Here is my
NDE--the Miracle in my Life=)
Back in April of 1991,
I had bought some fish at the store, and brought it home and cooked it.
At the time, I thought it was delicious!!. The next day, I went on to work, although, I didn't feel to
well, but I have stomach problems anyway, so held it down to that.
By the end of the day--I could not walk, and was starting to get really
sick, and thought it was intestinal flu. I
had to go in the women's restroom and lay down, and was crying, as being this
way--was NOT how I normally am. I
made it home and went in and laid down. Hub
kept checking on me, and I couldn't eat anything at all.
Throughout the night, I spent most of it in the bathroom, most of the time
having to crawl there, as I never considered myself a sissy, and never ask for
help. Thank God the shower was next
to the toilet is all I can say. I
manage to go thru about 13 pair of underwear that night.
When morning came, I knew I had to stay home, as I was weak, and could
hardly walk! VERY unusual for me,
as I had not missed one day of work in 10 years at this job. Actually--I never
missed work on the other job I had before this one, as I don't believe in it=)
Not even when I was sick: I still
went to work, and always gave my very best.
Throughout the morning my hubby called a few times to see how I was, and at
one point he asked my temperature, and I told him--I was just to weak to even
care what it was, although an hour earlier I had taken it and it was 104.
My hub told me to take it again, and he would call me back.
I said okay--and thinking I had hung up the phone--I went back to sleep.
He tried to call, and got a busy signal, so he left work, and told me
later he drove 110 MPH to get there, knowing something was not right.
By the time he got there, I was at the point, of beginning to cross
over--going to the Light. My Mom
and brother who had been dead for 5 years (they died 6 months apart, to the day)
were the ones who came to take me
Home. I did not realize at the
time, though, that it was my brother--to me--he looked like a guy who looked
like Howdy Dowdy, and smiling and saying " Come with us Ruthie, we are
having FUN!!" He said this over and over.
It was about a month after my NDE to figure out it was my brother, as he
really DID look like Howdy Dowdy, in younger days--reddish hair and
freckles!!LOL=) We went
thru thousands of Souls, and did not hurt any of them.
There was one little girl--when I looked into her eyes--I looked into her
Soul, and knew I knew her. I just figured out, this year, that little girl was
ME--who had left when I was seven because I was sexually abused, and when that happens
to a child, all innocence is lost, so she left. My Child Spirit.
She showed herself to me several other times since the first time--trying
to get me to recognize, no matter what happens, you have to learn to love
yourself . Until you can do that, you cannot love others.
My Mom would not say anything to me--nothing at all--but kept watching me
in a mirror-sorta. I stroked her
hair, as it was our thing when she was alive--I loved to comb her hair and
stroke it. I did this for a long time, and kept trying to get her to talk to me,
to no avail. To this day, I only have to close my eyes and imagine--and I can
still feel her hair=). I figured out about 2 weeks after why she would not talk
to me---She knew if she said one word to me--I would allow myself to cross on
over to the Light--and she knew it was not my time.
My heart ached to be with my Mom, but--she knew my work was not done
here. There was a being-beside me--took me a long
time to figure out---he was hooded and had his arm around my shoulder. At first
I thought he was the Grimm reaper, complete with Skelton bones and hood, but I
did not know who he was, at the time-and I never spoke of him for years--as I
considered him to be evil--but I
didn't pay him any mind. I have since read of others who have seen this hooded
being, and I am still not sure who he really was.
I was too busy stroking my Mom's hair, at the time--and wanting to be
with her--as I missed her so badly.
Finally my hubby woke me up, shaking me till I almost fell off the bed.
When I looked into his eyes, I saw what I thought to be pure Hate--but figured
out later it was fear, as he knew I was dead at that time.
It scared him so badly--even to this day, he will not speak of my NDE
with me. When I
was finally able to crawl out of bed, I crawled down the hall and to the front
doors, naked, as I didn't have energy to get dressed, and I looked out the
doors, and I had NEVER seen so much color and beauty in my life! I swear, I
thought it was Eden, as it did not look that way 5 days before. Flowers had
bloomed leaves on the trees--which usually takes longer than 5 days in
Ks--but--it all happened, during my NDE. I
considered that to be a miracle too=) It absolutely amazed me this could happen
so quick! I went
to the doctors on the fifth day of a temperature of 105. I do not know why my
brain did not cook, and the doctors called it a miracle.
They did a full exam, and found that ALL of my female organs were gone. I
hold this to being a Re-birthing thing=). Another odd thing, is my skin had
turned red as a stoplight and they did not know why--didn't have a clue--as they
had never seen anything like this before. About 2 weeks later even inch of my
skin peeled off--like a snake skin, even the bottoms of my feet. Not one iota of
skin I had--was the old skin. I returned to work on Monday--and had so much
energy--that I could toss an Oak pallet-and they re HEAVY!!!!-about 10 feet.
I should not have been able to do this, considering the 17 pounds I had
just lost, and what I had just been thru=). I only weighed 98 pounds, when I
went back to work. It
was months before I found--every thing I saw--to really have happened. I did not
understand at all, but--I knew--what had happened to me--was something that
would forever change my life. I
would do it all over again--to become what I am today=)
Hope you enjoyed=)