Guy's NDE

Experience description: 

      I died.  Simply, I died.  I was there, in the ICU....They were trying to save me...but I still died. Death was not bad.  Jesus was really there.  He and I were looking over the edge of the pit, sort of looking at where hell was.  It reminded me of when I was little, looking over the edge of a bridge to the water below....it wasn't scary, just looking.  He put His Arm around me.  He loved me.  Perhaps we were looking back at earth, I don't know.  I want more recollection of it all, because it is so important.. but as I said above, they were giving me medicines, and I just can't remember everything.  But I know I was There!!  And I know I died.  And I know that I woke up again in my own body, and I was SO SAD.  Sad beyond words.  I had been to Freedom with God...now I was trapped back here.


Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience:  Uncertain
      Explanation:  I don't know what medicines they were injecting into me..  I saw and heard them (nurses/doctors) calling for, giving me medicines, but I don't know what they were....  And, actually it really didn't matter what they were giving me, as I was no longer there to experience them...to gain benefit/detriment from the medicines....The medicines were inconsequential.  They had nothing to do with what was then happening to me, nor where I was going.
Was the experience difficult to express in words?  Yes
      What was it about the experience that makes it hard to communicate?  Absolutely no one can understand where I have been, unless they have been there too.
I have tried to explain this to my family members....but to no avail.  I feel alone.  I feel like no one really understands where I have been.  Impossible to communicate??  That's an understatement!  There aren't any words that I can find to describe what happened.
At the time of the experience, was there an associated life threatening event?  Yes
      Describe:  I was dying from pneumonia.  No air.  No heartbeat.  3 times.  What can I say?

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?  pretty alert.  Aware of pain, and their efforts to save my life just before I slipped away.

It was better there, than it is here.
Was the experience dream like in any way?  No, it was not dreamlike.  It was reality.
Did you experience a separation of consciousness from your body?  Uncertain
Describe your appearance or form apart from your body:  I was just "Myself" for whatever that means.  I know the Doctors and Nurses were doing there best to help me, I know they wanted to save me...but I was already far away by then. And it was much better there than here.  I thank them for their hard work, and their concern, but where I was, was still better than here.
What emotions did you feel during the experience?  emotions?  Try to describe the universe.  That's how I felt.  There is no explanation.  It is beyond all words I know.
Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?  I heard things going on around me in the ICU.  I heard the people.  I heard their concern.  And then, whooooosh, I was somewhere else.  And I liked it there.  It was warm.  It was friendly.  God was there.  All was well.  And it was better there.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?  Uncertain
      Describe:  I went through a 'barrier' yes.  Not a tunnel, not that light tube thing that so many people describe.... but some sort of 'barrier', yes.

I went from 'here' to 'there'.  I don't know 'where' that is, but it was nice there, and I was so angry when I found out that I was not there anymore.  Still so angry

Did you see a light?  Uncertain
      Describe:  see above answer

Did you meet or see any other beings?  Yes
      Describe:  Jesus was there.  He was kind, warm, gentle, loving, and he cared about me.  He received me.  He is REAL.  I always believed in Him before..but now I can promise that he is REAL.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?  No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?  No
      Describe:  No one believes me, about what was there.  They verify that I died three times...but no one believes that I was somewhere else. 

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?  Yes

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  Yes

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?  Yes

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?  Yes
      Describe:  I was here and then I died.  And then I went "there".
I don't know how to describe it.  But it was wonderful,
it was warm, it was nice, and I much prefer it to here.

I did not want to come back to here.

Did you become aware of future events?  No response

Were you involved in or aware of a decision to return to the body?  Yes
      Describe:  I was sent back...but I did not want to come back.
I wanted to stay there.
Living is the hard part.  Being with God is the good part.

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?  No

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?  Yes
      Describe:  I am such a different person.  Not much that I thought
was important before I died really is important.

Now I feel foreign to this world.

Has the experience affected your relationships?  Daily life?  Religious practices etc.?  Career choices?  I am a different  person than I was before.  I have experienced marked personality changes.  And all in all, I feel like
I do not belong here anymore.  I do not relate to my wife in the same way anymore...In fact, I can't even get close to her anymore....She is so caught up in this world, so unaware of what is to come...we have nothing in common anymore.

Have you shared this experience with others?  Yes
      Describe:  No one believes me.  They say it was just drugs and medicines.
But I know for real I was there.

There is another place beyond here; Jesus is there.
This is not the end.
There is so much more to life.
No one who was not been there will understand you
  when you talk about it.  IF they have not been there,
  they will say you are crazy.  You're not!

What was the best and worst part of your experience?  worst:  I feel so disconnected from everything around me now.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?  Yes
      Describe:  Serious difficulty relating to immediate family now.

Divorce imminent.

I can't live with someone who will not understand,
  or believe that what I saw, where I was, etc, was
  real.  All the THINGS that were important before,
  are not important now.  RELATIONSHIPS are important. 
  Not things.  She continues to want 'things'.  I can't
  live like that anymore.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?  No

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?  Yes