Demi B NDE
My family was camping at Cape Lookout near Tillamook OR right on the ocean. I believe I was about 14 yrs old. I'd met a girl from another family camping there my same age and we were playing in the ocean together. I was in waist deep water when I stepped into a deep sinkhole and was pulled under by the current. I was terrified and fought desperately to reach the surface, but the current was too strong. Soon I felt an overwhelming feeling of peace and love and literally was aware of my soul leaving my body through the top of my head, there was no distress involved in this and I felt no sorrow or sadness for the body I was leaving behind, I didn't even look back at it. I was immediately embraced by an overwhelming sense of love and acceptance and was in a tunnel like space surrounded with indescribable colors and music. These were not colors or musical notes I'd ever heard before, there was NO fear, just an unbelievable sense of love. Ahead of me was a very bright light and I remember thinking that it was so bright that if I looked at it it would hurt my eyes, but it didn't. I didn't yet realize what the light was but immediately knew that that is where ALL things come from and it is where all things return and that when I was back inside the light I would know and be everything. I didn't see any people or sense their presence, I didn't see any sort of buildings or anything other than the beautiful colors, and I didn't hear anything other than the music. I was given messages, no one gave them to me, I just knew them and the closer I became to the light the more anxious I was to be in it, to ""return"" to all love and all knowledge. The first message I was given was that the single most important thing in the Universe is Love, that love is all that matters, that we are all the same and that we are all love. The message that caused me the most curiosity was that we are all the same, and it went on to say that I was exactly the same as everything in the universe and was specific enough to tell me that I was exactly the same as every blade of grass. Then I was given the message that it wasn't my time to be there, that I had things I needed to do here on this plain. I was upset by this news because this was the most indescribable and loving and all encompassing feeling I'd ever had and didn't want to return. I even remember protesting but being gently told that I had to come back to complete the things I was sent here to do. I had no sensation of returning to my body, my first memory was of being grabbed by my hair by my swimming companion, the girl I'd met on the beach and being pulled back up to the surface. My initial reaction was anger because I didn't want to be back, I wanted to be in the light, my second reaction was fear over what had just happened.
As I grew up I never spoke of any of this because I thought people would think I
was crazy, it wasn't until the seventies when Kubler-Ross came out with her book
'On Death and Dying' did I really start to think about it, so many similar
stories, maybe I wasn't crazy after all?
So as the years went on I struggled with what the message about me being
specifically the same as every blade of grass, I took college science, physics,
biology, chemistry and math classes to seek answers.
I learned the specific differences between a plant and animal cell and
could find no connection whatsoever.
I knew love was the foundation for everything but had grown up with a Pedophile
for a Father and all of the trauma associated with that type of abuse.
I became pregnant at 16 and married my then boyfriend who used to beat me
up. I divorced him and married a
very controlling man who had no joy in his heart and had my second child with
him, divorcing him 33 yrs later.
In my new life after my divorce one day I was flipping channels on the TV and
came across a program on physics, which I love, and stopped to listen to it.
The discussion was about 'String Theory' and it hit me like a ton of
bricks, after all those years and all of my searching for answers to the blade
of grass message I had my answer. It
was like being hit over the head with a baseball bat it was so clear to me.
When I was in college one of the great physics findings was the discovery
of Quarks, the smallest part of atoms, how nothing smaller could exist but I had
this profound feeling that if a Quark could be discovered and measured, on any
level, then it had to be divisible and that there had to be something inside
them. The TV program explained that
inside every Quark are thousands if not millions of strings, which are pure
energy, they are different shapes, closed like rubber bands or open and that
depending on the shape and vibration of the strings inside the quarks inside the
atoms determined if something was ""going to be a rock, an elephant, a person or
a blade of grass""!! That was my
answer, I knew that we were all made up of energy, I understood the laws of
physics, I knew quarks were divisible and they used the same verbiage, we are
the same as every blade of grass. It
became completely clear to me what my long ago message had meant, and even
though I'd always accepted and known that everything was the same now I knew
why. Plant and animal cells are
totally different, in all my searching for answers in my classes there was never
an explanation to me until then.
I am reading Anita Moorjani's book ""Dying to be Me"", her experience was so
similar to mine in so many ways, most importantly the unbelievable and
indescribable feeling of love and of being literally a part of everything that
it brought it all back to me. I've
certainly never forgotten any of it, but it really made me remember the specific
experience and love. It wasn't just
that I felt unbelievable love, I WAS unbelievable love, God is love and that God
was within me and all of us. I am
not a religious person, because of
my experience to me the answers do not lie in any organized religion.
I know that every society, no matter how remote or how primitive, all
recognize a higher power, whether it be a tree, a rock or waterfall, or the
ceremonies in organized religion. To
me the answers lie within us, but even with this knowledge and even with having
actually been on the other side and gaining such knowledge, I still
live in the human form and it is far too easy to get caught up in life's
events. I saw your website in her
book and literally closed the book and went to this site to share my story.
It is real. It is unexplainable.
It is the most amazing experience I'd ever had, or ever will have while
on this plain, but I know it's real because I was there, if only for a few
moments. I know that similar
experiences are different for different people but I also know that there are
enough similarities and shared experiences that it's real.
And I know because I was there, it is real.
