It was nighttime, between 10pm and midnight in my rented apartment. I was with one of my roommates, who is also Venezuelan. We were celebrating the fact that we were going on a two week vacation to Venezuela the following week, so we got a bottle of Vodka and poured it all into a pitcher of fruit punch. We started playing blackjack on the floor of our living room. The loser of each game would drink half a cup of the vodka fruit punch. I considered myself a pretty good player, but somehow I managed to lose almost every hand I played that night. I was baffled since I've always considered myself to be a very lucky person. Anyways, after a couple of hours of playing and losing, as you can imagine, I was pretty wasted since I had practically drank the entire pitcher by myself. I was so dizzy that I couldn't stand up, so I tried crawling back to my room. Even crawling, I kept falling sideways. I thought it was hilarious since I've never been that drunk or dizzy before. So after rolling and crawling like a soldier, I finally made it onto my bed. As soon as I laid on my bed, I felt the roof and the entire room spinning. I lowered my right hand to touch the floor to see if I could stop the spinning, but it didn't work. I was very dizzy and I closed me eyes but everything was still spinning. After a while, I guessed I passed out because the stress that I was feeling about the spinning room went away.
Suddenly, I found myself floating in empty space or an empty void. I felt like I was floating on water, except that it wasn't water. I was floating in what felt like pure LOVE. I also felt like I was slowly drifting, as if being pulled somewhere. The feeling of pure Love that I felt surrounded with was amazing. It was nothing like any love I've ever experienced since. I don't think that kind of Love is available in our physical body and reality because it's very hard to describe. In my experience, it is indescribable, but since then I realize why people don't come or don't want to come back from physical death.
Anyways, I was floating in that wonderful bliss in the middle of nothingness when suddenly I felt something hit me on the back. It felt like being hit by a tennis ball. Then I felt like I was being pelted by these light balls from all directions as in the ATARI game 'ASTEROIDS'. I kept blocking every shot from all directions. I remember doing this for quite a while because I was getting really exhausted. I didn't know how long this torture was going to keep going, but I knew that I was about to give up.
Suddenly, I looked up diagonally and I saw a small BRIGHT STAR in the distance. Then the torture stopped and that blissful feeling of pure Love and Peacefulness came once again over me with much delight. I didn't want that feeling to leave me again; it's like being engulfed in a blanket of pure Love. I saw the STAR approaching. I was intrigued and I tried to focus on it since I could see like there was someone in the middle of it. As the star was getting closer, I did notice someone. But it was strange because this person was wearing the same clothes that I was. The Star stopped about 20 yards from me and I could see a small version of myself from within that star. I frowned because I was confused.
I asked, 'Who are you?' Seconds later, the Being whom I thought was a small version of myself replied with a very STERN, STRONG FATHERLY/GODLY ECHOING VOICE, just like you would imagine God's voice sounding like. This really shook me down to the essence of my core. I realized there and then that this was no dream, illusion or anything else. This was an ultimatum by someone very powerful. I knew this because it wasn't my inner voice that I heard nor any voice I've heard before or since. This Being said the following and I quote, ' WAKE UP OR YOU WON'T.' I knew this was an option that he was giving me. I remember thinking that I wasn't ready to die. My mom was waiting for me in Venezuela and she needs me. So as soon as I thought of this, the star started backing away to where it came from.
The light balls started hitting me once again from all directions. At that moment, I started freaking it out because I realized that if I didn't wake up soon, I was as good as dead. I remember trying to open my eyes and feeling them trying to open. But they felt like they were glued shut. I was in full panic mode at that moment and I tried with all my might until I suddenly snapped my eyes open and sat up on my bed. My heart was beating fast and my entire body was shaking. I couldn't stop the shaking. I took a couple of deep breaths to see if I could slow down the shaking, but it got worse. On top of that, my saliva was so thick that it felt like I was chewing gum. I needed water, but I could barely move.
I didn't think I could make it to the kitchen in my condition, so I crawled to Eric's bed and woke him up. He was scared after seeing me shaking. I asked him to hit me to see if I was dreaming or not. He was really scared at that point. He asked me what was happening to me. I replied, 'I don't know, Slap me!' He did and I knew I wasn't dreaming. I told Eric to bring me water because I was having a hard time swallowing and breathing. He brought me water, milk, and juice. No matter how much I drank, it felt like I was drinking air. I felt like my time was up, so I told Eric to dial 911. He was reluctant because his English wasn't good enough. I told him to call and just say ambulance and that's it. He called and then hung up. 911 called back and he said, "ambulance."
