Prior to my death, I was living in the southwest and traveling out of state for my work. I was out of town at my job. I recall walking down the hallway toward my room, but I'm not sure I actually made it to my bedroom. It was late and I wanted to get some sleep. I had a terrible feeling that something wasn't right but I shrugged it off, it was just a sense of an uncomfortable feeling. I feel someone is in my room, hiding and watching me. I am being held up under my arms and a second person is there. I am being dragged away. For a brief few minutes, the lights went off and everything was so dark. I lost consciousness.
When I became conscious, I was in another place, locked in a room. The room was set up like something you would see in a bad movie. I screamed, ‘I'm dying, you’re killing me.’ I grabbed my chest because I couldn't breathe anymore. Then, I was gone. I was instantly in another place. There were no tunnels, no meeting of dead relatives: I was just dead. In that moment, I knew I was meeting God. My skin was gone and my body was gone. I watched my body go away as it became sound and light. I began to move upward and outward, all at the same time. I was trying to look down at my body lying there on the ground, when an Angel wrapped a beam of light around me and said, ‘mustn’t weep for the body, it's time to come with me.’
My mind was everywhere and it became everything, simultaneously. They told me that I had earned the right to ascend. As I was suspended there in the atmosphere, I could see what I knew was ‘the Eye of God’: that is the way it was said to me. Then off in the distance, I saw what seemed like a giant bird flying directly at me. A blazing golden eagle hit my chest so hard. Its body became one with me, its head was my head, and its wings were my arms. My arms were outstretched and my feet were straight down, crossed one on top of the other. I felt the heat of the experience from this great eagle but it didn't hurt. As this happened, I began to rise higher and higher. Then a pair of hands came through. They were amazing! I instantly knew that they were the divine hands of Jesus. He reached and suddenly I was in his hands. He began moving me, handing me off to the next Master.
I heard exquisite sounds that were all around me and through me. It was like music, but not. There were notes and frequencies; with each note and each blend of frequency, it changed my experience into the next step. I journeyed everywhere. I was taken by one ascended master after another, with each master I was taken into a different dimension. In each dimension, I witnessed ritual death rites of whatever culture I was visiting. I went through Native American, Egyptian, and even some unknown cultures. I not only witnessed, but gathered knowledge of each dimension and culture. Each time one experience completed, another Master would come in and take over.
I was traveling through planetary systems and solar systems, and things called universal grid systems. Just as I would encounter each thing, I was instantly downloaded with the knowledge of its meaning and use. The place I had the most questions about was a place called 'The Universal Healing Center.' It is a grid system. They let me experience it. A part of the process of ascension involves our earthly lives being downloaded into the matrix of creation. The Universal Healing Grid system and the Matrix of Creation are two different things.
I met other ascended people, who were great people in their lives. They had messages of great importance about how they had lived and how they had died. At some point, I began to fall and tumbled backward into a black hole. Everything was thick, dark, and scary. I had the sense of great emotion around me. Something was going wrong and my experience was out of control, somehow. The sense of chaos was strong. Suddenly things were rushing extremely fast. I was experiencing a very dark and evil place with threatening presences. I met a being who said that I was in the experience of Pluto and he would not let me leave. I had to figure out a formula, like a negotiation, for my release back into the light. I must have done it correctly because then I was back in the light with the frequencies and notes.
But I was seated in a chair with a very high back. In front of me was a small desk type top. Behind me was a very tall Angel who told me his name was Metatron. He was cloaked in a deep ruby-violet. He had limbs that were more like light and color than arms and legs. Metatron was my spiritual teacher. He explained in quite a bit of detail how mistakes could happen in a death. He said the journey of death is more complicated and lengthy than humans realize. It is rare, but things sometimes can go wrong. While this was happening, the Masters and Angels stayed outside of it and guided me. The Masters, who had me as their task, had to get divine permission from the council of 7 to intervene and alter my experience, when they considered that perhaps there was more they could do with me than to just keep me on the other side and not allow me to return. While I was seated at the desk, with Metatron behind it, he told me that when I came to them, I was not expected to return. It was my time to stay.