My goal for myself is to remember it all, to share with those who are open to it or interested in it. My husband was very much a skeptic and made fun of me so it was never discussed with him. I want to work on myself and honor my messages and work on not letting myself get so caught up in life stressors. I was working at a very stressful job, an Office Manager in an assisted living community. The job was overwhelming, the Corporate folks demanded unachievable goals and berated you when you were unable to do them. The pressure was non stop and my spirit was at an all time low about a year or so ago. At that time I was diagnosed with stage three melanoma from a mole on my shin that had spread to two lymph nodes in my groin. I took leave from work and went through several very large and painful surgical procedures, one of which becoming infected afterwards and spending two more weeks in the hospital sicker than I'd ever been in my life. But I recovered, my follow up PET scan shows no Melanoma, but I do have several suspicious moles, one of which I just had another pretty big surgery to remove from my thigh. So, as time goes on I will most likely have to have more removed, but of course the trick will be to catch them early enough, my initial site did not look suspicious, it had changed but not in any of the ways melanoma does. When I went to my GP to have it removed she looked at it and said ""I can guarantee you it's not Melanoma"". But it was, and a rare form that doesn't present like the text books say. During this process I was very in touch with my near death experience, in this plain and in this life, I didn't want to die and I certainly didn't want to die a painful death from cancer, however, I understood that whatever happened was supposed to happen to me. A wonderful surgeon came into my life, his energy when he first walked into my exam room assured me that if this could be OK, that he'd be the man to make it so.
I was fired from my job in July of this year for a ridiculous reason, I'd been
there five years and had endured stress levels that made me sick, but I did my
best. The afternoon of the day I was
fired I was told that my recent biopsy was positive for melanoma but it was in
the very early stage and non-invasive but a bigger surgery would be required.
Being fired and finding out you have more cancer on the same day was a
pretty big hit, I'm coming to terms with the job, all of my friends and family
are glad I'm out of that environment because it was
making me sick and some feel it may have been the cause of my melanoma.
More likely it was caused because I was a fair haired child who played at
the beach any chance I had, which is why I had my NDE.
An unknown girl rescued me, a profound life altering event happened to
me, and I know it's real.
Since being fired I'm attempting to rediscover my joy, which has always been
hard for me starting from a very young age because of the sexual abuse from my
father. Going through trials and
tribulations of life, being in two bad marriages, always feeling ""less than"",
trying my hardest but it never being enough.
So, at age 65, struggling financially, I decided that my partner and I
needed to so something just for us to help us both re learn to laugh and slow
down and love our lives. We bought a
pair of tricycle motorcycles, we're going to take our safety classes and we're
going to zip around this beautiful Island on Puget Sound that we live on, and I
am going to work on decompressing and loving everything.
I will be stopping to smell the roses much more often and winking at the
grass because I know our secret!!!!
At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Caught in undertow in the ocean, unable to surface.
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I don't have the words to describe it, there aren't any words to really describe it, we're not aware of that love and acceptance and beauty in this plain.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I felt myself expanding and realizing that I was returning to the source of all love and all wisdom.
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I felt a love I'd never felt, the colors and the music were so amazing, I knew I was part of all of this. I didn't really understand but knew that when I got into the light that I would know all and be all, that it was where everything comes from and returns to. Love was everything.
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. During the experience was pure joy and love, immediately prior was pure terror as I knew I was caught in the ocean current and unable to breath, I fought as hard as I could.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing during the experience was heightened, the music I heard was nothing I'd ever heard, and I didn't just hear it, I was it. Immediately prior I was underwater and have no specific recollection of hearing anything.
Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body? Yes The tunnel with the amazing colors, the bright light ahead, the beautiful and unknown music, the overwhelming sense of love and warmth, knowing I belonged there and that I had come from there. The messages I was given, including the fact that we are all the same and specifically that I was the same as every blade of grass. Being told that I couldn't stay, that there were things I needed to do before I could come back.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? LOVE LOVE LOVE!!! Pure love, acceptance, warmth, peace, knowing without any doubt that this is were we all came from. Sweet, sweet love, all love.
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes A tunnel of colors with beautiful music.
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes A very bright light ahead of me, I was concerned that it would hurt my eyes if I looked at it, but it didn't. I knew that everything came from the light and returned to it, and I knew that when I was inside it I would have all knowledge, that I would be all knowledge and love
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
I didn't so much hear a voice as I sensed it. It was very clear and I knew it was real and right.
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
It was indescribeable. But the most important thing I can say is that it was real and that it was total, all consuming love.
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Because I was rescued quickly I know I couldn't have been there for more than a few seconds or maybe a couple of minutes. It seemed as though I was a part of time, that it had no meaning as we know it.
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
I understood that love was the most important message and that we are all the same, I was told that I, personally, was exactly the same as every blade of grass. Many years later, after much research on how this could be possible, studying in college to see how my cells could be the same as plant cells, I learned about "String Theory". I saw the light ahead and while I already felt I was gaining knowledge of the Universe, I knew when I got to the light I would be knowledge.
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes
I was given the message that it wasn't time for me to be there yet, and that there were things on this earth that I needed to do. I remember being so disappointed and questioning this and being told that I had to come back to complete the things I was to do.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was "sent back" against my will
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly life (“life after death”)? Yes As I approached the light I knew that was where I had come from, where everything had come from, and that everything returns to. I knew that I was a part of and connected to everything, that everything was love and energy and that we are all a part of it. I knew through the laws of Physics that you cannot create or destroy energy, and I learned that in my experience, that we are a never ending energy force.
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist? Yes I didn't see a God like being, I saw no beings, but was immediately aware that there was a power there that has been described as God. This energy was communicating with me and this energy gave me very specific messages. This was also the same energy that told me I had to return to my body, that I hadn't completed the things I was sent to do. I felt totally at one with this energy, it was a part of me, as if I was the energy source and was communicating with myself, but I knew it was a much higher power that I was a part of. I feel that this energy, or God like awareness is within myself and that being in the tunnel I became one with it, or somehow my spirit allowed this awareness to return to me. I knew that all knowledge was in the light and that once there I would be and know everything and was anxious to enter it, it was like going home only magnified a billion times. I was comforted, accepted, loved and I felt a total connection with the supreme energy force.
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime? Yes That love is the most important thing in the universe.