Experience Description

I was freebasing cocaine and seized. I left my body and saw myself seizing including graphic physical unpleasant visualizations. I was tied up. I was told while I was unconscious to envision a rope and climb up it. I pictured myself at the bottom of a deep pit, or black tunnel with a light at the top. I pictured a rope and physically felt as if I was climbing up it toward the light (life.) I did also feel the general impression it was a choice to do so. When I reached the top, I regained consciousness.

But this was not one experience. It opened a door to many other experiences. I received messages from God and Buddha in a dream, many years later, right before miscarrying a child.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 1988

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Drug use....seizure. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Death.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness When I was out of my body.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was out of my body.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I have learned since, specifically told to me, that 'time is bendable'.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I was at the bottom of a 'hole' or 'tunnel' and a voice, which I assumed at the time was my boyfriend's, though I have never confirmed this, told me to envision a rope and climb up it toward the light. I did so, and it felt very real and physical. When I reached the top, I awakened from a seizure. I had a few before that, a couple afterward, and had a Grand Mal two years ago.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Wanting to live, survive.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

The experience included: Vision of the future

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future But only many years later. Still waiting to see.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Liberal 'Former Greek Orhtodox Catholic, now, if forced to choose, Buddhist.'

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Well, my NDE did not give this to me, but I had an experience around the age of four or five where I was spinning in circles on a beach and all became clear to me about the universe, I had an existential experience where I questioned who I was and where I was and why, but I was too young to understand the answers.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Many people think I am a little crazy or eccentric.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Well, I feel I always had some kind of paranormal experiences throughout my life, however insignificant, but I have experienced 'spirits' throughout the years and also clairvoyant experiences, and tons of synchronicity.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I did view myself out of my body.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Most people do not take me seriously.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It has been twenty-one years and I remember the experience in its entirety, and I actually have a poor memory at times.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes I had contact with my deceased grandmother, first through a dream, which consisted of three parts in which the 'secrets' of existence were revealed to me, and then the next morning she conversed with me through stream of consciousness writing.