I am looking at myself lying in a hospital bed. I am feeling strange, almost dreamlike, but in awe of seeing myself. Something takes hold of my left hand and I turn around, to my right. I am looking at this Being of Light and feel calm and at peace. The Being of Light takes hold of my right hand and releases my left while communicating with me that everything will be all right. The communication is not with spoken words but I just know this. I see a small light, which seems so far away.
During this time, I am feeling that this Being of Light is both male and female. I describe it as being calming and protective like a woman yet strong like a male. The Being of Light has no facial features and the light it emits is very soothing. In a blink of an eye, I am standing in a non-defined area with my Being of Light standing behind me and to my left with four other Beings of Light scattered to my right.
I am looking at a book, a HUGE book, on an equally large table. A man appears, I know this because of his long brown hair and beard. He is wearing a white glowing robe. He flips through the book, looks at me and asks me with spoken words if I want to stay or go back. I am seeing my mother and infant sister, not in pictures but in my mind and then I wake. The first thing I see is the green tile wall in my hospital room and I start screaming. I remember people rushing in around me and that was that.
I also must add that I had been in a coma for one week and my memory from the age of eight and earlier had been erased.
Date NDE Occurred: 'December, 1980'
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No Direct head injury Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness The entire experience.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? The entire experience.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Time seemed to go fast but being so young I am not sure if that was the case.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Because of the closed head injury I suffered amnesia and am not able to recall anything before the accident.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I saw a small beam of light and then was standing in a room with the same light field, presumably having gone through some sort of tunnel.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes One accompanied me on my journey. There were four other Beings of Light in the room and then a man was also present. He is the one who had flipped through the large book and asked me if I wanted to stay or go back.
The experience included: Darkness
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes A small beam of light. Also a Being of Light that accompanied me during my journey.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm The room filled with light was very beautiful.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I feel calmness, Wonder, and Awe.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
The experience included: Life review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate None
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Uncertain I did not grow in a religious family. Organized religion actually scares the hell out of me and I stay as far away from it as possible. I do feel very spiritual and have a strong understanding of people and their emotions.
What is your religion now? Moderate None
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Uncertain I did not grow in a religious family. Organized religion actually scares the hell out of me and I stay as far away from it as possible. I do feel very spiritual and have a strong understanding of people and their emotions.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes At the time, no. It was only later in life, around age eleven that I experienced and remembered my first 'special knowledge'. I was walking through the halls of my junior high school and I KNEW that I would not get pregnant until I was married and lived in my own house. A very strange thing for an eleven year old to experience, I must say. And a very true thing as well. This has been happening to me since my journey.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes At the time, being so young, I did not know what it was that had happened. It was only years later, at the age of fourteen did I first tell someone.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Many of the questions above did not apply to me at the time but do apply now. ESP, psychic knowledge and self-actualization have been part of my life since my teen years. I have not had any 'visions' of the future but have said many things that have come true. Some took many years, some just seconds.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I always believed that the flash of a baby was my infant sister but I now feel that is may have been my son.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Six years lapsed between the experience and sharing it. My mother cried and begged me to tell her over and over. I did go to church once with a friend in high school and told the pastor. He got very angry and told me that my experience did not mean I was saved. I have not been in a church since. My first boyfriend's mother did tell me that the book I saw was/is 'The Book of Life'. I did not know what that was until the age of seventeen.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain I have no memory of my life before my NDE.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real I didn't view it at all. It wasn't until a later age did I discuss and really feel it. Even now, when I share my feelings, it feels like it's still happening. Everything I experienced was so profound that I can feel the Being of Light holding my hand even now.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was probably real
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No