Nicole Probable NDE

Experience Description

On the 12th of June, I got an operation. Everything was fine when I returned to my room. I had some pain in the belly, but nothing abnormal.

During the night, enormous sweating overcame my whole body. I was drenched! The night staff surrounded me with good care and affection.

In the morning around 10:00, pain started to invade my body. The nurses noticed strong bleeding. Then everything happened very fast. Doctors and nurses bustled about and made me panic at the same time.

Suddenly, at the other end of my bed, I perceived a very tall gentleman (six foot or even taller) wearing a white ‘overall.’ His face was also very white. He was holding a big open book on his left forearm. I wasn’t able to look around. My eyes were attracted by this sweet face and a white that I did not know before!

A kind of soothing calm came over me. This was when the gentleman asked me a question with a soft voice. ‘Who should I inform in case of… ?’ I answered him verbally, ‘inform my parents.’ The nurses told me to calm down, that the names of the persons to be informed had been deposited in my file!

He closed his book and disappeared from my sight. I felt I was in a state of grace.

During each transfusion, I came to, but only for a short time.

In the surgery room, laying there stark naked with my arms stretched out wide, I felt very vulnerable. I was very scared. The anesthesiologist came up to see me. A big sorrow overcame me. I told her that I had not had the time to say ‘good bye’ to my five children, and that I loved them. Then she said that they would do whatever would be possible to get me out of this!

So I gave up, I let go and saw my body as just an envelope! My soul had decided to leave, and I ‘escaped’ through the top. The state of ‘grace’ came back. I didn't see a tunnel, nor any ancestors.

A few days later, I started to feel different. Braver, full of love for my family. Important decisions concerning my partnership began to form.

Before I left for home, I met the doctor and asked her if there was a tall gentleman at my side during surgery? She looked at me strangely and said that no, but she didn't seem astonished and told me that I gave them a lot of fear.

Coming home, I couldn't wear shoes. I needed to feel the earth under my feet! I wanted to feel everything! The soft, the warm, the cold, humidity, grass, pebbles!

Being married to a violent alcoholic, I heard myself telling him what I thought about this situation, and asking him to please leave the place! This without any fear of his crises of violence, as if I had been wrapped in a protective bubble! I was supported by strength and a self-assurance that I didn't have before. My ‘husband’ felt disarmed by so much self-assurance on my side. I was no longer afraid of him.

I asked my five children for a reunion and told them that one should tell each other, ‘that one loves the other.’ I thought this was the reason why I was back at home with those that I loved.

Once I had well recovered, I changed my life, sold my house, bought a sailing ship in the Caribbean and left to sail. During sailing, when I am far off the coasts, I find anew this state of grace!

I still say thank you to life, thank you to this being that gave me this strength, thank you maybe to God. I don't know yet. I have no religion, but I respect all beliefs. I have confidence in life again.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 12 juin 2009

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death' A strong bleeding confined me to bed. The whole medical staff was around me. I had pain. I felt myself leaving. I struggled for life.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I stayed aware all the way through. I didn't lose consciousness. I had no feeling of any barrier, what I would choose would happen in good conditions.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Time seemed to go faster or slower than usual

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Only this state of grace could explain it. Before I was full of anxieties. I suffered, I was afraid. After this encounter, everything became bearable. I was just a soul. My body belonged to science, to cares, to the medical staff, but not my soul!

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. The noise that my state brought about before my encounter was sharp, frantic, and difficult to bear. After my encounter the noises became muffled, hushed, and far away.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? An unusually bright light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was the one coming from the face of this being.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt in a state of grace, a love down to my skin. I felt a soothing light, and the deep wish to embrace my children.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others Everything became very clear concerning the people surrounding me. I have a stronger feeling about the good or bad intentions of other people. People like to be with me. At my side, they feel security and comprehension. I sense the pain of others, as well as their joy and happiness. I feel off-beat about society. I question myself a lot about the human being and its capacity to make itself so miserable! We have everything to feel good about. I discovered the secret: simplicity!

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No Everything happened very fast during the two hours. My only obsession was to understand my unconditional love.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Agnostic non affilien-agnositque

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I am much more open to the world of theology.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Agnostic Dieu est universel

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I am doubtless about religion. I believe more in the human being and its faculties to spread Love.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin He was a man, very tall, wearing maybe a white overall or a white robe. His hair was brown surrounded by white. His features were of great fineness. His arms were big as the book that he held. His voice was soft but very audible, as if he was talking close to my side.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain je ne pratique aucune religions. Mais mon sentiment était mitigé quant à la possibilité d'une telle rencontre, mais tout va très vite ... Ce n'est qu'après que les questions de ce genre se posent.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain cet être m'a donné son Amour et sa Grâce, et je ressentais bien qu'il ne pouvait être humain avec un tel pouvoir

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? I was uncertain if God exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain je ne savais pas à qui j'avais à faire

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists No

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes j'ai "baigné" dans l'Amour et et la Douceur

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life I became very receptive for my surroundings and also for strangers. It is a kind of bulimia to know the world through 'non-organized' traveling! I am more demonstrative to show my love, questioning religions; I am interested in theology nowadays. I feel the future.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I am more direct, but also diplomatic.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience je pense que je pourrai "dessiner" cet être, malgré les années qui passent il reste dans mon cœur et j'en parle facilement. Et mon ressenti est toujours le même des années après.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I already had a great sensitivity for this and that. Today I am still very sensitive, but am better targeted.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The love.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I didn't do it right away, but after becoming aware, I have no problems sharing, but only if the occasions present themselves and with persons that I like.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I felt the presence of this being so strongly that it is impossible for me to deny it. Otherwise I would feel it like an insult.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes The feeling of warm hands on my back when I am worried.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Does this type of situation upset your surroundings?