I was above myself looking down, as I was placed in the ambulance. I was flanked by two unknown presences that were supportive, but didn't speak. That is all I remember. I believe it was a sign for me to move forward toward healing, noble suffering, and to find more healing. I began a spiritual path of meditation and began to experience more, deeper spiritual states. Like being a small thread in a weave created in a giant field of fabric. A presence said I was unimportant. That was a sense of relief. After holding that space for a while, I felt that the only important thing was for me to be of service to my students. I felt I could do that by letting them be supported and encouraged in the arts of drawing, painting, and creativity. In another meditation, I sensed a being of light and felt my own light emerge inside me. I wept. I tried to embody that feeling of light. Another time, I sensed that: 'This is the one that never dies' and I felt a sense of light and freedom in my being. I think that anything experienced in an out of body experience can be had inside the body in this life, also. I now believe that any time I'm triggered by someone, or have strong feelings and reactions to them, that says more about who I am than anything about them.
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Suicide attempt.
If they hadn't pumped my stomach there might have been a life-threatening situation.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I don't remember any form, maybe I was entirely me but I just was looking down on myself.
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? I felt alert
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I felt alert
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes There were two beings flanking me, being very supportive of me.
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I had no emotions; I was interested in what was happening.
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? No
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal
What is your religion now? Liberal
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Uncertain I went to lots of therapy and read a lot. Years later, I went on a spiritual journey to find out if there was more to life than suffering. I found great joy and relief. I still work hard with my difficulties but now I believe I have real knowledge.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life If I had not had this experience I may have just given up on life.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Personal relationships I'm more tolerant of people's personalities. My 32-year marriage has gotten more interesting. I can stand up in front of 20 students and talk to them.
After the NDE:
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? No No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? That my parents were so upset. The best was that I liked the self that was observing me and that I wasn't alone.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I spoke to my meditation teacher about it for the first time a few months ago. I went to a NDE, OBE meeting recently. Things make so much sense to me now.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Early on in my meditation practice.