In the year of 1995, I was living in Costa Rica with the father of my children. We weren't in a good situation. I believe I over came this stage and the accident made me what I now am, as with any experience in life. I lost many fears.
We had a very serious accident in a car. The vehicle did not brake and crashed into my window. It caused us to fly four metres. At this moment, my survival instinct kicked in, along with my knowledge about crashes. I pulled the seat belt to the maximum that I could. There was a fraction of a second in which my life was saved. In the impact of the crash, I felt my hip go through the roof. My hand was protecting my head. My hip, hand, and head, suffered the impact in that sequence and with the same intensity.
Next, I saw what looked like doors of steel, like a mandala that opened before my eyes. I looked more closely, and they weren't made of steel but of pure energy. I found myself in a place where everything was light and information. Never had I been so totally loved. I realized that I was part of this light. I asked, 'Where am I?' I didn't realize that I had made a sound. Some one, at my side, answered in a very bad way.
At that moment, I returned to the source. As an artist and sculptor, I found it strange that there was no horizon. I remained there a long while, until I heard a voice that had a Peruvian accent. I spoke to him with instructions to call my sister to warn my children. I knew that through the scene of the accident they were sure that I wasn't there. My children had recently learned that I was in an accident, and they still could not get me out of the car.
After all this, I was sitting in the light for a long period of time. I heard metallic noises. They were cutting through the car to retrieve me. I couldn't see anything. I felt the brace that they put under my head to make me immobile while extracting me from the car. Once in the ambulance, I knew that I was dying. I heard the voice of a paramedic saying to the two others, 'I should stay with her, you two should go to the husband and make sure that he closes his mouth.' My husband, at the time, was very frightened and reacting badly. This happened whenever I collapsed from low blood pressure. I have always had this condition, especially as a child. My blood pressure would fluctuate like the hummingbird, between dying or to returning. I don't remember how this paramedic stabilized me. I remember nothing more. When I awoke in the clinic, the light around me dissolved into the atmosphere. I knew that this light is that which unites the whole World. It was Love and information. Even now, I sometimes raise my eyes to heaven and I can see fragments of the light and it soothes me.
I had a broken hipbone. My right hand was totally smashed with injuries that looked like the bone was coming through the surface. Fortunately, the muscles that made up my hand stayed beneath the bones. For the doctor, the most worrying thing was my hip and that they couldn't stop the blood from clotting. When I left the clinic, I was on anti-coagulants medication for 15 days.
The doctor told me that I would be in bed for two months and it would take me another month to learn to walk again. My mother, on hearing that I was in an accident, flew to be with me. I asked the nurse to bring me a wheelchair, so my mother wouldn't know how badly I was hurt. The nurse would not let me do this.
Then I returned to Peru and began seeking information. Needless to say, it was generally due to my great imagination as an artist and Anita Moorjani's book that has been very therapeutic.
In 1996, I resumed recording my dreams and writing them down. I also began drawing again. I read a large amount of Joseph Campbell at this time. Finding in those pages, frequent similar themes and names, that I had given to a sculpture. I thought that I had experienced universal myths that were within the human brain. He called the people Nomads of every ethnicity.
Then began the search to verify what had happened to me, where had I been? Someone showed me an account of a man that had this experience of death. It was like Anita's experience with cancer. The nurse cared for and showed kindness to him. When they declared him as dead, she took him to the morgue. This man had no family so nobody came to claim him. The nurse went back the next day to dress him. She was shocked to see he was alive and that he was also cured! I have tried again to find this information, but I have lost it, this account indicated several different states of living for this gentleman. During his stay in what I call the source, he used similar names that are themes that I used, like 'He Himself', 'Logos', 'Anamnesis.' He described the light like the endless river.
I experienced the river, where it took me and several others. At the time I was immersed in this light, they filled me with information in images, which came to me unconsciously. I felt there only remained threads in my hands. My hope resides in the Emptiness. I knew I wouldn't find anything in a full room, and that I would have to leap into the emptiness.
Currently, I am going through another new change. I am moving to the Peruvian jungle to do art work, but along the way I became involved with ecology, I always advocate for life because if the standards of ecology fall, money won't help at all. Values are changing, money is only a medium to connect with another. Money is one more tool and not the primary value. Then the book 'Biology and the belief and the change of beliefs' by Bruce Lipton, came into my possession. This along with Tom Campbell, who is a quantum physicist, has given me the certainty of this. As always, being very perceptive, I feel the need to make this scientific. Thanks to these two scientists in Physics and Biology, both arrived at the same conclusion, without having to have experienced any situation like the one that I had. One thousand thank you's to Anita Moorjani for writing her book.
Date NDE Occurred: junio 1995
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No. Accident
How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I was listening to the people around me when I wasn't submerged in the Source. Then I stopped giving them attention until I heard noises of levers and braces. I again paid attention to them. It was as if they were trying to widen the braces of the car to get me out. I felt it when they put me below the level of the stretcher.