One of my most treasured memories is when Metatron took to a place that was completely dark, not negative just dark. He moved his large wing, which was really more like a limb of light, and as he swept it around he told me to look and I beheld a sight that is so amazingly awe inspiring that words cannot explain it. He told me what I was witnessing is called ‘The Matrix of Creation’. God is creation. Creation is what comes out of the darkness. The light lives within the darkness. It is the formlessness that creates the forms that we are, where we live and the entire universe that we can see and that we can't see. But once I was in the experience, I had so many questions for them for which I was demanding answers, that they were intrigued by my curiosity and determination. They were saying that I wouldn’t be quiet. The tunnel that I didn't experience, but was allowed to see, is actually like a wormhole. There is a technical term for it, but I can't think of it right now. However, this tunnel does exist in our world. The light in or at the end of the tunnel is the brilliance of God.
On the desk, Metatron had me put my hands on a 'sacred text' as he called it. I felt the book. It was made of a substance that wasn't like paper at all, it was much more refined and I could see through the pages. The pages were made of light and edged in gold. The smell was almost a perfume of history and divinity. I was amazed by it. When I touched it, I cried from the overwhelming sacredness it carried. Metatron pointed out some very important passages and entries that were about me. Then he told me it was referred to as the ‘Akashic Records’. We had to go to the council meeting. I was allowed to be in the room, but not allowed to speak or interfere, in any way. During the meeting, the Masters asked for a decision to be over-turned. That decision changed everything. Because of all the encounters that I had had and the impact upon my essence, it was determined that they would attempt an immediate reincarnation.
They turned to me and told me that if I would agree to take on this new contract, I had to understand that I had been dead a long time: by earth time and had already ascended. They also shared with me that they had done this for others before me, but it was a very rare and extreme situation. I would have to be altered. They said, 'Even they could not guarantee that I would survive on earth if they did this.' They told me, 'You will suffer as any human woman who had my degree of traumatic death would suffer, but your healing would be greatly aided and accelerated through them, if you would agree to the terms.' Many discussions went around the council, the Masters. Then they turned to me. Ultimately, I agreed.
The physical alterations were extreme. First of all, I lost my identity. I did not know who I was. I had no memory or recognition of my own family. I did not answer to my name. Over time, I did remember. Interestingly, Dr. Kenneth Ring's book, ‘Heading for Omega,’ was a book I came across approximately three months after and for the first time his information gave me the definition of an NDE. I lost the skin off my arms, legs, chest, and ears. I struggled greatly during the healing of the skin for 3 years after my return. The angel DNA they infused into my body, helped to stabilize the body so it could heal. It was a direct effect of coming back through fire and water in my rebirth.
I came back into the previous body but almost everything else about me is different. Initially, a frequency, that was not human, was inside this body keeping it alive. I was instantly profoundly clairvoyant. I had knowledge of things I never knew or had never studied. I had immediate energy healing capabilities. I was lost in human existence and struggled to understand basic physical living and life as a human being. Everything earthly was disturbingly foreign to me. But all things spiritual were automatic knowledge. I understood the intricate workings of universe and creation, but cried when I could not understand what a shower was or how to work it. The light of day burned my eyes and normal sounds made my head feel like it would explode.
I felt people's pains and agonies as if they were my own. I could hear all thought as if they were out-loud conversations. It took me a long time to realize that I was responding to people's thoughts as if they had said them aloud to me and this frightened them. I had strangers walk right up to me, look me in the eye, and say to me, ‘what are you?’ In my naïveté, I would tell them. That proved to be a big mistake. Today, in my life I work as a Holistic Wellness Practitioner. My body and mind are healed. I am whole. The Angels, the Council and the Masters all kept their word and everything they told me was true.
