After experiencing a 'non-survivable' heart attack, I passed out while being loaded into a helicopter for transport to a hospital. While not conscious, I remember lying in a hospital bed that seemed to be sitting at the beginning of chrome rails starting at the foot of my bed extending into infinity. The ceiling was navy blue with multiple white crosses. I was lying in bed at approximately a forty-five degree angle. Once, I looked up at the ceiling and the crosses were twisting. I felt I needed to make my bed move down the chrome rails. I was very happy. I felt completely like the only thing that mattered was myself. I felt completely absorbed within myself and absolutely nothing was important at all - not money, not sports cars, not even my mother whom I had always cherished my entire life. I felt it was ultimately ridiculous to think anything on Earth or anything that was material was in any way important at all. It is not.Next, I saw that I was standing beside my bed and looking at myself lying there. I was several feet away. Then, I heard a nurse screaming repeatedly, 'Hey! I'm not getting a breath here!' She keep yelling loudly and repeating the statement. Even though I seemed to know it was going to hurt, I decided just to take one breath just to get her to be quiet. When I did, I immediately returned to life experiencing a lot of pain and being angry with the nurse for making me come back to pain and earthly problems and experiences. There should be absolutely no fear of death. I was feeling wonderful and very resentful that I had to wake up.
Date NDE Occurred: September 1998
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Heart attack Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness As above.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? It seemed I was fully conscious at all times. I don't understand how I could see myself in the bed sitting up and conscious also. There seemed to be two of me.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes Chrome rails started at the foot of my hospital bed and extended into infinity.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I was very happy and confident, curious, observant.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control Nothing material or anything on Earth matters at all. Not at all. I felt this way for a long time. I felt we were all silly for even thinking so.
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What is your religion now? Moderate
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain Not sure how they would change. One quickly falls back in to normal everyday living.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I was absolutely happy, completely absorbed within myself, and resented return very much.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Several months. Their reaction was belief and interest, and asked more details. I told them death was not to be feared at all. They seemed to believe me and agreed.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I had heard of people going through tunnels and seeing a loving light at the end of it. I didn't see any tunnel nor light.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I will never forget how surprised I was that nothing was important at all - except oneself. One definitely dies alone, but that seems the way it is supposed to be. Death is welcome and not unpleasant. Not to be feared. I think our normal fear of death is a disservice to ourselves. But, of course, it has to be that way.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I know it was real. I didn't want to come back.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It was surprising to me to be so resentful about returning to life. I've always had a good time.
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