. Because I now had the KEYS to the Kingdom of Heaven. It is about LOVE. One must love self, this way we love God. He is within each of us. We then can love other, including enemies. We are here to love life, to live life and express back to our Creator our joy in having life here and seeing how beautiful our world is regardless of how we make it. It is a very beautiful world which we should all stop to take into our souls for nourishment. I learned too that we are never asked to endure more on this earth than we were also given the ability to endure, if we reach inside ourselves for that grace. We agreed to the test. We were confident we could do it, too.
Oh, another thing I understood was that ghosts are just mentally projected images of the person sending the image, not the physical being. And that they can mentally touch, leave a scent of flowers, [or if evil the same] however, they cannot harm you. You have the RIGHT to make evil leave and they must. And a ghost is not thin air but a projection by thought when like walking through walls, etc. I even understand UFO's...it is what we EXPECT in our time frame chosen, so it is what we see and get. Each era is different with different sets of conditions and it is up to us to make what is important the focal point of our life. We need but love and with it we receive faith, hope and confidence to get through it.
Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience? No
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
At the time of the experience, was there an associated life threatening event? Yes
Imminent birth of 4th son, [2nd died at 2 months, 3rd died after birth] and I thought water broke, but actually was bleeding to death. Walked from kitchen where I'd thought water broke to den, called doctor, husband and mother [to care for 1st son who was napping], walked through living room [thought still leaking more water] to bed. Laid on bed to wait, continued to bleed through 2 mattresses to floor and by time husband arrived and loaded into car, was dying. Died en route to hospital in car.
What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience? While still at my home on the bed, I was suddenly acutely aware that I was dying and asked for my rosary beads. My 2 1/2 year old son, Larry had awakened from his nap, climbed out of his crib, come to my room and told me that he was going to go get Alice, a pregnant neighbor two doors down. She came and propped up the foot of my bed [told me later that Larry told her that mommy was all blood all over the house and needed her.] Alice gave me my rosary and she stayed with me praying as well until my husband came. En route to the hospital, I recognized the intense coldness was death and was afraid, then suddenly became very calm.
Was the experience dream like in any way? Not a chance! It is as vivid today as it was forty two years ago. I can close my eyes and relive it at any time. It was the most awesome, most wonderful experience I ever have lived. When my father was dying, he asked me to repeat it to him to prepare him for his birth. And was excited the night before when he realized it was coming momentarily. He was truly elated. My sister, also came to be with me when told of terminal brain cancer and asked not be put on any life sustaining equipment. She went joyfully, peacefully and with the knowledge I'd shared with her. My mother, in our care until the last 8 days of life on earth with colon cancer, asked me as well to repeat the experience for her and she went so peacefully and was absolutely beautiful. She was 82 and just prior to death [rebirth] looked old and ill. But in her casket, she looked so young that my grandson squealed with joy at his first ever viewing, calling his little sister up to see that their great-grandma was really with Jesus. The minister was overwhelmed by this child's remark to his sister. "Come see great-grandma. She's beautiful, she's young. She's with Jesus."
Did you experience a separation of consciousness from your body? Yes
Definitely. I told you that I was made aware that my new body was the body within this human form, that lovely body of solid light. I repeat: SOLID LIGHT, as you do not see through it at all. It is solid and we can move with the speed of light.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? At the moment of being born again, I felt overwhelming love, peace, joy, the knowledge that I was to really learn and live. I felt more alive than here on earth. It was like a heavy armor had dropped off and I was free at last. There was a warmth filling me. It all made perfect sense.
Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises? I heard the most awesome music in heaven. I mean awesome. There was no noise at the moment of being born again. No noise while hovering over all the humans important to me, other than being aware that I could read their thoughts or as in the case of my doctor, hear his commands to nurses and staff.
Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure? No
Did you see a light? Yes
As described above, when taken to the Throne Room, I saw the reflection of God's Light, not the full force of it. Like light glancing off a window or mirror, but not the fullness of Him. I could not have returned had I done so. And that was not immediate either, as I went on a grand tour of Heaven. I did see light within the waters, grass, trees, etc. but it was like loving light embracing or throwing back to me pure love.
Did you meet or see any other beings? Yes, My angel just appeared at my side. He was male, much taller than I am [I'm 5'5"] and wearing a long white gown, no cowl or wings [sorry, not needed to fly] He was human and I certainly felt like I knew him. He was my tour guide and educator. I believe I covered the communication phase above.
Did you experience a review of past events in your life? No
Nope, only knew that we judge ourselves. There is no big black book jotting down our misdeeds. That is not the point of life here. The point is Love. If we love our self, we must then love Our Creator within us. And love is all that is needed. If we try our hardest with love, and when we fall, ask forgiveness and try again [we are again loving self], we have no need for the review. Not unless we really want to put ourselves through this hell. It is not necessary, but I believe firmly that those who do experience it are doing so in order to regain their footing on the correct pathway, so they don't continue wrongly and possibly be lost to Our Creator.
