Experience Description

I was on my bicycle and the brakes failed just as I was riding into heavy traffic. I was not wearing a helmet. There was a large vehicle headed towards me and I realized there was not enough time for me to get out of the way. I saw how shocked the driver and passenger looked. I thought ‘well, that is it for me’.

My unconscious body lay in the middle of the main street. The vehicle that had hit me sped off and no one had called an ambulance. It seemed that nobody had seen the accident. I went to the light and it felt good. I could not go all the way because of my seven children, the youngest of whom was seven. I had to fight it. I would not be afraid of passing through it again now though because I know things will be fine.

As I was returning, I saw from above that there was a lumberjack, or at least a man who looked like one, standing near my body (a handsome blond man with long hair who was wearing plaid shirt, jeans and a smile). He was talking to me and his words sounded beautiful but I could not understand him. I now realize he wasn't ‘real’ because I could see him from above. He had parked a light blue Econoline van across the street sideways so no cars could run over me, not in reality, but clearly in my mind. His head got bigger as he looked at me, smiling and he said ‘she’ll be okay’. Then I fell asleep. I awoke later to find my condition was far from okay but I decided to carry on and over time, I have become used to it.

When I awoke in the hospital after the near death experience, my first thought was ‘I cannot live like this’, I was in such chronic pain. It felt as if the top and one backside of my head had been severely damaged. I think I had been hit by the vehicle and was flung over the handlebars. I then hit the top of my head on the hard street surface. I think the impact ‘smashed’ the top of my head and left the nerves broken leaving me in excruciating pain. My brain was bruised to the back left of my head and I lost all hearing in my left ear. I have a very loud, awful screaming sound in that ear now, which drowns out all other sounds. I am in constant pain and left with uncontrollable jerky movements.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 09-30-94

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident. Direct head injury Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Bike accident with severe head injury.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Going into the light.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Everything stopped.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I could see from all angles.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My physical hearing is affected to this day with a thunder like sound, a throbbing head and the same pain I had after the accident.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I went through a tunnel to the light.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes The lumberjack.

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes A beautiful light and I am no longer afraid of death. I had to fight it to stay here.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I was on many levels at the same time.

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? My emotions were acute and aware.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I was aware of all of my life experiences.

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future It is all good.

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I did not go further because my children needed me here.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I love all religions (not so keen on Liberal Protestants who hate Evangelicals!).

What is your religion now? Moderate All beliefs

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I love all religions (not so keen on Liberal Protestants who hate Evangelicals!).

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I could sense and feel everything.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I think I am ‘dipsy’ but I was already an artist so people just accepted me the way I am. I try to make the uncontrollable jerks, which have lessened over the years, seem like hiccups when I hold my grandchildren.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes For years I thought some of the things I experienced were this ordinary everyday reality. For example, I wanted to find the wonderful man who saved me by saying ‘she'll be OK’ but finally I realized that he was part of my experience.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I see very well how things are connected.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The vision of everything, which I paint pictures of now.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes My husband understands because he is an earthy artist.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I thought the lumberjack and Econoline were ‘real’. I wanted to put an ad in the paper to find that person and thank him for keeping the cars from running over me when I was unconscious in the middle of the street

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I loved it and want to capture it in paintings.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes I saw a vision the other night and want to paint a picture of it.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It was hard to come back and I thought of life as God (good) and death as the Devil (evil) and that helped me fight death for life.