When I was about 9 years old, my older brother and his friend were trying to make me faint. They had me stand against a wall while they simultaneously pressed on my heart and choked me. I heard them saying how it wasn't working on me.
But around that time, I left my body and my spirit-form floated behind them. I was looking down on them still trying to get me to faint. My physical body began turning a shade of blue and when they took their hands off me it started sliding down the wall onto the floor. My spirit-form started drifting farther from them and up toward the ceiling. As I turned to look behind me, I saw a figure standing there in front of a cloud-parted 'portal' in the ceiling. He was gesturing for me to follow him. He was wearing a white, flowing robe and had long wavy brown hair but had no face. My memories now blot out his face and replace it with white light, but I recall when I saw him that I felt I had known him forever. I was wrapped in intense, overwhelming love and comfort. As I drifted behind him into the dimension beyond the ceiling, shadowy figures began appearing through this intense white light that surrounded me and cloaked me in serenity, joy, peace, love, and contentment. I became the very essence of all those things. There seemed to be dozens, even hundreds, of figures all around me mirroring this light and love. Two of the figures approached me and I saw that they were women shortly before their faces became visible. One had short, golden hair. She came forward to greet me. The other had short, black hair and she stayed behind the first one. The golden-haired woman talked to me for a long time. But the only thing I have the memory of her saying was at the very end of the conversation. She told me that it wasn't my time, and that I still had many good and significant things to do in my lifetime. She said I was going to do a lot of much-needed good in my World. At first, I recall being very sad to leave and not wanting to leave the comfort of the realm I was in. However, I just as quickly understood that I had a strong purpose to be in my physical body and there was a reason it wasn't my time.
I don't recall being guided back to my physical body. I just remember opening the eyes to my physical body and seeing orbs of light floating all around me. As they slowly began to dissipate, my brother and his friend's faces came into focus. They looked like they were looking at a ghost and both began hugging me and saying how glad they were that I was alive. They then started trying to explain what had happened while I was passed out. When I interrupted them by saying I saw the whole thing, they quickly wanted to hear the entire story. They believed me. However, anyone else I told in my family thought it was a crazy dream and never wanted me to talk about it again. I was treated like I was being disgraced and punished for talking about it, so I learned to keep quiet for many years. When my mother was showing me a family book, she showed me a picture of her mother's mother. When I told her I already met her 'over there' she told me to again keep quiet about that. She didn't believe me for a second. I then visited my great-grandfather some time later and discovered that the black-haired woman I encountered on the other side was his sister.
Date NDE Occurred: 6/20/1991
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes. Life threatening event, but not clinical death.
My brother and his friend were trying to make me faint by pressing on my heart and choking me simultaneously.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I saw my brother and his friend still working on my physical body.
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal When I was up there I just knew everything going on around me without having to talk about or question any of it. I didn't need to, because I felt everything without the need for words.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I crossed over into the other dimension.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Time stopped and lost all meaning.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I was already a very sensitive child, but after this experience, I had a hard time connecting to social circles around me. Everything seemed so miniscule in comparison to what awaited us in the other dimension. Everything began seeming like such white noise and nonsense. I don't see the meaning in much of what our society seems to distract people.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. There was really no hearing, it was just feeling and being.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
The experience included: Tunnel
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes The two figures who greeted me on the other side were my maternal grandmother's mother and aunt.
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes A light surrounded me, that was far more intense than that of our sun, and unlike any Earthly-light can imitate.
The experience included: A landscape or city
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm It was as this Earth calls 'heaven'...for me it was a realm filled with intense, bright, white light and a cloudy un-restricting essence.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Intense love, light, joy, comfort, peace, serenity, grace â€¦
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I felt unable to relate to things I related to before, because so much of the world seemed pointless or corrupt/meaningless in comparison to what we are REALLY meant to get to...which is a point of that perfect peace and love...walking orbs of light and love.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life I was told it was not my time and that I still had many good and needed things to do in my life.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Other Christian
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other faiths- Unitarian and other liberal faiths
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I now know what is on the other side of this life.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin There was a figure in a white robe gesturing me to follow him and rather than speaking with words, I felt his intent for me to follow him.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes The figure gesturing me to follow him was what we describe 'Jesus' as looking like.
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes See response to question 33.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? I was uncertain if God exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I felt this overall reigning being that spilled out light and love onto all the figures around us. We were all made up of the same stuff...all ONE.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I was told I had a significant purpose back on Earth, I felt when I left the other dimension that I knew exactly what that purpose was. However, I have been lost seeking guidance on getting back to that purpose because I have been drifted and pushed wherever this physical realm and life experience has pushed me. I feel like I have been struggling to get back on track.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes My deceased relatives came to be in the other dimension.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I moderately fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes We are love, we are peace, we are all that is on the other side. That is what our soul is made of and that is what we should be sharing and basking in on this Earth. Everything else that has been man made has been to distract from that through boredom, or desires to accomplish or change things, or make a stamp in some way in this world to be recognized and gain power, etc.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? I could not connect to others the same way. I instantly sense when people are closed off or harboring negative energy and it gives me an intense feeling of hurt and pain and grief so I try to stay away from any energy that gives that off. I could not connect to others the same way. I instantly sense when people are closed off or harboring negative energy and it gives me an intense feeling of hurt and pain and grief so I try to stay away from any energy that gives that off.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I am able to connect strongly with others, but I also quickly shrink away from relationships with others where I sense a strong dark or negative energy.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes There is just no Earthly physical description that quite captures the experience to its true extent.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of th I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of th
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I see visions that later occur and get strong intuitive senses about things.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I instantly shared it with my mother and aunt who made me feel guilty and ashamed for the experience, never wanting me to talk about it to anyone ever again.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes When my father killed himself, he came to me in a dream, and was surrounded by the intense light and love. He was letting me know he made it there and not to worry about him anymore.