EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:
I
had just finished a long semester of school and went to visit a friend. When we
got there he had some Marijuana. Which I had smoked before, and wasn't always
against it. After taking 2 deep inhales, I immediately knew something wasn't
right. I knew that it wasn't entirely Marijuana. I started to feel my heart rate
increase. I stood up and tried to walk around to see if it would help. Within 5
minutes I knew it wasn't good. I turned to my friend and told him to call 911
because I was having a heart attack. He told me to try and calm down and that I
was just having a bad trip. I immediately responded that I knew the difference
and this was something very physical. He had me walk outside with him to get
some fresh air. But as we stepped out onto the grass I knew that my heart was
beginning to pound even harder and that it was harder to breathe. My friend
called 911. I remember telling him, that if I passed out, to tell them
everything. That it could save my life. I remember at that moment I knew I was
going to die. It became so real to me the phrase "you never know when your time
will come." I was so aware that I was 28 and my life was going to end. The only
regret I had was that I hadn't called my parents that day.
I
remember hearing the lady on the other end of the phone asking my friend what I
was doing. He just kept telling her that I was clutching my chest and breathing
deeply. She had us go outside on the grass so that the ambulance could find us.
The ambulance was having a hard time finding us. I remember hearing the
ambulance off in the distance and as I laid down on the grass, I turned to my
friend and told him that if the ambulance did not get there soon I was going to
die. At about that time a fire truck arrived. In which a few men stepped out and
started asking questions and I started to realize the complete urgency of my
situation and that I was dying. I couldn't fully answer their questions. And as
they stood around me, I remember shouting out "help me." They replied, "we have
nothing to help you with." Minutes the ambulance finally arrived and within no
time I was on a stretcher. My heart pounding near out of my chest, breathing
labored. The EMS began asking me questions, in which I was not able to answer.
At that moment I remember feeling my heart start pounding even harder and I knew
that I was about to die. I couldn't take it anymore, and I said the words "God,
I'm ready to go home!" As the last word ended, the lights went completely out
and everything was completely quiet. I felt the calmness come over me. A calm I
had never felt in my life. Just utter peace. Time stood still, linear time did
not exist. I did not have a thought going through my brain. It was pure calm. At
that moment an intense bright light began to envelope me. I remember how good I
felt, with this light and pure calm that was around me. Then as the light began
to increase and the calm began to increase, then out of nowhere a voice said
"you're not ready yet". I remember realizing I had a body, that this wasn't all
I remembered and I said the exact words, "I'm not ready yet." Instantly I was
back in my body, I could feel my heart again. The EMS yelling around me "he's
having a heart attack." After that I looked up and they had cut my shirt off and
I had all stuff attached to me chest, a breathing tube in my nose and IVs hooked
up into my hands and arms. After that I awoke in the hospital to the doctors and
nurses around me. They were talking and asking me questions in which I had no
idea what the answer was. I went back out of it. I awoke a few hours later. A
nurse at my side asked me what day it. It was so difficult to answer, but it
eventually came back to me.
A
few minutes later I heard a voice that I recognized out in the hall. It was one
of the EMS. He came in and said he was glad to see me alive. We talked for a few
minutes and I thanked him for saving my life.
After I left the hospital the only word and resounding feeling I had and could
take from the whole ordeal was LOVE. I knew deep down that our sole purpose on
this earth is to love. To love deeply and strongly. Life is Love. I will take
that with me for the rest of my days. I am not afraid of death at all anymore. I
know that an after-life awaits us that is beyond anything our human minds can
comprehend.
On a side note, one other thing that has always stood out in my mind. Growing
up, I had a Christian upbringing. I had always heard of heaven as "home" but had
never really used the term. But when I was near death and I said "God, I'm ready
to go home" I knew with all my heart that my soul had taken over. That my soul
was ready to return to it's home. That we are all here as a lease. To fulfill a
purpose and when that purpose has been fulfilled. We will return home.
At
the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?
Yes
Drug Overdose
Was
the experience difficult to express in words?
Yes
At
what time during the experience were you at your highest level of
consciousness and alertness?
When the light and calm came over me
How
did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience
compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness?
Normal consciousness and alertness
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that
you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.
Everything was crystal clear
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that
you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.
Everything was silent
Did
you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your
consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?
No
What emotions did you feel during the experience?
pure
calm
Did
you pass into or through a tunnel?
No
Did
you see an unearthly light?
Yes An immense and intense surrounding light
Did
you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable
voice?
I
heard a voice I could not identify
Did
you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who
are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha,
etc.)?
No
Did
you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?
No
Did
you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?
No
Did
you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?
No
Did
time seem to speed up or slow down?
No
Time
stood still, linear time did not exist
Did
you suddenly seem to understand everything?
No
Did
you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?
No
Did
you come to a border or point of no return?
I
came to a definite conscious decision to "return" to life
Did
scenes from the future come to you?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly
life (“life after death”)?
No
Just the complete peace and calm
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist?
No
just the voice that told me I was not ready
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not)
exist?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
regarding earthly life’s meaning or purpose?
Yes
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
regarding earthly life’s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
regarding love?
Yes That we are here for that purpose. Life is love
During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information /
awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living
our earthly lives?
No
Did
you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?
Yes I felt that I was here for a purpose. I began writing music almost
immediately after my NDE
What occurred during your experience included:
Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of
your experience
How
accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events
that occurred around the time of the experience?
I
remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around
the time of the experience
Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your
experience:
I
quit drinking and doing drugs immediately. I felt that I was not the same
person.
My experience directly resulted in:
Large changes in my life
Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that
occurred as a result of the experience?
Yes I realized that my partying was hindering my purpose here in life and that
this was my second chance to work towards it.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful
or significant to you?
LOVE, that is all. I truly Love life
Do
you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience
that you did not have before the experience?
No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful
or significant to you?
LOVE, that is all. I truly Love life
Have you ever shared this experience with others?
Yes
I immediately shared the experience with my Dad and he was very welcoming of it.
I still find it hard to talk to people about it.
Did
you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your
experience?
Yes I had heard of it. I was not knowledgeable on the subject.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to
weeks) after it happened:
Experience was definitely real
What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:
Experience was definitely real I have tried to pick holes or see if it might
have been something else. But without a doubt in my mind this experience
happened and it was real.
Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?
Yes
Every relationship with every other person I come into contact with has changed.
Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result
of your experience?
Yes
I
attend church every Sunday
At
any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the
experience?
Yes certain movies or sermons in church have brought back strong emotions with
the experience.
Did
the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and
comprehensively describe your experience?
Yes
What could a national organization with an interest in near death experience
(NDE) do that would be of interest to you?
Help people who have had these experiences get in touch with each other. I want
to talk to someone who has had a NDE.
