Experience Description

This experience happened during my attempt to take my own life. There was approximately 5 to 10 minutes before I began to slow my breathing. I slit a major artery in my wrist and began to slowly lose my life.

The warmth of something infinite began to reach out and absorb me. I went into a deep state of unconsciousness and then levitated over the landscape of the ambulance. The trees were moving. The sky was resplendent and beautiful. Someone told me in a gentle, yet stern, voice, 'It's not your time.'

I then vaguely remember letting go of a hand. I woke up. I was in an ambulance and a policeman was crying, 'He was just too young, so young.' As I instantly awoke, I asked him not to cry for me. The officer said, 'Alright Spencer I won't cry.' I then entered the emergency room and saw lights everywhere. Later I found out that I saw lights that were not there.

I've taken much into account from my experience. Such as: 1) There is a reality beyond our finite mortal state; 2) our mortal condition cannot understand that infinite reality; and 3) Life is precious, don't gamble with it.

Other sensations I've experienced during the duration of that time was numinous understanding, pure indivisible peace, unity of spirit, security, and white light that draws you in with overflowing warmth and comfort.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 10-18-2006 Friday

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Suicide attempt. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function). I suffered depression and attempted to take my life. I'm grateful that I didn't, subsequent to many reasons. Despite forgiving my enemies before I lost consciousness, I would have left all the rest of my life unfinished. Therefore, I am glad to live.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? No I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I had more boundless consciousness of spirit than in my body, which is limited of senses.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? 1:30 pm

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Space-time was much slower and had a sense of infinite meaning.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I wear glasses now.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I hear the same.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

The experience included: Tunnel

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was white yellow and absorbed me. The light was infinite in security and is hard to explain.

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? Some unfamiliar and strange place It had vines that were very green. The scenery looked like heaven with lots of beautiful flowers with light everywhere. I call it 'the great divide'.

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Warmth, heightened awareness, understanding, consciousness…

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I felt a sense of more infinity or a very copious increase in understanding: for example God and the afterlife.

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No No, too vague

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes Meditation

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Catholic

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I'm more peaceful and humble

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I heard a voice I could not identify He said, 'It's not your time.' He was stern although said it gently.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain Already explained . I don't know within what I don't remember.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? Unknown

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Unknown

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? Unknown

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists No

Did you fear death prior to your experience? Unknown

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Unknown

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Not compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Words are symbolic to express thought. That is why they are limited and experience is not in order to understand.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the ex I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the ex

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? God exists. There is life after death.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Family

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I believed it to be true.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It is logical since I experienced this to have it affect my reasoning in a number of good ways and to lead to understanding it to some degree.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Life is and always will be a mystery. We are as destined to comprehend the meaning of life, just as proportionate to death and its meaning.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Not really