It was a hot August afternoon in Oklahoma when a friend and I were taking a walk to a fast food place. Traffic was clear from the left, so I stepped off the curb and began to cross with the anticipation that the traffic coming from the right would be clear by the time I got to the middle of the road. Unfortunately, as I was crossing and watching the traffic in the far lanes, a speeding car suddenly appeared from my left and mowed me down.
I slammed into the front bumper, slid up the hood, smacked the windshield, flew over the driver's side of the car, and landed on my head. My friend was still standing on the curb and saw the whole thing. She was horrified. I, however, had no idea of what hit me.
I was aware of sudden and intense pain and for some reason I knew I was dying. In my mind, I was screaming for God's help, telling Him I was dying. I felt like I was expanding, like I was filling up with air. I was floating, flying, racing upward. I became nothing but consciousness, if that makes sense. I didn't hurt any more.
Now I am surrounded by a field of blue. It was a luminescent blue like no other blue I have ever seen before or since. On the periphery was a golden glow - I couldn't look right at the gold area, it was just there on the edge of my field of vision. I'm thinking how beautiful this is. I don't really care for the color blue, but this is HEAVENLY. Oh my God, Heaven.
Just as I was starting to figure it all out, I'm starting to realize I'm really dead and I am on the way to heaven, I hear 'Ooops' and I am aware of a pressure on my head. I am now funneled into a pipe. I'm completely in it now; I'm being squeezed, it hurts, and I'm falling. I see it's getting dark and my rapid descent ends with a rude thump.
Now I'm hurting bad and for some reason I feel like I'm on fire. 'Ooops,' must have meant I was supposed to go South. Now I'm screaming over and over, 'I'm in Hell! I'm in Hell!' Actually, I'm back in my body, it's August, in Oklahoma and my lifeless body has been lying on asphalt so hot that you could fry an egg on it.
Go ahead, laugh, you know you want to.
Date NDE Occurred: august 1982
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident. Direct head injury 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death'
I was crossing a four-lane street, forty mph speed zone, and as I was getting to the middle of the road I was hit by a speeding car. The driver was late for a dental appointment. I suffered a concussion and crush wound to the scalp, abrasions and contusions to left arm, torso and leg. Amazingly, not a single bone was broken
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness Throughout.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Throughout.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Now that you ask, I don't think time or space existed or mattered. During my experience, I was just energy with consciousness. I guess you could call it a soul.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. The colors were so bright and unreal.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I wouldn't say I was hearing with my ears. It was more like I was hearing in my head. There were not really any sounds, just my voice/thoughts and the 'Ooops'.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain It was the sensation of being pressed through a tube on the way back down.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain It was not a light from a single point. It was just brightness. Blue like I have never seen before or since.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Confusion at first.
Curiosity about the adventure.
Disappointment, where are my loved ones who are supposed to greet me? Where is God, the tunnel, the light? What about the home movies of my life?
Sadness and Anger. Oooops? Oooops? What do you mean, Oooops? You're God. God doesn't 'Oooops'.
I felt fear just as I was coming to - but it was just because of the asphalt situation.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal Christian/no affiliation
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No Ever since I can remember, I have always been fascinated with Christianity. After shopping around, I finally joined the Episcopalians a few years ago. I don't think it's because of my experience, just finally finding the right fit.
What is your religion now? Moderate Episcopalian
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No Ever since I can remember, I have always been fascinated with Christianity. After shopping around, I finally joined the Episcopalians a few years ago. I don't think it's because of my experience, just finally finding the right fit.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes The most profound impact was in my adult relationship with my mother. While she was dying, she said family members who had passed were visiting her. She said that sometimes they would stand around her hospital bed and other times they would just float around the room and go out through the wall. Because of my brush with death, I guess she felt she could confide in me. It was good to be able to calm her fears, comfort her, to prepare her for her journey, and give her the 'permission' to join them when she was ready.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The colors and physical sensations were like nothing I have ever seen or experienced before or since.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Dreams. Some are prophetic in nature. Nothing earth shattering. Just messages that someone I care about is in need. I have learned to act on my 'gut' feelings.
Sometimes God talks and appears to me in my dreams. Some messages are cryptic, some are very direct.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I had a hard time dealing with the rejection. Why would God be playing head games?
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared this with family soon after the event. They've always thought I was weird. This just confirmed it for them.
It was several years later when I shared my story with a friend. I found out her mother had a near death experience during a surgery. She said there were many similarities between our two stories. This helped solidify in my mind that this was indeed a NDE.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I had read some stories, news magazine about NDE and saw a documentary or something on them. I never really thought my experience fit the typical description.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real Something happened. What it was, I don't know. But I was changed afterward and it wasn't just because of the head trauma.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real After my mother's passing (see below) I have come to the conclusion that I did die. I'm certain. I don't think God called me up by mistake only to send me back. The lack of video reel, welcoming committee, etc. is because it was not my time. God called me up to give me a glimpse of things so I could help others.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No