Experience Description

I was swimming in the 'Young Men's Christian Association' (YMCA) pool. I didn't know how to swim yet so I stayed next to the side of the pool. I would get to the side, push off with my feet, and feel the water as I slid through it. I did this in the shallow area. On this day there was only me, a boy about my age, and a lifeguard on duty. As I was doing my usual wall push, the lifeguard walked out and left us alone. Within a minute or two, the boy left and I was alone. I continued doing my wall push but did not realize I had made my way to the deep end. When I pushed off the board, I usually go far, into the center of the pool. Except this time, there was no floor under my feet and I could not swim. Naturally, I began wailing around and screaming, as I would try to come up for breath and doggie paddle. I wasn't good at that either. Gradually, I made it to the surface less and less. I wasn't frightened. I just wanted to breathe. I wasn't not frightened because I was fearless. It was because I was so focused on getting air that I didn't have the thought to be frightened.

Then G-d came to me. There were two angels on either side of me. They were on each side of my shoulders behind me, and almost above my shoulders, but not where I could see. I only saw a glimmer of their light. Then G-d told me to breathe the water in like it was air. Instantly as I heard his voice, I had a calm and peace that cannot be experienced on earth. I did as he said without hesitation, and breathed in the water like it was air. I quit fighting and began to even out inside the water. I was no longer feet down and head up; I was level with the water. As I breathed the water in, it did not hurt at all. In fact, it felt just like breathing air. I would take the water in, and then expel it just as you do with air. I did this as I was falling to the bottom of the pool. I looked up and saw the wavy ceiling from the waves of the water. Then I looked to my right and watched the tiles float by me as I made my way to the bottom. When I hit the bottom of the pool, my body was perfectly straight and all my body hit at the same time. At that point, I passed out.

The boy came back into the pool area and saw me, he ran for help and the lifeguard that left us came in. Because we knew the timeline for how long I had been in the pool, they were able to announce me dead and declare that even in the best of circumstances, I would have had to have been dead for twenty-plus minutes by the time the ambulance arrived. The lifeguard went to lunch on schedule, it just happened to be before the other lifeguard bothered to come into work that day. The other lifeguard was running late and this lifeguard did not want to miss her scheduled lunch. So, she left right on time. The boy remembers walking out and seeing her with a sandwich in her hand, which was, verified as the timeline since she had a routine for getting her sandwich when she walked out of the pool area. They also could not get me out of the pool, and that kept me in longer.

The head emergency medical technician declared me dead. But the younger emergency medical technician that had not ever had anyone die on him, continued CPR. Several people including the head emergency medical technician tried pulling him off. He continued for twenty minutes. Then in a flash, all my blood came soaring in and I began bleeding from all orifices due to the intense pressure of my blood starting again. I bled from my ears, eyes, nose, and mouth. They took me to the hospital with only the slightest chance that I would live and a hundred percent diagnosis of extreme and irreversible brain damage.

I was out of the hospital within a few days. I have a genius IQ that I had before the accident.

But what I've never known is why? Why bring me back? Nothing in my life changed? Not for the better anyways. Many say it all started after the death, but I am not sure since it never made sense to me anyways. But I see things. Sometimes they come in the form of dreams. Sometimes I can touch someone and see their past. Sometimes I can just look at someone and see into their past.

I all but stopped telling people what I would see when I was twelve. I 'called' the future so many times that my friends began calling me a witch. Some became afraid of me. But when I really refused to see anymore was in 1997.

For months, I had this dream, very vivid, with all details of my death. I was thirty-one. I don't know how, but somehow I know the difference between regular dreams and visions. This was a vision. I was so afraid of it that I had already made plans to never drive or be in a car during my entire thirty-first year of life. This dream went on for months. What I didn't know was, it wasn't me in the car. It was my brother's death that I was seeing.

This happened exactly as in my dream. It happened in the same car, which he just bought. I didn't know it yet, but it happened on the same street, the same color of car, and he was thirty-one years old. He had just turned thirty-one not two months before. I began having the dreams just before his thirty-first birthday.

At that point, I became so angry with G-d for letting me see these things and not letting me help, that I said 'enough'!!! Ever since then, when a vision tries to come to me, I refuse it.