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I realized that I could talk and they could hear me. Although I couldn't see, I listened to those around me, and around the car. Hearing was for me the last thing I lost. But I could be mistaken.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Time doesn't exist where I was.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I had the vision of love. It made me change as a person. Although it wasn't immediate, the change continues and is constant.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. At the moment of the experience, I was able to listen to all around me. If I paid attention to them, not just to the people next to me, I couldn't see. I now know that I had to continue talking to the people that came to the scene because I believe that hearing is the last thing you lose when going unconscious.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes The light was as if one was in a womb or a space which didn't have a horizon. I was part of this light, which was love and knowledge. It was like everything was there inside it.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm It was pure energy, Light Love and knowledge. I was part of it.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I was at peace except for the concerns about my children. Personally, I had no fear. The peace and love were unimaginable.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe The only thing that exists is this light. When I awoke, this same light melted into the atmosphere. In that moment, I thought that this was the glue that unites us to all of the universe.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No I don't know. I went through a severe family crisis and everything came apart. If I look back, everything acquires a feeling of searching and of direction. The question is, if this experience gave me the tools to proceed with my life or not, and I am unable to answer this question.
I cannot judge the reactions of people. I don't really maintain bitterness towards him. It has to do with my children, both were broken in this situation.
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? No
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic No soy practicante católica
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I no longer see God away and to one side, but now, I view God as within everything and in each one of us.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Christian- Catholic No soy una practicante católica ni antes ni ahora.
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I was searching before on the subject of uniqueness and never found an answer. Everyone is ONE. A person in front of me is part of this LIGHT. This I didn't understand as clearly as I now do.
But as much as I know about the experience, I believe that unconsciously they informed me of facts. Little by little, I have been singing and learning about myself and others, sometimes with pain, sometimes with happiness, but both are part of the same experience.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes The certainty that the only thing a person has is their energy. All the values of possession upon which life was based on, life changes. Everything is different.
I thought that I was a person who understood life and art was so important to me. While in the light, there was no hint of any sculptures or art. They simply didn't exist. All that existed was this other that was there, and I was part of it.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain No durante mi experiencia , pero si creo en la reencarnación.
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Everyone is ONE. This light was everyone and everyone was part of this Light.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I call it the Source; others might call it God. But one is part of God or of the Source; we are a chunk of this love.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I felt that something for which I had come to do in the World, isn't over. In other words, I had to do it better.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes But I never had verbal communication with anyone. It was just a sensation of Love and knowledge that I felt. I don't know if that which developed afterwards was a product of this or of my own searching.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes Just the certainty that I am a part of this light, and that I will return to it.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Unknown
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes To be born is to die; it is part of the infinite river of flowing energy.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Uncertain If everyone is one, everyone travels together. It is sad that if something very bad is happening to one person. There is also someone that is accompanying you by your side, or what happens is that we haven't given it enough attention.
Or that we are not on the right road.
But I never had verbal communication with anyone. It was just a sensation of Love and knowledge that I felt. I don't know if that which developed afterwards was a product of this or of my own searching.
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Real love is the capacity of compassion. It is measured by how much you have for yourself and to give to others.
I don't understand the mentality of owning another. Nobody can possess anyone, they can just accompany them.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life I try to improve life for myself and for everyone. It doesn't necessarily end up as I have planned because I believe that nobody can interfere in the life of another. We can show them the way if we are asked, but it is their choice because every life is personal.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes My relationships have changed, but as I have previously mentioned, this didn't happen all at once. It has been a long road of learning, and continues to be so.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Nobody wants to hear you talk about death, in the first place because they say I suffered a reaction to liquids in my brain.
It was only when I read an experience of a neurosurgeon that I could deny this lie. NDEs are real.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. At the moment of the accident, I was in a very painful situation with my family. This experience made me stronger.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The being that is part of this light, is like an entity. I felt it 'think' (if that is the correct word) but not thinking the way we think. It was in fragments, if I could describe it this way. But this light thinks ALL, it is ALL.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I have told a few people, but I prefer not to talk about it with people, unless they have had a similar experience. I feel good talking with experiencers.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I have been on a larger search, currently in Quantum physics, and Biology. Both books by Bruce Lipton and Tom Campbell, have given me the certainty that scientifically this experience is real. Being a person that always was so perceptive, I continually search for scientific explanations.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes A little after my arrival in the jungle, it was completely night time. I still hadn't made the walls of the second floor. I was sleeping under a mosquito net. Suddenly a light awakened me. When I sat down in the bed, I saw that all the jungle was a single light. I thought that it was the Moon, and that this phenomena would happen again. But from that moment it has never repeated itself, and not only did I see it, but also a person I was working, with saw it as well.
It made me remember the light of the Source. It was all so beautiful! The plants appeared to talk among themselves; it was like a heartbeat of light.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Sometimes I ask myself why people don't listen more to cases of this type because the World would change a lot.
I never saw anything during the experience. I just felt this entity of light to which I belonged, then I developed many works with the same names and themes of an experience that I had read about. These works were made before I read the document, works like Logos, Anamnesis, The Mind, The He Himself, The Infinite River and several others.
During the last years I have dreamt in English, you don't dream in another language, that isn't your own, I understand, I speak it, but it is not my language, I have everything recorded and drawn, it is, in one way, complete, I have let them go, they also agree with my work. Dreams are, for me, a means of searching, there is no fear, or judgement, it is said I am able in desperate situations, to not be afraid, I just question myself about them. The dreams from Anamnesis are concerned with water levels, which are always rising, in reality it has been four years of these dreams and has been a long time.
I ask myself today, after reading Bruce Lipton and Tom Campbell, if we have internal information, as we are part of this light.