Experience Description

In the basement of our house, I was helping my husband with locksmithing job. I moved his gun, in its holster, to work on the locks. As I was beginning to set the weapon on the floor, it slipped out of the holster and rotated. It was pointing toward me and fell hammer first onto a metal stand. The Ruger Blackhawk .357 revolver had a defective safety and fired. I saw, heard, felt, and smelled the gun/bullet in that order. I grabbed my abdomen. The bullet had entered left and about 3 inches from my navel. The only pain at that time was a burning sensation at the entrance sight.

I screamed for my husband, who was outside, and walked to the open door. When he saw my wound (he was a retired firefighter/emergency medical technician), he grabbed me and laid me on the floor. We lived in the country, so I was taken by ambulance to a school where the helicopter met us and flew me to the medical center.

During the flight I was conscious the entire time. As we landed at the hospital, the paramedic radioed that my BP was 50/0. The surgical team met us at the landing pad and I was taken right into surgery. They put a mask over my face and I convulsed as they gave me a paralyzing drug. As they intubated me, I heard a nurse say 'Okay, she's ready.'

I felt a searing/cutting from the top of my sternum down my torso. I could only scream in my mind that I was still conscious and wasn't asleep. I felt the surgeon lift up the right side of my intestines and then the left side looking for damage. On a pain scale of 1 to 10, that was a 15. I was pleading for God to take me, it was so excruciating. When the doctor stopped, I said 'never mind.' He then worked higher in my torso; I felt sewing around my right lung.

I then became aware of a light off to my left. I no longer felt my body, but I believe I was still in it. I realized that my grandmother and great-grandmother were standing at the entrance to the light. My grandmother had died in 1978 and I had never met my great-grandmother. Both were native. They told me by telepathy, that it was not my time and that I had more to do. During this time, I have no idea how long this lasted. I was completely immersed in the most incredible love, contentment, acceptance, feeling of being home, that you only could imagine. In fact, we don't have words to describe the feelings.

The next memory I have is my internist asking me to squeeze his hand. When I had my NDE, the surgeon was giving me heart massage to keep me alive. No one expected me to live. The recovery was awful, but I did it. The surgeon was horrified that I was awake for the surgery. They compared my memories with the recording and I was right.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: April 16, 1987

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident. CPR given. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Liver damaged, loss of partial lung, shrapnel throughout torso including the heart sack

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? During the NDE: It was an all-encompassing alertness, totally focused on one thing.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No Not aware of time

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Not really different

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. No hearing

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I sensed their presence

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My grandmother and great-grandmother

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant Some native American beliefs & practices

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes Religion is so much more meaningful to me now, I feel a connection.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Catholic Practicing spiritual advisor re: haunting & other paranormal issues

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I always knew there was more to life than what most people believe

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Everything I do, I must answer to

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I sensed their presence

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes God

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes The soul/spirit does not die

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Heaven awaits us after the body dies

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I just KNEW God exists

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I have been driven to learn all I can about ghosts/spirits/paranormal issues.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes That we are all in school to evolve into better beings

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes That this life is a school & that when we die we go home. There is a God, heaven and we return to our ancestors & pets.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes That we co-exist with many dimensions

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes Suck it up & do the best you can, otherwise you get to do it all over again

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Most important way to live.....love and compassion for everything & everybody

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life Large changes in my life. I came back a different person. All my misconceptions were stripped away and I was exposed to the truth. Many of my family and friends hold me at arms-length afterwards, because they think I'm crazy.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I don't tolerate liars, cheats and people that embrace evil.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Words can't convey the feelings!

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience It seems more real than life itself.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I attract and can help trapped spirits cross over. I can sense energy changes/anomalies.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Seeing my ancestors, makes me smile and filled with love.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Right away, they tolerate my ramblings.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I knew it was real, end of story.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I know it's real, end of story.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It was a gift.