Before I had the experience, I broke down at my desk and I remember the arrival of the emergency physician and the ambulance. Then I remember a black tube, which turned into a brick tunnel, and on the walls of the tunnel, there were old oil paintings, which depicted scenes of my life. While I was crawling through the tunnel 'on all fours', I felt like I was being crushed by an unbearable burden. I could see a faint, but very bright light at the end of the tunnel. I was pushed forwards by the thought that that was exactly where I had to be. The nearer I came to this light, the lighter the burden that was on me seemed to become. When I got to the light I reached into it with my right hand first, and it was pleasantly warm - in contrast to the tunnel which was cold as ice (I was sweating anyway).
As I stepped through the light everything became very bright, airy and wonderfully beautiful around me, and I lost the burden that was previously threatening to crush me.
I felt happy and free, as if I was lying in a fragrant meadow with a slight breeze on a warm summer's day. In the next moment I was lying in my grave, I could clearly see the walls next to me. My husband and my daughter were standing above the grave and were completely devastated. I called to them that they shouldn't worry, I was fine and I would wait for them. After that my husband tossed in the rose he held in his hands, but my (at the time) thirteen year old daughter refused to cast hers in, even though I repeatedly asked her to. Suddenly I was back in the tunnel and another black tunnel appeared to my right. My consciousness slowly returned, and I could hear the doctor and the nurse saying excitedly, she's coming around again. Later they explained to me where I was and what had happened and that I should write down my experiences.
Date NDE Occurred: 09/25/2003
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Bin auf Arbeit zusammengebrochen und am nächsten Tag auf
der Intensivstation wachgeworden
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I can't, I have had a similar level of consciousness before in my dreams
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? As I stepped into the light and as I lay in the grave.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Can't say.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did your vision differ in any way from normal? In the light everything was much clearer and brighter, in the tunnel normal outlines and colors.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes A brick tunnel, never seen this before or after - the stones were brownish, and there were pictures in gold frames on the walls depicting people and circumstances of my preceding life. I didn't have time though to really look at the pictures.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My husband and my daughter.
The experience included: Darkness
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Brighter than anything I've ever seen before, but it wasn't blinding. It was pleasant and sort of white, and it exuded peace and warmth.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm Als ich ins Licht trat, man kann es nicht beschreiben so schön war es, muß eine andere Dimension gewesen sein
What emotions did you feel during the experience? In the tunnel - overwhelming, psychological dead-end. In the light - free and relaxed and filled with unbelievable peace and happiness.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
The experience included: Life review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control In pictures, circumstances of my life with other people, but I can't describe any details.
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes From the tunnel into the light, it was like a wall. I just knew it would be good for me if I stepped completely into the light.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal keins
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What is your religion now? Liberal keins
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Since I was five years old I have been having dreams that would come true again and again, concerning me and also others. I was a so-called sleepwalker. I was often afraid, because I had no influence on the course of events. Have also read cards on and off.
Almost a year after my NDE I read the cards again and found myself in a kind of trance, though I was fully conscious, and I read the cards so precisely and knowledgeably for the lady I was reading for, that I was shaken up and bewildered myself, and since then I haven't touched the cards or done anything similar. Since that time, I've also been pretty much left in peace by my 'dreams'. I have substantially contributed to this myself. I have withdrawn my own sleep. Only with a television or a radio turned on.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I am not afraid of my own death anymore because I have already lain in my own grave.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes About twelve hours. I talked to my doctor about it, and he suggested I write it down.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Only the usual 'talk' about the light, but no detailed information.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. I am certain that my experience was real, because of my previous dreams and 'visions' (positive and negative). I am also an atheist by the way, doesn't sound logical, but all I know is that there is more out there than our 'usual level of consciousness' will allow.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. See previous answer to same type of question.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No