Experience Description


I was so afraid to die. I was afraid of the pain I thought I would feel. Then I heard the doctors say, oh Lord we're losing her! I then felt a pulling whoosh up and then was at the ceiling watching it all! I felt no pain at all. I did, however, feel the fainting-sick feeling you get before passing out and I felt light and heard a buzzing noise. I then watched the doctors working on me. One of them was swearing terrible. I remember thinking, good Lord he (God) can hear him! I was embarrassed for them all in the emergency room.


I then went up but don't remember moving. I just was in a really beautiful meadow of sorts, trees, stream, fish, grass, etc. Then I was in a place of the most beautiful silver-white color that's the best way I can describe the color of this place! The feeling was one of utter joy and love! I mean real complete love. Not of this earth. And peace, such peace! People were all around but I couldn't tell you who they were. For some reason it wasn't important, the path I was going down was important. Everyone was so happy to be with me. When I got to the final place on the way down this path, I knew I couldn't go any further if I wanted to go back to my life.


I remember all this just as if it had just happen up there, completely. Everyone was talking at once, so happy! I remember asking so many questions. The first was, how do I know you are Jesus? With my not ever seeing his face, he held out his hands. I saw a pair of completely spotless white, I mean clean, hands, except for a light red streak mark up towards the palm wrist area. I saw really white clean flowing clothes on him but knew if I looked in his face I couldn't go back. I remember asking tons of questions and getting the answers.


He and all the others there said I could stay but it was just too early for me to be there. I said, pointing down, look I've got real trouble down there! He has been beating me up for years and following me everywhere. I can't get away from him. Then he said something I can't remember - no that's not the right word, it's as if it's on the tip of my tongue, but I just can't spit it out! Anyway, I then said, I don't want to leave here. It's so peaceful and lovely and I want to stay! I then thought of my nine-year-old daughter and what would happen to her if I didn't go back. He showed me things in her life and mine to come. All this 'talking' was pretty much through or minds, although we could use or mouths but why do that when it isn't necessary.


I made the immediate decision to come back for my daughter. I am a comical person by nature so everyone was laughing and said I kept them all laughing up there! Anyway, I asked jokingly what's in it for me? Will I be in awful pain? He said, pain, yes. But you'll have help with it. I said, will I ever be safe from him? He said yes. I'll give you (whatever) to make it all ok! I said, will I ever find a person you meant for me to be with? He said yes and he'd be wonderful. He'd send him when I was ready. He was already here for me but I was to get all my troubles straightened out first so as not to put them all on him! Laughing I said well he better be cute and he said you two will find each other irresistible because I put you two together a long time ago up here.


I thought I'd find him waiting for me when I got back to earth. (As it happened, I just seven months ago found him!) Anyway, I then said my goodbyes and after all that he said, I had much to do down there pointing to Earth. I said, what can I do for you; you've given me so much? He said lots I can't put my finger on, but when I complete something I was to do, I would know that was one of them! He mainly said, tell people of all this in those words. Just tell them. Most will listen, and some believe, but that's not important. When they need to remember it will help them. I remember saying when it's my time will I be able to come back here? And laughing they all said, of course! I then said ok and whooshed down for lack of a better word.


I was now back over the gurney watching the doctors work on me. I saw everything, heard everything and whooshed back into the body looking back to heaven but couldn't see them any more. Then I opened my eyes and told the doctor I'd be fine now. 'I told God I wanted to come back and he said it wasn't my time.' They all froze! He then said I was being intubated for my lungs and that he works on earthly things. I took his hand and said, 'Doc, we all heard you up there swearing your head off trying to revive me! You embarrassed me talking like that and I promise you I'm not going to leave again. I have work to do yet.'


Then they intubated me and gave me something to ease the pain as the tube went in. A few minutes later I came to and motioned for pen and paper. I then started telling the place I'd been. People came from all over the hospital to read what I'd written! I didn't know then that not everyone would want to hear it! The nurses sent a priest to help me deal with being on this plane again, as they called it.