Minutes later the ambulance came and they checked my pulse and said that I had low pulse. They pulled me up and I felt very nauseous. I told them to take me to the bathroom because I felt like vomiting. I vomited all the vodka fruit punch that was in my system and then my body stopped shaking. My pulse became normal and I felt much better. I had no insurance so I decided not to go in the ambulance. I signed a release form and off they went. It was around 3 a.m. and I was now lying thoughtfully on the living room couch. I was tired but I didn't want to go to sleep because I was still thinking about the warning. I was scared that if I went to sleep that I wouldn't wake up again. I resisted my sleep as much as I could until I saw the sun brightening outside. Then I gave up from exhaustion and slept like a baby.
It was strange, but after that day, I lost my fear of dying or of questioning if there is life after death. I now know that we, our true self, doesn't die, only the physical body does. I understood why we don't want to come back once we feel that amazing Love, but I felt it wasn't my time yet.
Date NDE Occurred: July
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes
I had alcohol poisoning, which is what caused my NDE and the beginning of my spiritual search for answers.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing
Did you feel separated from your body? No
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness. It wasn't. Although the only difference would be the feeling of complete and pure Love that surrounded me, but I know that this is what you usually feel when you're in that place or state of consciousness.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I saw The Star.
Were your thoughts speeded up? No
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning.
There was no time, there is no such thing.
Were your senses More vivid than usual? No
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I was floating in the Void/Darkness prior to my higher-self experience, as I like to call it. I guess floating in a warm pool but without trying to stay afloat is what it feels like and even though is dark, I could still see distance and all around. It's not like physical Darkness where you can't see in front of you. You can see, there is just nothing there to see unless they/it shows itself/themselves to you.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It's the same. I had no problems hearing. I heard the lights pelting me and my complaining about it. I heard the star very sharply. His voice really echoed through my Being. It was really powerful: I heard that loud and clear.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Darkness
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an Unearthly light? Yes It was a Star. There was a Being inside the star. I say inside the star because the small Being wasn't glowing, but the star was and it wasn't blinding.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm. I was floating along in nothingness. I was in space but without stars, planets or anything. It was like a warm, loving ocean and I could see distance but there was nothing to see. I never felt scared or lonely. I was just enjoying the feeling and the experience. I could have floated there forever.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? A peaceful Love, like an ocean. It was everywhere around me and through me. I was a part of it. It's really hard to explain. Then came the annoying non-stop light pelting me. Then again, the peacefulness when I saw the star. Then I felt panic after it left.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others. I understood that we don't truly die, at least not our true self. Only the physical vessel/body dies. There is a heaven but we don't get there right away, we must go through readjustment. It's like starting a job. I was guided until I understood how to perform my duties. We're all one. Imagine God as an octopus, each tentacle is a life and there's an unlimited number of tentacles and each tentacle is different but they're all part of the one except that God is not an octopus. Everything has an answer.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life. Well, I didn't go anywhere. A Star came to me and gave me an ultimatum. I didn't feel that it was my time to go, so I made a conscious decision to come back. I fought back to continue this journey.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Religious unaffiliated. I've never believed in religion, but I consider myself to be spiritual. I believe in God, heaven, and in the two forces of good and evil or light and Darkness. But I don't believe in the religious sense. The God I believe in has no name, shape, sex or vanity to being worshiped. It is none of the gods found in any Bible. Heaven is whatever you want it to be, that's why it's perfect for everyone. I believe in energy and free will. We're all one anyways.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I believe less in religion and more in spirituality. I am more intuitive and in tune with energies. I don't pass judgment as easily as I used to. Many religions and religious people pass a lot of judgment, that's why I'm less religious than ever before.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Religious unaffiliated. I have no religion. I feel religion is a form of brain-washing and I like my godly gift of free will. I consider myself to be a spiritual being.
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. Well, I didn't see a religious figure, pearly gates, a tunnel, deceased family members or flying Angels. But I did see a Star with a Being in it which is nothing that I've ever heard off or seen anywhere. I did hear a godly voice though. And the feeling of pure Love! I've never heard of that before anywhere. I always imagined death or near-death to be painful or traumatic. But now I understand why they say rest in peace, because it doesn't get better than that.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Loss fear of dying. I realized that life is a school or a playground. I learn not to hurt others. I learned to forgive, love more often, and not to pass judgment. My new powers should not interfere with others' free will. I can do whatever I want. Knowledge is power, but of enlightenment not of power over others. We are immortal; there is a god; there is life after death; we live many lives.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin. This Being chose to look like a miniature copy of myself and I knew it wasn't me. When it spoke, it was very strong, powerful, commanding, mighty and godly. That voice made me realize that it wasn't an illusion or my inner voice. This was real. The vibration and the sound it was very fatherly, stern, and godly. Like I said, it's what you would expect a god to sound like or someone of great power.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes We are part of it now, we're just not conscious to it. I can describe it in one word "LOVE."