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? Yes
I told my doctor everything he did and staff did from before he arrived at St. Joseph's Hospital to when I revived. I told my mother what she wore, where she drove, when she reached Larry and what she was thinking and praying. I told my father the same thing. Told my husband, David [we're divorced and both have remarried] all he was thinking and doing. Told each family member I was with exactly what they were doing at those precise moments. It was verified by telling each one and then watching their expressions and hearing their comments. I was right on the mark with each and every one of them during my multi-location period of death.
Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions? Yes
Heaven as described above. Heaven is a real firmament, a real place and beyond anything we can imagine. It is a learning place, a living place, our home we had to leave for the test and a place where will never be bored. We don't have to compete there, we can 'work' at learning there, we can vacation there, we can learn to play a musical instrument, fish or do all the things we'd love to do here that a good and healthy for our well being. A doctor can study more about the ways humans will learn to heal even. Whatever knowledge you desire to learn, whatever things you wish to make or do, you can. I know this within my soul.
Did you have any sense of altered space or time? Yes
The very fact I saw so much in Heaven, during such a brief period of time, gave me the realization that time is man's measure for order on earth but totally unnecessary in Heaven. Heaven is forever, without limitations.
Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? Yes, Absolutely! Our purpose is to return to Heaven where we were first created. We are but in this test and it is really very simple. Love. We chose our tests, we were confident before coming here that we could accomplish the test. And we agreed to have erased from memory who we are, why we are here and what Heaven is like. I believe that there is a precise reason why suddenly we all are coming out into the open as to these 'death experiences' and that it is the Will of our Creator we do so. In His time and as He willed it to be. This is a critical time period in the history of earth and we must be alert to LOVE. Our society has created havoc, evil is rampant, and we are more interested in earning more and more money, having more and more things to throw away for the latest, greatest new item and more disinterested in each other. We have less and less respect for life [ie: abortion, the thought of assisted suicides, etc.] and are even disrespectful towards earth. We care more about racing out into space instead of using the same money to feed the hungry in this world or clothe the naked, or cure the ills. It is easier to give people a pill than to honestly treat the sickness. It's why so many are mentally despondent. We lack love more and more with each passing day. Even the earth is upset, and it is seen in our weather changes and earth changes. Earth is of God, and God has not been hugged by His children for a long, long time.
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes
As stated above, the boundary was the unbounded spectacular view of Heaven, with many places to see and visit. I was never hemmed in or held in any room. I was taken all about but KNOW I only had a glimpse of Heaven.
Did you become aware of future events? Yes
Often am! My awareness has been accurate and very acute. I can often predict earthquakes. I feel them under my feet hours before they occur. I felt my son being murdered. I saw an 11 car accident I was minutes later in before it occurred so that I was able not to hit anyone as I was being hit by the 11 cars. I've seen so many events before they occur and could even tell others what was coming in their lives. I went to church, knelt down at the altar and asked Our Father to take that away from me, that lifting of the veil. I could not endure seeing others lives before they lived them out nor telling them. And told Him that I hoped He was not offended by my asking. That was taken from me that moment and I felt great relief. I have been able to find my husband's hidden children without one clue, just by thinking that I could do it. I believe we all are able to do this, but shouldn't rely on this ability to live out our lives. Knowing future events does not prevent bad ones from occurring because even with you warning, it still happens. Most don't listen. And I would not wish to be turned into a freak, draining my energies on such tasks. It isn't necessary to live our lives as we need.
Were you involved in or aware of a decision to return to the body? Yes
Absolutely! As I described above, I was directly told that I was returning and although I was saddened to come back here, I have tried to live each day with a smile on my face and as happily as I can no matter how bad it can be. Times have come that I have honestly gone outside and screamed at God, too. He knows it. And then I've felt His spirit hold me and wipe my tears and forgive me for it. So, I know that I cannot hold bad feelings towards others and must ask forgiveness of them and try harder to be the best I can. But, in honesty, I would have preferred staying there. However, God has sent me many joys on earth while here. My treasures are my children, and now my grandchildren.
Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience? Yes
I was able to foresee, but asked this be removed. I was also able to telepath, and experimented with Lou, a doctor and his wife, Dorothy [an RN] on this ability. In fact, she had a blowout coming with their 5 children one night from the Palm Springs area back to the San Fernando Valley, and Lou was at the hospital and we didn't have cell phones then. So, Dorothy telepathed to me where she was broken down, telling me to call Lou ant the hospital and to give him the location. I did so [about 11 PM] and he found her, changed the tire and then we all talked about this ability. My son, Larry was also an excellent sender and we'd often communicate mentally. And he and I often spoke while he was in the 14 days coma before finally surrendering to his re-birth. He told me a lot of things that have come true, for he was foretelling events which would occur because of his murder. And they happened. I actually don't try to practice these things.
Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience? Yes
I am not rigid about religion. God chooses who we are, where we are born with us. And it is not our place to judge one religion is the only way to keep the soul in good stead to get back to Our Creator. It's one of the reasons I do not understand Holy Wars. There is nothing Holy about any war. And since I died, I can and have forgiven my enemies. In fact, I pray for the men who killed my son. I want all of them to make it back to Him, and not be lost. And I am serious, too.
Has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices etc.? Career choices? People like me. I love people. I live a normal, healthy life. I don't go to church every Sunday as I practice loving God daily. I thank Him for flowers, trees, pretty skies [even cloudy days], and all the beauty still around us. I really believe I can do anything I want work-wise and have. I don't mean bad things, but good jobs which I've had no education to do. I believe in myself. My husband is my best friend and we know we were friends in heaven, probably in the same angel group. My life is filled with a beautiful home and lovely furnishings, etc. but I am not materialistic. It wouldn't matter if I lost it all. God knows that and I trust Him all the time. I live a normal life, make normal mistakes and try all over again. I'm a happy camper and do not act nor look my age, which is 64 1/2 years old. By all appearances, most folks think I'm late 40's, possibly 50. I also believed from that day forward NOTHING is impossible with God, and have had many IMPOSSIBLE experiences. Overdose of cobalt in 1959, weighed 83 pounds, given 6 weeks to live, told I'd never have another child in '59 and I surely did have more children.
Have you shared this experience with others? Yes
After it occurred, I did. Then just stopped sharing it because no one really seemed to understand it. I had the joy of it, and if they didn't want it, that seemed all right. I did share it with my husband when we met and he seemed to understand it completely. So, it made sense to him if my Grandmother came to visit after she died. Or if Mr. McKee gave me a message after his death for his son and daughter-in-law, etc.
About 3 or 4 years ago, it was almost as if I were pushed to start talking about the experience and in fact, I wanted to write a book about it and my life, as so many doctors and people have said I should. Here it is 4:45Am, I should be in bed and cannot stop writing this and will go to work at 8:00 and could have spent this time starting to write the book. But there you are! Any way, most people I've discussed this with have thanked me and I mean with great love and appreciation for telling them. I've often told a stranger even, and then been told that they needed [emphasis] to hear this at exactly that moment. So, I believe God is pushing all the NDEs to tell now. He wants our attention.
What emotions did you experience following your experience? I've no fear of death nor sorrow [except that I'll miss the person who goes ahead of me for awhile] when someone dies to earth. I have always felt a true sense of purpose and fulfillment, even if I fail. I know I can get back up, and know that life has purpose and honestly at times, miss God very much. Meaning being right there with Him, but know we must wait until it is in His will for each of us to return.
What was the best and worst part of your experience? The best was seeing all I did of Heaven, especially the reflection of God's Light. The worst was having to come back here but I have had some very intimate experiences with God that let me know He really cares for all of us more than we realize. So, it's not so bad.
Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience? Only that I really was trying hard to call in when you were on with Mike Siegel and couldn't get through the line. And feel so strongly that folks need to know there is really purpose to life and we need to straighten out soon. We're on a terrible downhill skid and need to pull upwards again.
Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? No
Not really as I always have loved God and humans, from the time I was a very small child. It may have sharpened in me an awareness to talk over the possibility that words or actions might have been misunderstood by another or that I might have injured someone's feelings, so I try harder to make amends or get it cleared up. Perhaps I would not have been so sensitive.
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? Yes
Events, not meds. I had an out of body on 8/1/57 but didn't truly recognize it until I thought it out afterwards. During spinal surgery, I believed I'd awakened during the operation and could see the operation in the overhead light over the surgery table. And I could see myself lying on the table with my back spread open, and the blood and all, and then some sort of panic as I was flipped to my side and some paddles hitting my chest. But, I thought because that faint memory of this event ended, they'd given me more anesthesia. However, afterwards, the more I thought about it, the more I recognized something happened abnormally, because I could not have been looking up into the light and seeing myself with my back open and me lying on my tummy. So, after I told my mom, she told me the nurse had come out and said they'd lost me because I was bleeding so badly and the doctor had clipped my spinal cord. Then, when they'd revived me, the same nurse came out and told the family that they'd gotten me back. And then the doctor told the family he was terribly sorry but I'd never walk or talk again and that they were unable to do the fusion they'd planned. [T10, 11 & 12 are honeycomb, egg shell thin and micro-fractured yet I walk and talk.] Boy, was the doctor ever surprised the next day when I asked to get up and did. I last saw him Dec. 1979.
The other time, was at the birth of my last son, 12/18/68 when I suffered cardiac arrest during my C-section. Again, it was a brief step out, which I fully understood and fast action pulling me back into my body.
Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes
Please offer any suggestions you have to improve the www.nderf.org questionnaire? Have you met others who have had a near death experience? I have many times over as if God ordains it now. And NOT through clubs, organizations, etc. that are studying this, but total strangers. Funnier yet, is how easy the conversations begin about the experiences. We seem to know each other and I wonder if we accepted this as a part of our life experience for a GREATER GOOD for God. There definitely is a Bigger Picture here on this subject.