Experience Description

It seemed to be a usual day. I went to work, nothing special happened. My cousin had picked me up to give me a ride to my boyfriend's house (David). I had planned to stay the night. When I got there two of our friends were there to stay also. We were going to smoke some weed and hang out. Shortly after I arrived, David decided he was going to go in the bathroom and shoot up some of his prescription. Keep in mind he was only nineteen at the time. He had been doing it for at least two or three weeks. I on the other hand had never, and had always said I would never. I still to this very day cannot figure out what changed my mind. Curiosity maybe? David had been in the bathroom for about thirty minutes. Our friends were in the living room while I was in the master bedroom of David's trailer and he's in the bathroom. I decided I was going in the bathroom. I remember being angry at him for many different reasons as I was going in there with him. Well seeing as he had been in there for a while he was quiet high, drugged whatever you wish to call it. I remember asking him to give me just a small dose to see what it felt like. And he did. Then I asked for one smaller dose. That was all I said.

It hit my small eighty-five pounds hard. So hard, in fact, when I stood up I fell straight backwards. The friends and David put me in the bed to sleep it off. The two friends went back to the living area while David went back to the bathroom. I was told; later on one of the friends got worried and went to check on me. When she looked at me, she found David shooting me up while I am passed out from before. She threw in a rage at him and looked me over. The two friends determined something was wrong. They threw me in a cold shower to try to slow the drug. It did not work. This is where it gets hard to know what happened. Piecing things together here is what I got. One friend called 911 while the other did CPR, but I was told when the ambulance got there no one was there but David. I was taken to Rutherford hospital DOA ('dead on arrival') is what I was called coming into the emergency room. You know that time they give everything and then they say okay we tried there is no coming back and pronounce you legally dead.

I was told I made that mark and the female paramedic that picked me up refused to stop trying. She continued for I am not sure of the amount time - evidently she could not quit, and it worked I am here. I was stabilized and moved into the intensive care unit. The doctors said it was a miracle I am alive but I was in a coma and they could not explain me being alive. They said I could be in a coma for a few hours, days, years or forever. Also, if I did wake up I could have brain damage or worse for my brain being without oxygen and my heart stopped for an extended period of time. I spent three days in coma before I woke up then two weeks in observation and two weeks in the psyche unit. What I remember is standing up and the next thing I was in this pitch black void, all I could see was a slight appearance of my body with a yellow/gold aura. I felt this overwhelming sense of peace; I cannot find another word that fits better. Kind of like everything has been taken care of and you do not do anything but go along for the ride. There were no lights but my aura. No angels, stairways, friends, no sound at all, absolutely nothing to the point of fear only with peace. I know strange. Nothing but this black space with me right in the middle.

I remember thinking where am I and right when I did (keep in mind this void also had the feeling of no time) it is hard to put into words. I half-way woke up and caught a blur of a female and what appeared to be the inside of an ambulance. Then everything went dark again until I woke up in the intensive care unit and found out what had happened. I am not sure exactly when my heart stopped and I was in the dark place. While I slept in coma the doctors just kept giving me the antidote because they had no way of knowing how much he shot me up with. No brain damage or anything else to say I died and came back physically or mental. But IT HAPPENED. I am eternally grateful to the paramedic. Also, the boyfriend who tried to murder me is long ago out of my life. I also will never forget the feeling of peace; I carry it with me always.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: November 1999

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain AccidentCriminal attack accident on my part after passed out boyfriend overdosed me. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Was depressed had thought of suicide but at time of experience was by no means trying to kill myself.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I would have to say when I arrived in the black void and realized I was not in the trailer to the point I thought, 'Where am I?' and was thrown back here. For days after waking I could not focus and was very disoriented.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Time seemed to not be there or had stopped.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Did not feel like floating but did not feel gravity. I do not see auras on a normal basis. Body was not solid but was not see-through either, kind of cloudy.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. There was no sound in the darkness.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? PEACE, relieved, fear, calm.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal I was in the process of researching religions. All religions.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Liberal still researching. I hold no denomination to any faith. Consider myself a child of GOD.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes The peace seemed to say no matter what happens you will be fine. When I think back I get the feeling no matter what happens here I will always be okay.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain I am no longer so trusting of people who claim to love me.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Only the peace.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes About four weeks I have no problem speaking about any of what happened.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes In researching religion I have also researched paranormal activities as well.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real After it happened I was quiet confused it took at least a month or two for me to piece my part together, the rest was questions and answers from others who were there - that took about two years.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It happened and in answer to my question of fearing death. It was supposed to be.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No