Date NDE Occurred: August 27, 1994
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Criminal attack. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
I was taken against my will and brutalized by a very dangerous perpetrator. He enlisted the help and compliance of several others.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I could see what people were doing on earth and things they were saying, as I watched. I knew the 9/11 tragedy would happen. I also saw details of an apocalyptic disaster probability.
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal There is no comparison.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? During the ascension process.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
There was no existence of time. I was told that time only exists as a human measurement.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. When one of the Archangels waved his arm and opened the matrix of creation before me, and as I was standing there beside them, as they explained it to me and I was looking right into the matrix: it did alter my vision. Prior to the experience I wore glasses, afterward I could see clearly without them for the first year. Afterward, light hurt my eyes and I wore dark sunglasses: not just in sunlight but indoor lighting as well.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. There were no changes to my hearing other than afterward, for quite a while, I could not stand human sounds. The quality of my hearing is fine.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, but the facts have not been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No I was alive and then I was completely on the other side.
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I met a child who was supposed to be born to my sister but did not incarnate through her because of a life choice my sister had made. I saw a man I had been married to when I was younger who had died in a terrible accident, interestingly he was part Cherokee.
The experience included: Darkness
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? An unusually bright light
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Transcendent shimmering light, but the qualities of the light changed depending on where I was and who was with me.
The experience included: A landscape or city
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I was taken to dimensions where I encountered beings that were non-human. They were very friendly, harmless, highly intelligent, helpful and informative. I don’t really know what it really was, other than to say it seemed to be energy forms of highly advanced intelligence.
The experience included: Hellish imagery
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? There was grief, sadness, terror that I felt coming from others, not myself, when I fell into that black hole. There were also human emotions in the Pluto visit. The experience itself was intense, deep, penetrating, sustaining love, acceptance, appreciation, and support. It was unconditional.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I can't describe this. It is too complex. There just aren't any words that describe it. To try to do so would alter the truth.
The experience included: Life review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
The experience included: Awareness of the future
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? No
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Agnostic
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I'm an ordained minister, non-affiliated. I have daily spiritual practices that I do regularly.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Native American religion I observe and relate to my world more through a Native American perspective, but not strictly. I no longer have to believe in God because now I know God is true and real.
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I guess for me I am so grateful to truly know how real it all is.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I think I live a better life now, I am a much improved human being and I am so grateful that God showed me how shallow and disconnected I was living.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin I encountered numerous beings: Jesus, Mary, Archangels, Metatron.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes I spent time with a very powerful Shaman who was a very important part of my death and rebirth. I also did encounter Joan of Arc and a few other historical figures. The encounters with historical figures were more about the fact that I was passing throug
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes I was taken to some of my past lives and I not only saw myself I could taste and feel the lifetime.
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes When I looked into the Universal Matrix of Creation with the Archangel a universal oneness is easily recognized and evident. It is there in an alchemical process of sorts. An inter- relational unity.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably does not exist
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I did not believe in God before my experience. The presence of God , the forms in which God presented itself to me were undeniable. I wasn't just given information I experienced the information so I would absolutely know it to be true.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I know that the details of my death and rebirth are being watched over and monitored by Divine doctrine. This has continued to be proven to me over and over as the years have passed.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain I'm not sure I can expand on this. I don't recall if I encountered specific info. Regarding the meaning or purpose of earth life .
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes the encounter with the sacred text Metatron shared with me confirmed this to me. Also consciousness is alive and that consciousness will take any of its previous forms and interact with you.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes We are here to fully experience living a human life. We are not supposed to try to alter human life or to over come it we are supposed to live it in all it's forms and stop judging it. Example: we are not supposed to overcome say unhappiness we are supposed to experience unhappiness for what the experience is. What ever you experience in your life you are supposed to collect the experience.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Uncertain Well, sort of. I wasn't told why hardships occur. I was told how energy takes form and then acts thru human existence.
