Mary R NDE

Experience Description

As I was on the floor and the blows just kept coming, I held my breath; thinking that my back would stop going up and down and they would think that I was dead or passed out. Just as my lungs seemed on fire and I needed air, my nine month old daughters face came before me and a calm came over me. Then there was a very small moment of total darkness and then I found myself walking upward through an old stone and earth tunnel that had a bright white light at the end. Before I got to the light, the stones and earth turned into the heavens with all of the stars. I instantly knew all of their names and purpose and they seemed as though they were living beings with a reason for being created. One in particular I was told was my birth star. Everything was within a heartbeat yet seemed as if time had stopped. You knew things all at once yet separate as well. There was an angel walking on my right side with me the entire way and I was told he was my guardian angel. I saw my entire life as though I was watching a movie. There was an invisible border you could not see yet you understood not to cross it or you could not leave.

Horses and dogs were playing together and when they stopped, they seemed to stare a hole through me and then went back to playing. I was told they were checking to see if I was the person they were waiting for that they had loved while on earth. Then I saw babies as far as the eye could see and then some. They were ‘our precious abortion babies’ said the angel. But when I told him they were all different ages, he told me you don't stay a baby but will grow to about thirty-four or thirty-six. I was told I needed to get the word in me while on earth because I couldn't approach God in the great Throne Room until a certain level of knowledge was attained. I could learn it there but it would slow down my journey. There were people going up to a group of trees. The leaves looked just like magnolia leaves yet they were about two feet long and more slender. They would grab a branch in their arms and smell with long deep breaths. They were ‘smelling the leaves for the healing of the nations.’ I asked what that meant and the angel then told me to look it up and just smiled when I told him my mom used to tell me that all of the time when I asked how to spell certain words and he said, ‘I know’.

Then the angel motioned for me to go in and an intense sadness came over me, which was so different from the total peace that I felt. Feelings were extremely intense and definite. I told him that I couldn't go in. He couldn't understand why I wouldn't go on in since he kept saying but you don't understand you GET to go in. I then told him that if I went in my babies would never know the Lord and then the angel acted as if he was listening to someone else that I could not hear. He smiled at me and told me that I was allowed to return if I wanted to. The next thing I knew was being back on the floor with the pain and blows. There was an angel that was protecting me and was so enormous that I was the size of a two year old compared to a six foot man hovering over me. He told me his name was Cannon and to be still and he began blowing on the back of my neck and I started getting warm.

A fear came over one man and Cannon pulled him to the door to get out. After I heard the register ring and the bell on the door ring, I wanted to go to sleep. I had lost a lot of blood and could hear the crunching of bone in my head when I moved. Cannon kept telling me to get up and not to go to sleep and I couldn't get up. I remember him telling me to ‘GET UP’ and I would tell him I couldn't. He then picked me up and I remember his hands being the width of my ribcage as he dragged me to the payphone and my left foot was dragging behind me. As he blew on me one last time, I came to and realized that I had been robbed. I had blood everywhere and as I got the dime that was taped to the bottom of the phone, I called the operator and told him I had been robbed and had blood all over. A patrol car was on the way at that time. Apparently, the officers had a visit from an angel that took up the entire back seat of their car and told them to get to me fast because I was hurt.

I still cannot walk on gravel because of the sound that reminds me of crunching bone. I am now seriously attention deficit and on medication and jump when someone comes up behind me. I also am very well known for being able to see angels and demons around a person and can read a person's life as if it was written in a book and all I had to do was read it off. I then give encouragement because of what they are presently going through with the knowledge of what is about to happen to them. It is scary for me because only God knows our future and to be used is a great honor and I take my gifts very seriously. I never did this before my attack. Was I there in heaven? Yes. I wish that I could bottle the fragrance of paradise that permeated the ambulance, my clothes, hair and emergency room for three days. I still stop automatically every time one of the fragrances hits my nose. The other day I got to find out what one of the odors was, it was frankincense.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: January 19, 1977

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Criminal attack My skull was cracked open in 3 places like an egg and dead for at least 5 minutes Two prisoners from early release robbed the store that I managed. I had nowhere to run because I was trapped.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Uncertain It was as if I was the same only in another place. I still retained all of my memories and had full mental ability but wasn't worried about my weight anymore.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Complete awareness of everything and even while in Heaven I had the uneasy feeling that I had been there too long and my babies would need me soon. Sort of like staying at the store too long with the kids not being watched over. I was even aware of myself just like usual, body and all. I still had my same thought process and awareness that I was me.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning It seemed as if I was in another city and needed to get back to my family.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Rushing waters that went through you and not around you. Being filled with intense energy when this happened. The grass made noises as if being alive when stepped on.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes Horses and dogs were playing and running in circles playing chase with one another. I also realized some of these animals had been horribly mistreated and some weren't. I saw beautiful trees, lush grasses, bright blue skies, and rolling hills.

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes Untold numbers of aborted babies, all at different ages, with other children taking care of the tiniest, and grandparents playing with them. The angel with me was personal to me, which was a mystery until I was told he was my guardian angel. He had been assigned to me before my conception and had always been with me and he was proud of me.

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was so bright you didn't think you could look at it but you really could. It made everything and everybody absorb an incredible filling energy.

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I was very aware. I felt the same, but I was no longer sleepy and the pain was gone. Also the pain in my back from a car accident years earlier no longer hurt.

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, no pain, lots of curiosity, lots of questions. There were intense colors, heightened sounds, joy on the faces of the children. I felt worry for the outcome of my children who were nine months, two years, and four years old, respectively. Worry about who would be patient with them because they were so small and defenseless.

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I believe that if I had seen anyone that I knew, like my father, I would not have wanted to leave and my babies would have been victims as well.

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes There was a line that you could not see, yet I instinctively knew that if I crossed it I would not be able to come back. It was at the water’s edge about edge inches out.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I just knew that I could not stay because my babies needed me. I realized that I had made a pact with God at that point to raise them in Church.

God, Spiritual and Religion:


Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes A sadness still haunts me to this day. A longing to die is always with me and at times I wake up in the morning and get so angry that I have to go through another day.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes There is no description for the depth of color or intense imagery. It is hard to explain the sound of grass that is alive as you step on it. Or the energy that goes through you and not around you in the water. There is so much activity going on and so many questions to ask. So many smells all in one yet very separate from one another. There is no word to describe the beauty.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I read strangers like an open book. I foresee future events and what they are going through at the present time. I know when angels are around and even demons and can see them at times.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The worst is the knowledge of how many more innocent babies are aborted daily. The best is that the place is real and one day I will get to go back.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes They always ask me to write a book. Churches ask me to speak and usually I end up calling people out of the audience with a private word from God. It is uncanny and brings them to tears because most people feel that God has forgotten them.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It is now believed that my husband at that time and his girlfriend (I didn't know about her) planned the robbery for the insurance money. The register was crammed full of $30,000. I am now asking God to reveal the truth here on earth and not having to wait until judgment day. I lost so much.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? I also helped to have a Crime Victims Bill adopted into the Texas Constitution that was passed as a Law. At least so many others have been helped.