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes It's a feeling of knowing that we're all one. It's hard to explain, it is something that must be experienced. It's like describing what sex feels like to a virgin, you can describe it in many ways, but they'll truly understand the feeling once it is experienced.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I can't say yet.
Did you believe that our earthly lives Are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes Yes, it's a school. We're here to learn.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists. Yes There was a Star being with a very powerful voice unlike any voice I've ever heard. The fact that I was given a choice is proof enough for me. There was no reason for any star or star Being to make itself known to me and then warn me of my impending life decision. He or it could have just left me alone and allowed me to die. Also, the experience of floating in an ocean, like essence of pure Love, is quite amazing for me. If that's how dying feels, then I can't wait to feel that again. That's why I lost my fear of dying, it's amazing.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives Are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Not compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Yes. It's everywhere, it's everything, it's alive.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life. I became more in tune with energies, more aware of psychic powers, more sensitive to things, more fearless, wanting to know more about the Unknown/the occult, secret knowledge, anything new age, ETs, science, biology, energy, mankind, history. A sense of knowing and understanding but of restrictions too. I understand patience, duality, and free-will.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes All the people that I had wronged and cheated in my life, I made it my mission to go and apologize to all of them. After doing so, I felt a heaviness lifted from my soul as if I had paid my karma. Now I have no more enemies or people that dislike me. I now try to see both sides of any argument and not pass judgment. I am not here to judge but to experience. I've become a better person with greater understanding and knowledge. I've become more psychic and ready to help others as best I can.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The feeling is like none other experienced here on earth or the physical realm. We don't have the words to describe it, it is something that must be experienced to be understood.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. How can you forget an experience like that? I remembered everything, especially the feeling. The vision of it all is burnt into my memory. Only Alzheimer's will temporarily take that away from me. The feeling is so unique that only someone else who has experienced it can relate to it. It's like asking an astronaut what it feels like to float in space or walk on the moon. Only another astronaut can relate while the rest of us can only imagine.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I can connect telepathically with a Loved one. I see when a known person has passed away. I'm able to receive messages from higher sources, I can wish things into reality, I can sense energies better, I can play with energy. I know how to protect myself from unwanted entities.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes, the sudden knowing and understanding of things.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes The next day with my roommate. They react the same way everyone does by saying that it was a hallucination. No, they were not influenced at all. And that is fine because I now know more about everything than ever before and I can tune into things that others cannot or aren't aware of yet.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. It was very real because I felt a Love like none ever felt before on earth. I saw a Being that I've never imagined or heard of before. That voice shook me to my core was undeniably powerful and godly like. The whole experience is something that's unforgettable. And the loss of fear is quite liberating and not only that, but the abilities that I now have are undeniable to me and I really don't care what others think because I now know what is true and what awaits me once I'm through with this life. I am better prepared for other experiences.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real.
Since then I've had many other unique experiences. During my years of spiritual knowledge and searching for truths, I met a Brazilian couple who were teaching metaphysical studies and in a class of 10 students (me included), she proceeded to reveal her past lives to us. When I mean reveal, I mean shape-shifting right before our eyes. She had long brown hair and was in her early 30's. Her hair grew shorter and she became a bearded man, then an old lady and she did this five more times. I couldn't believe what I was witnessing, but that was definitely the living physical proof of some things that are otherworldly. This was corroborated by the other 9 students.
As I continued searching for more knowledge, I met Archangel Gabriel in a dream. I didn't know he existed before this. He warned me about something that I was doing and I heeded his warning. It was funny because when I saw him in my dream, he introduced himself as Archangel Gabriel, not just as an angel but an Archangel, I still do not know the difference since I'm still not religious. Then I met Archangel Rafael. I didn't know he existed either. I also met Michael and Gabriel again in my second NDE which I will describe tomorrow when I fill this questionnaire again.
I've also seen my younger sister appear to me in a dream before my mother told me she was pregnant with her. Again I saw my best friend's son in a dream months before he got his wife pregnant. They were unable to have kids until I told him to say something while he was trying, he did and now he has a beautiful boy.
I see stars every time someone I know dies. So when I see stars, I start calling family members and asking about who's passed away. Then I know who it was that came to say their good-byes to me.
I've tried astral projection and I had my first encounter with a shadow-being. 've tapped into other dimensions/realities and I've learned a lot since that first NDE. I feel very enlightened and I try my best to enlighten others and provide them with answers and live a nonjudgmental life where I do my best to show love and understanding to all. I understand the why of many things but I'm still attached to the ego which it's quite hard to detach from, but that's my next step to accomplish before my next life. I hope I can help others in their search for meaning and enlightenment.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes My second NDE which I will describe tomorrow.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I highly recommend it, but I guess we'll all get there in the end.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Meetings. I would like to know if there are others like me in my area. I mean with similar experiences or others that would like to learn from my acquired knowledge.