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Uncertain I was shown the alchemical process of love but not given specific info. Regarding love.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life Large changes in my life. I live simply but joyfully. I appreciate all things. I am generally happy. I question everything and I listen. I know how valuable and exceptional life really is. I am very careful about what I feed my spirit and soul. I am very aware of how energy disrupts the body and the life forms we are in, so my choices and decisions are carefully considered before acted upon.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes Marriage ended in divorce. All the people who were in my life pre-death are no longer in my life. My parents and sisters said my experience was too unpleasant for them to want me in the family anymore and they invited me to leave the family: that happened back in '94. At the time, it was okay with me because I didn't recognize any of them anyhow. My grown adult son, who I have not seen since he was 17, at the time of my death, is now 36 and he re-entered my life 4 years ago. We are working on a healthy relationship. However, it is interesting to note that he had a NDE a few years ago and then set out to come to find me. He discusses it with me.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes There is no language that adequately captures the true experience. Also my death experience was very lengthy and deeply involved, with numerous encounters and changes through it all. I came to understand that it happened this way because I was not meant to return. Once the initial decision was over-turned then numerous alterations happened to accommodate that decision and the choices that would be necessary.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience My memories of the experience continue to be vivd. I recall some of the horrific trauma but I remember my death and reincarnation very well.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I am clairvoyant, I have natural healing abilities.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The ascension and reincarnation processes were astounding. I am still in awe of the rarity and the ability of how creation did all this to me. But I can also feel very alone and uncertain of how to express myself, because my experience was so odd. People like very explainable NDE experiences and mine was far removed from the usual and this makes me feel unsupported some times.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes People knew I had an NDE within a short time, but I never shared the truth of the details for many years after. I wrote it all down from the beginning in forms of notebooks and journals, but I didn't trust anyone with the information for a long, long time.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I knew my experience was real, but I could not explain some of the extraordinary parts of it, even to myself. I wanted scientific explanations to validate it all. I read, I researched, I documented, I inquired, I did it all to help myself understand. For a while, I tried to disregard the parts of it that were too extraordinary for others to grasp. But every time I did that, I could feel this surge inside myself as if the truth would not be ignored. If I tried to ignore it or deny it, the truth of it would haunt me until I acknowledged it. So now: it just is what it is.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real These experiences are part of a greater mystery and in a large part are not supposed to be easy to explain or validate. It just is what it is. I didn't make it up, I'm not crazy, and the trauma that caused my death had its own energies but it did not create or affect my death experience. They were two separate things. When the trauma happened and at the moment of my death, I was fully removed from the physical experience and I began my death journey. It was real and choosing not to believe it does not change its reality or truth.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? The encounter with the sacred text, Metatron shared with me, confirmed there is continued existence after earthly life. Also, consciousness is alive and that consciousness will take any of its previous forms and interact with you. I was taken to some of my past lives, I not only saw myself, and I could taste and feel the lifetime. When I looked into the Universal Matrix of Creation with the Archangel, a universal oneness is easily recognized and evident. It is there in an alchemical process, of sorts: an inter-relational unity. I wasn't told why hardships occur. I was told how energy takes form and then acts through human existence. I was shown the alchemical process of love but not given specific information regarding love. We are here to fully experience living a human life. We are not supposed to try to alter human life or to overcome it; we are supposed to live it in all its forms and stop judging it. Example: we are not supposed to overcome say ‘unhappiness’, we are supposed to experience unhappiness for what the experience is.
Whatever you experience in your life, you are supposed to collect the experience. My memories of the experience continue to be vivid. I recall some of the horrific trauma but I remember my death and reincarnation very well. I guess, for me, I am so grateful to truly know how real it all is. I suppose there is an awful lot to share and this is only an outline of my experience, but it's enough for now.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? I'm not sure. But thanks for listening and letting me express at least some of what lives within me. Many Beautiful Blessings, Marie.