I told every one I could for many years. I still tell people. I almost have to and need to. Also I got a divorce and never looked back. It was as if I couldn't even see why I was frightened over it all! My life is so different since it all happened. I'm awfully sensitive to all drugs, can't even have a glass of wine. I'm super sensitive to lots of things. Emotions are everything to me, I actually feel people rather than guess as to their character. I can tell a bad person just by seeing them or over the phone or in a store! I don't hear voices but I do feel guidance from the angels sent back with me! I know they are there.


There is just so much to say about my new life now since coming back, I would take day's writing it all! Suffice it to say there is a heaven. This is a place of learning for where we are to spend eternity, we are to bring as many people back as possible and the kindness or evil we do to each other causes people's lives to be forever changed. We affect possible generations to come. Even a harsh word could cause a person on the edge to turn away from God, so live it right folks and just give love and understanding if you can't do any thing else! I'm no god or angel - just someone who knows for a fact there is another place and what you do here you take with you, good and bad. It's all about who you helped get through, over, around and eventually back home. I do also have one what I call weird thing, I sometimes know what's going to happen, like a psychic, but I just feel things before they happen.


Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 11/27/1989

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness Clinical death I had an asthma attack and my left lung collapsed before getting to the hospital. When I got there the nurse said, after I told her I couldn't breathe, you look like your breathing to me!

How do you consider the content of your experience? Positive

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I was not in this body any more. I was not sick anymore and somehow light and cleaner for lack of words!

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I was totally conscious up there but my body was dead so I don't know how to answer that!

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning It seemed like I was gone for a week! However, they said only a few minutes and long enough to have possible brain damage but, as it turned out, I didn't have brain damage from lack of oxygen.

Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? I heard a buzzing loudly and I think light music to follow.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain Not the tunnel thing but a beautiful meadow of sorts.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes People I knew. Jesus' hands.

The experience included: Light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was the most beautiful of white silver lighted area and it should have hurt my eyes but didn't.

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm A meadow as I call it and to the gates as I call it!

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe What we are here, and how to get back home and to bring as many back with me as possible - which is why were talking today!

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I learned patience and just to ask for patience with troubles. I learned why we're here. I learned what to do here and I know what real love is, not just what people on earth think it is. In all this is millions of things to add!

The experience included: Vision of the future

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future With my own and my daughters etc. I am completely right on, but this isn't the point. If it helps people to see I'm usually right about things than so be it. Whatever lets them see there's more out there is fine with me!

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I reached the gates as I call it. No, I didn't cross if I had I knew, and was told, I wouldn't be able to be back on earth.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I knew there would be difficult times and painful ones but I'd have (help) to get through.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Conservative/fundamentalist

What is your religion now? Liberal

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I don't work too hard now. It's all about the love we get and give and I don't practice only Catholic religion any more. It's not about a set bunch of rules.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Oh God yes!!! I feel people rather than just getting to know them. I'm aware of angels and helpers and know things before they happen, mostly bad or harmful things to others and me. I can't take medicine and if I do I can only take a small amount it effects me like crazy! I'm super sensitive around power and lightening. I seem to feel power! I'm super sensitive to emotions of people, incredibly so - especially bad people for lack of a better word because there are no bad people just ones who don't know what's coming. Little children are drawn to me and animals follow me everywhere! I really find it hard to even go to the zoo!

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The best was I know I'm going to go home one day. The worst is I don't fit in here; I'm always going to be different. It gets lonely.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Anyone who'd stand still long enough! I since realized how to talk about it all without scaring people off but sometimes I still do. So many were and are influenced. Most I can only hope they use where I've been to help themselves.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I'm finding ways to live here on Earth but sometimes, it's lonely and I thank God for you all and being able to discuss all this. I'm also grateful he finally sent the one!

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Maybe all the strange things that happen to a person like clocks and power and being so supersensitive to so much you could find out what and then ask if we have these experiences.