I suddenly felt myself in a total black-out shortly or at the time of the sleeping injection. I knew this was different because I had undergone many operations in the past. I tried to resist because a terrible vibration shook my throat then my head and my body. I was scared and thought of my young children and something I had left unattended at home. Then I 'heard' a message telling me the more I would resist, the more painful it would be. The message told me to be quiet as nothing was threatening me. I felt a wave taking me to a different boundary/stage (I can't find any fitting word). Darkness was all over me, but it was shining. How to describe that? I am unable to do so. And a message was conveyed to me that I would have to come back to perform a task, though nothing was revealed of its nature. I was feeling extremely well, no pain, no fear, only unconditional Love, a Living and welcoming Presence overflowing me. I felt how linked we all are, living creatures in the universe, that are but a spark of a Power that encompass us and that is also within us. No words were uttered; the message just went into me. The expression 'Voice of Silence' seems the most appropriate. Warmth, watchful and understanding Presence, unconditional Love. Then I was sent back to my gurgling and broken body, and I felt at first that it was very difficult to get back into it. For some time, I seemed to have two bodies, one made from a light material that was struggling to step back into a kind of shell.
Date NDE Occurred: September 1995
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Miscarriage at a very early stage of pregnancy. Important hemorrhage. Life threatening event, but not clinical death 'One nurse let me understand that I had been considered dead during surgery, but I don't have any material proof.'. I was dying, so were saying doctors and I had been sent via ambulance to the emergency unit.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Extremely acute level of consciousness throughout all the experience, something very unusual.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Time had no meaning, nor space.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? The vibration I heard at first was very unpleasant, like many engines roaring together, but it was not deafening, sound and vibration were linked.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes Something like a womb, warm and dark and welcoming. No pressure, a wave that took me to a safe destination.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Darkness
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Fear at first, then bliss, peace, the feeling to be home at last. No word exists to describe what is not an emotion but a state of being.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special Knowledge
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I found myself carried to another state, inside and outside me. I felt I was changing shape or I was losing shape. A kind of wave took me, advising me of what was happening in a message without any word. I was thinking, communicating differently.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No I feel we are responsible for our decisions, and we mustn't feel ashamed of them. They are part of a process towards more knowledge through experience.
What is your religion now? Liberal
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No I feel we are responsible for our decisions, and we mustn't feel ashamed of them. They are part of a process towards more knowledge through experience.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Life is part of a wonderful plan; Love is its stem and unfolds many patterns designed for every single creature of all reigns. Love is everything, personal AND impersonal, whole and enclosed in everything. Consciousness shines in every atom, though of a different kind depending on the 'receiving material'.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I select the people I meet, I refuse to talk about trifles, time is precious and silence is a wonderful gift we need to offer to others, too. People find me easy to talk to and they often confide in me, but I regularly feel the need to protect me from intrusive personalities.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes No words exist : how can they convey the spirit of an experience that is beyond time and space? Any language sticks within the boundaries of time and space.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Magnetism, lamps that worked without being turned on, same for TV that, unplugged, showed blurred images. Computers and electronic devices that are still now suffering from unknown damage.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Unconditional Love, immediate knowledge of what creatures are. The whole universe is alive and conscious. Life is part of a plan, an Order that is Perfection and Harmony. And human beings have received the mission of carrying out this Order.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes A few weeks after, but I noticed that I wasn't able to communicate the whole experience and that people couldn't understand. I just mention it now if necessary, without giving details, I avoid curiosity.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes It seemed very different from the stories I had read in magazines or books before. It was so real and personal and at the same time, it was far beyond the level of our personality.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. I felt someone different and my body was reacting differently. I was confused - I had nobody to speak to, though I tried. I felt all alone in a cold world that wasn't really mine, but I retained that warmth and Love that was pulsing inside me as a Presence, like a reminder, a glowing spark to light my path. Many people noticed a change in me.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. The more I read on the topic, the more I understand. It seems an experience that is still living, a Presence that is alive and alert. When I must make a choice, I feel somehow comforted in it, even though the decision is difficult; I can feel this Presence that provides me a light. And I feel people and creatures in a very sensitive way; sometimes it is unbearable when it's negative and I retreat to a peaceful place.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? My body has changed: skin with a 'glow', extreme sensitivity to natural substances and natural light, acute senses. Some music is just unbearable.