Experience Description

I don't remember much after I woke up in the ICU but I never forgot this. I had a minor operation under general anesthesia. After they put the tube in my throat, my larynx started to spasm and experienced acute hypoxia. On arrival to the emergency room, I was intubated and manually ventilated with an oxygen saturation of 80 and with a blood pressure reading of 50 over 40. My heart stopped briefly.

This is when I experienced looking down at myself and watching myself being resuscitated. I felt very warm, happy, and safe. A deceased person with whom I was very close to was there with me. He looked at me in a loving way. I wanted to stay with him and didn't want to leave him, but I was being sucked closer and closer back towards my body. Every time I tried to resist the pull, he looked very upset and told me not to resist. He kept smiling. That's all I remember.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: August 9, 2016

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No. While under general anesthesia Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function)

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I saw doctors working on me. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness It was actually frighteningly very clear.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was being pulled back into my body.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I could see completely clear, and I normally have poor vision.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Hearing was extremely acute.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain It was similar to a tunnel, quite hard to explain.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My grandfather

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes When I was with him.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Happy, but sad when I was sucked back. Obviously, I am happy to be alive now.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I had a glimpse, like a video flick, of happy moments in my life, while being sucked back.

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life I decided to stop resisting being 'sucked back.'

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Jewish Atheist

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I believe there is life after death.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Moderately important to me

What is your religion now? Do not know The experience has altered my thoughts on afterlife

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I never believed in anything until I had this experience.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes It has changed the way I look at life.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin I saw my grandfather who had passed away.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes The experience left me believing this.

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably does not exist

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? I am uncertain if God exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably does not exist

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes I saw my grandfather suggesting there is life after death.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I did not fear death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Not compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

Were you compassionate after your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life I never believed in much before my experience. Now, I question my beliefs.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain Not sure

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I am now questioning if it was a figment of my imagination, drugs, or, if in fact, there is something more after death.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. Extremely accurately, I will never forget it.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Seeing my grandfather.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? No

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably not real I wanted to believe it was a figment of my imagination until I found out that my heart stopped and the number of doctors in the room was the same as I could recall during my experience.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I would have never known the number of doctors because I was clinically dead.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? This just happened three weeks ago. It is still haunting me but I feel so grateful to be O.K.