On the night of my experience, I was attacked by two strangers in a parkland, not far from home. My feeling was that I did not think it was possible to survive. My spirit body separated from the physical body and my consciousness floated up and up and up. At some point, while I was up there, I was met by a female figure. Her presence was the embodiment of pure love. The next thing I remember was descending gently downwards towards my physical body which was on the ground with the attack still in progress. As I drifted back down, I was aware of a silvery cord trailing downwards, stretching back and connecting to the physical body from where I was in my spirit body. The cord had an endless, relaxed quality to it and seemed to be able to stretch infinitely and retract easily. At that stage, I felt peaceful, calm and an acceptance as I was only witnessing, not experiencing what was happening to my physical body.
As a part of the experience, I asked about the nature of reality and why stuff like this happens. It was an urgent question, because I'd reached the limit of endurance to sustain emotional equilibrium regarding trauma, I absolutely could not go on without knowing the answer. I poured everything into it, my focus, my heart and soul, 'Why did this happen to me? What caused it? Was it me? Was it because I was bad person?' Up until then, I'd never truly considered the possibility of judging myself as a bad person.
Then as if overlaid on reality, I was presented with an image of a fractal. As the motion of the curves of the fractal moved inwards towards itself, I saw the faces of each of my friends embedded in various sections of the fractal, and then repeating. I received the understanding that the people we know are somehow attached to our beliefs and in a way - an external representation of our beliefs. I remember thinking, 'Oh, this friend is the mother within me, and oh, that person is the child... ' and other aspects of self.After the experience, I was immediately freed from the fear of death and emotional healing began. I focused on loving myself and looking at each one of my beliefs and teasing and untangling any repressed pain. It was slow and steady, until the day I became freed from any type of emotional pain. I'd also been given an inner connection to an intuitive mechanism which guides my spiritual evolution and within this context, I've experienced many spiritual transformative experiences and events, including communicating and visitations or merging with beings, such as Jesus, Mary, the Divine Mother and Aboriginal Ancestral Spirits.
Date NDE Occurred: 1990
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Criminal attack Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function)
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes As my spirit body returned to my physical body, I could see the attack still in progress. It was as if it was perfectly normal and natural to want to return even though this was happening.
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal It gave me a new ability to see and understand the nature of life and the universe.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I was at my highest level of consciousness and alertness, as I slowly descended down from very high in the sky back towards my body; and when I was viewing the Life Fractal.
Were your thoughts speeded up? No
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No
Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I could see over great distances.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Unknown
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes The female presence seemed to be known by me.
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt extremely calm and at peace as my spirit body drifted downwards towards my physical body.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? No
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others I understood who I was and how my life came to be the way it was and who we are in relation to each other.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? No
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic I was brought up a Catholic.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I now have an internal spiritual focus. My external experience is a reflection.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other or several faiths My spiritual experiences since the NDE have spanned across 3 different faiths/spiritual traditions. Christian - Catholic, Australian Aboriginal Spirituality, and Hinduism. I have an Indian Spiritual Guru: Amma.
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience It was completely new information presented in a mathematical format.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Everyone is connected to you. You are connected to everyone.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin A loving female presence
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes â€¦In the form of a mathematical fractal. Our beliefs can change the images we see attached to the fractal.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Yes and No. Yes, to do with the fractal and all the knowledge that came with it. No, because part of the memory of the experience has been erased.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain But I can't put it into words.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes Immediately after the experience, whenever I thought of 'life after death' or dying I felt good, even excited.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes Absolutely, you can change your life dramatically by living free from repressed pain and an unhelpful belief system.
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Loving myself became the first order of priority upon being released from the experience.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life When my experience occurred, it germinated the seed of spiritual transformation from within. I am more aware than ever before and find it easy to be open to spiritual transformational experiences.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes There was a definite shift. Within two days of the experience, I exited my work and relationship. It wasn't long before new people and more fulfilling experiences came into my life.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain Only in the sense that I did not have names for things, like the fractal and the long silvery cord that was attached to my spirit body as I was returning to my physical body. Since this event, I have 'seen' this type of cord on a friend of mine who passed away from a brain aneurism in 2004. My Spiritual teacher, Amma, showed me a 'vision', where the cord detached from my friend's physical body after Amma gave it a tug. The passing over was completed in an instant and my friend 'happily jumped in Amma's arms'. I felt a lot of peace after this vision.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. This is the most vivid experience from around that time.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I can see an unseen world which overlays this world. While it is energetically finer and lighter in density to our physical world, its topography is similar to this world in that it shares the same trees, rocks, rivers, and so on. I can receive thoughts telepathically, heal, read energy imprints of past and future events of physical locations, be taught directly from nature, dream-share, bi-locate (as reported by others), OBE and receive ADCs. I can remember things like pre-birth memories, being a baby and other lives.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The fractal.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes It was several years until I shared my experience with anyone. I have not talked about it often, but when I have, it was received positively.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain Possibly
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I believed it. I had no doubt that my experience was real.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I equally believe it now. I have had other experiences since that have confirmed and enlarged my understanding concerning what I learned that night.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes The longest continuous experience that was similar was with my Aboriginal Ancestor Spirits, when they gave me a creation story and welcomed me back to the land.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I have a different sort of connection with animals now.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Some questions could have had the added option of Other or Unknown. Thank you.
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