I was having hallucinations by the time my husband arrived home. He had been on his way to a settlement in South Africa, when a voice told him to turn around and get home. Why he did, we do not know. I had asked a nurse, who lived near us, to take care of my child. She made me tell her I had overdosed and she had gotten me to vomit. She could not keep me awake. My husband kept hitting me, when he got home, to wake me up and I can remember scratching the back of his van searching for shoes, I was sure I had lost. I then bit the nurses who tried to get the stomach pump into me. They removed my false teeth to stop me biting and then I was out of my body. I watched the doctor say ‘we are losing her, we are losing her.’ Then, I was in a tunnel and travelling to a light with a wonderful feeling of love and protection. A voice said ‘why have you stopped fighting? Don't you know I am still with you?’ I was then told that I had to go back. I did not want to, but I woke up in a body that had voided and was really manly. The doctor was almost in tears and said ‘we nearly lost you’. I tried to comfort him and the nurse showed me where I had bitten her. I was completely lucid and felt really bad and at the same time elated, but bodily tired too.
Date NDE Occurred: August 1980
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Drug or medication overdose. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
I took four to seven medications for bi-polar treatment taking two weeks in one sitting.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly saw my body and the doctor and nurse working on me, but I could not see what they were doing, as I was above and to the side, then I was not aware of them.
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I barely can remember what I have for breakfast, and have a lot of practice forgetting things, this experience has never faded.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Out of my body
Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
I felt I was moving fast.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I was in a bad nightmare before, and then it was love and more real than love in the physical plane.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I am not sure I was using normal senses. I just knew. I could hear the doctor, but not the nurse’s response.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
The experience included: Tunnel
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes It was a light then dark, and disappeared as it approached.
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes A warm bright light.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Total love
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will It said ‘you have to go back’.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant Hated God
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I am no longer Christian or in an organized religion.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other or several faiths I am now a spiritualist
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I believed in a God that was vengeful as a father figure. I became confused after as I tried to find the being who loved me, but the churches had another interpretation.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Today I am vegetarian as I feel it is wrong to take life. This is in spite of the fact I love the taste and smell of meat. I am studying to become a medium. I have educated myself to a professional level and ensured my daughters are educated, despite my family beliefs. I have studied past- life regression, to try to understand why children and other souls must suffer. I constantly question everything and despair of organized religion in all forms believing it to be bad for humans. I am so unlike what I was, before the experience.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Subsequent to this I started to study past life regression therapy. I actually became scared to die after I returned to life, but it was told I would not live long with my health problems, so I guess that feeling made me fight to live, which the being wan
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes There was a prescience of total love
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I knew I would survive and I knew I could change not only me but the world.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? Unknown
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists No
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I did not fear death
Do you fear death after your experience? I slightly fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes The knowledge that we are important and matter, we are meaningful.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I had not experienced much kindness in life. My step father had put forks in my eyes. I had been taken from my extended family. I was beaten in one case so severely that I was given two hours to live. My Father once he got me back, did not want the proble
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life Large changes in my life. I searched religions, after this, for a meaning, an explanation that I could understand. I became a rebel to society in many ways, forcing change, because I do not want or need society’s acceptance at the cost of my soul.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I refused to allow my husband to abuse me. We have now been married for 36 years. I removed negative people from my environment, although it took time with my parents to take that step. I was able to forgive and understand, that did not mean forgetting, but changing the situation to ensure those that could not change, had to be released.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes There was a psychological shift. I was loved and this had not been something to which I was familiar.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience It defined me.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain I can see auras, but not in color. My mother said I was deadly ill at 6 months, and I think I may have had a NDE then, as certain things like being aware of other beings, déjà vu, foreseeing certain events before they happen and vivid dreams have always been part of me. Now I am developing them, I am frustrated by blocks that I seem to have, which I am sure were put there as a child as a product of a vivid imagination, for which I was always being punished.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The experience defined me.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes There was no understanding. Hostility, a sense I was weird.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain I think I died at 6 months and was brought back. I had an intersection of the bowel and appendicitis. From the scarring, you can see I had peritonitis. The surgeon who worked on me in 1960, also worked on my elder brother who had died, so I think the doctor went above and beyond to save me, from what I was told.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It was a shift in reality, which I would not have made. I was nearly blind, slightly deaf and very scared of everything before. I was so tired of fighting in my life. Afterwards, I coped with more bad things and survived and overcame.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It still defines my search for meaning. I have the education to understand the mind, the brain and nothing can explain why I had an experience that mirrors so many others in so many ways. Collective unconscious does not explain the clarity nor does electrical discharge of neurons, or electrical activity of the brain. Hallucinations are different from this.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Hypnotherapy, but not to the same intensity
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It was positive.
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