My brother and I, although born from different marriages, were born on the same day. Although no one on either side of the family had birth marks, we both had one on our right thigh, in the shape of a tiny brown circle. When he died, mine faded to half a circle and has stayed that way since.

And what happened at his viewing and after I got home is a whole other story in itself. I even have pictures.

But that was my breaking point. I had seen deaths in the past. Pregnancies, jobs, visitors, miscarriages, sex of unborn babies before the mom even knew she was pregnant, the list goes on.

But I've always asked with rage and hurt, why? Why give me this and not tell me what it's for, how to use it, or save the life of my best friend and brother? Why?

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 1979

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) I drowned in a 'Young Men's Christian Association' (YMCA) swimming pool and had been declared dead for twenty-plus minutes.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

Did you feel separated from your body? No No

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I heard G-d's voice tell me what to do.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Sort of on this one. Not during the death, but after.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I found out at twelve that I can hear dog whistles, and my ear doctor says I have the hearing of G-d. Apparently, I can hear sounds humans are not supposed to hear. Yet oddly, my brain now has trouble hearing the false pitches of TV's.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes Two angels, mentioned in main narrative.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Two angels, mentioned in main narrative.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Calm peace. To feel happiness, I would have had to have an emotion. Emotions are not possible here. There is no bad, so there cannot be any happiness felt or my mind would have still been in a sense of knowing unhappiness existed. Since I was in G-d's total peace, there was no sadness to be replaced with happiness. The calm peace is not an emotion. It is a state of being with void of all bad. Therefore, without bad, good cannot replace it.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control Yes and I wish I didn't know.

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future Briefly described in main narrative. I don't like it. Why do I see these things?

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate I was a kid. I just had a strong belief in G-D

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No I have been a seeker of truth since two that I recall and from the stories told by family. I have always had a close relationship with G-d. (minus the back-sliding days) and as a child all I wanted to do was to become a nun. Unfortunately as a teen I found out nuns are Catholic so I couldn't be one. I adjusted my life to live as regular person and it has made me miserable ever since. I don't belong in this life. It is not what I was meant to do. But because man had to name a religion instead of having nuns be G-d loving people that wanted to dedicate their lives through a structured entity, I had to adjust.


Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No I have been a seeker of truth since two that I recall and from the stories told by family. I have always had a close relationship with G-d. (minus the back-sliding days) and as a child all I wanted to do was to become a nun. Unfortunately as a teen I found out nuns are Catholic so I couldn't be one. I adjusted my life to live as regular person and it has made me miserable ever since. I don't belong in this life. It is not what I was meant to do. But because man had to name a religion instead of having nuns be G-d loving people that wanted to dedicate their lives through a structured entity, I had to adjust.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes What causes mental insanities. The processes that occur in our brain at all times, and what it actually means when they say, 'his still small voice'.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes People don't like when you see things about them they don't want others to know. At first, they are in a curious shock, then they get scared, then terrified, and look as though I'm scary. That's when I shut up and go away.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes But again I don't know why. I see anything from deaths to what fruit some lady in the store will pick up as she walks to the produce aisle. Or what comment someone is about to say. Or what move they are about to make. Granted this one has actually saved my life a few times since. Apparently, I am magnet for death and have had many very odd occurrences. I also had a time at twenty-one or twenty-two where I was within, according to them, two to three seconds from being brought back. Again, I don't know why I am kept here. I have never done anything extraordinarily with my life.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? G-d's voice and the calm peace. It truly cannot be explained. It has to be experienced.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I was a kid so I told people. I didn't know it was meant to be a big deal. It was just another day for me.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes At three, my middle finger was cut off. It grew back perfectly and has full use. At age three, I had a 106 fever and again was told I'd be brain dead from it. Nope.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It happened. I knew it happened. It meant nothing to me, good or bad. It was just a day. I got all this information, but as a kid, what was I supposed to do with it?

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I have a photographic memory. I remember every detail, even how the tiles in the pool looked as I was going down. I can still see the wavy ceiling from the water rippling as I looked up after I was under the water.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No I don't use drugs. I am an herbalist and try to heal my body through G-d's plants and faith.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Why bring me back? Can anyone answer this?

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? It's fine with me.