Experience Description

I lay down in my bed, I was very sad, I ate little and slept little. Several months earlier, my husband had left the house and I thought that I didn't have anything to live for on Earth. My children could live with their father and his new spouse. There was nothing to keep me here. I had decided to leave this life without remorse, without looking back. I didn't ingest, drink, or take any medicine. Only the will to leave guided me.

I closed my eyes, I was in the blackness as in a train, then suddenly as if the train had gotten in movement, I crossed rays of light, more and more accelerated. Then I am myself. I tried to raise my small finger, nothing happened. It was a stage of consciousness. I chose to continue. The train vanished. In the decor, there was soft light. I floated, like an immense sea; I felt water, the sand, the sun, as if I was on the side of a beach. Just the sensations, heat, humidity, light, very pleasant.

There was my cousin, my relatives and full of other deceased people. They told me, you are where you wished, we waited for you. It was gorgeously good. Then far away, I heard a voice very far away. I didn't want to hear it, I wanted to ignore it, but it persisted. I recognized my son's voice, first like a buzz then it got clearer, and then finally he repeated. 'Mom don’t die, you know you want to live, you know you like life,' he said repeatedly to me.

I thought 'no' in my head; let me be where I am. Then as if I had not accomplished everything before leaving, as if I had forgotten a precious baggage before taking the plane, I made the decision to come back.

My son had wakened up in middle of the night, he entered into my room, he thought that I slept and he told me these words.

After being back in my body, I heard what people thought and I felt their suffering that hurt me everywhere. I was not afraid of anything, nor of anyone. There was not any more limit to anything, to what I could accomplish; my son began to drag me, to come back in my body little by little.

I worked out of the home and my son watched over me; he had saved my life. Then a friend entered in my life that gave me back my taste for life, a soul sister. Since then, I have developed quite a lot of intuition, I live life and I pay attention to my body as if I was going to live to be very old. Several people told to me that I changed a lot for better. That is my history.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: December 2000

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No Je me suis couchée dans mon lit, j'étais très faible et très triste, je ne voulais plus vivre. J'ai décidé de mourir. Je voulais mourrir, ce n'est pas un suicide, je voulais partir ailleurs parce que je n'avais plus rien à faire sur terre, je vivais une séparation et j'étais très triste

How do you consider the content of your experience? Positive

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I was energy and light.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Very conscious.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning See above

Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? The sounds of my son's voice.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes A train on an iron-shod voice that crosses rays of light, more and more quickly and the baffles of the train disappear little by little, I am in infinity, and there is not any more horizon.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My cousin, my grandparents and others, 'you have a choice to come or go as you wish because your son is waiting for you.'

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Soft.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm See above

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I was very happy, a big well-being, no fear.

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I know that I came back for my children.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future In everyday life, I often know of things that go on and that happens.

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I arrived at a place where it was everywhere infinity.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I knew that it would be hard to come back and I had very badly.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal

What is your religion now? Liberal

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I like life, I live from day to day, and I don't especially have a fear of dying.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes To speak with another person who has not lived it.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes More intuition and with certain people one speaks itself in thought.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? What I saw and felt gives me confidence in life after the death. I find that there is a lot of suffering when one lives on Earth. When I came back in my body that made badly.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes They found it beautiful.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Sometimes when I am with special people who are full of energy for example, my soul-sister, I feel a sensation that resembles a little what I felt in my experience.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? It is complete enough.