I was on medical leave from work and just had my third knee surgery because of an infection. As I was out of work for a long period of time, I was on medication for depression that I stopped taking because I ran out. Fourteen days later, I decided that life was not worth living and decided to swallow pills. I ended up in the emergency room. They started an IV, called poison control, and they were told to give me an antidote and monitor me. I don't remember anything that evening. I then was taken to the critical care unit where I was in kidney and liver failure and they told my love ones that I might not make it through the night. I stopped breathing and coded. They were trying to tube me, I aspirated and now had fluid in my lungs, and as time went on, I had a fever of 104.
I don't remember anything except a man standing next to my bed leaning against the wall with his arms folded and he showed no emotion just stared at me. I now know he was sent to watch over me.
Then the next thing I know was I was standing by a gate with other spirits and looking at my hands and arms realizing I too was in spirit form. We did not speak to one another we just waited and it was so bright and blinding but it did not hurt my eyes. I knew if I went through the gate, everything would be final and there would be no turning back. I then heard a voice of a female in my head telling me I must return that it was not my time. I then woke up on life support and the doctors telling me to take a deep breath so they could remove the tube. I couldn't take a deep enough breath and they were struggling to pull the tube out, so they placed me in a drug induced coma and restrained my arms. I was like that for two days.
I then was taken out of the coma and they were able to remove the breathing tube. There was a male nurse sitting next to me and he asked me if I could speak. I whispered yes and he then asked me what I remembered. I told him I was aware that I was dead and told him everything that had happened. He told me I was dead and they couldn't get the tube down my airway, I suffer from sleep apnea so it was a struggle and then I coded. Every doctor that came in and saw me in intensive care said I should have died and they didn't understand how I made it. After fourteen days of intensive care, I was able to go home.
I can only say when I was dead the feeling was wonderful, unexplainable, and the love I felt was unconditional. I walked away without any brain damage or any ill effects. As strange as this may sound it was the best thing that could of happen to me.
Date NDE Occurred: 06/10/07
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Suicide attempt Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) . Overdose.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal When I was dead.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was dead.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I was standing and waiting for a long period of time.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did your vision differ in any way from normal? Everything had so much more clarity.
Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? Communication was done with the mind.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes There were other spirits all around me.
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes All of my surroundings were very blinding but did not hurt my eyes and there was a mist all around me.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm dimension I know I was not in our place called earth
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Overwhelming peace and love.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I knew it would be final if I crossed through the gate.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I have become very spiritual and know there is a higher power.
What is your religion now? Moderate
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I have become very spiritual and know there is a higher power.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes That there is no hell that hell is within us as we create it, that we are all here to love everyone unconditionally and not to judge anyone for mistakes they have made. As humans we are here to live life to the fullest and live in harmony.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes My husband keeps telling me that I can read his mind. I sometime sense what others are thinking I sometimes know who's calling me before I look at my caller ID and I have become very intuitive.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The feeling.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Much more intuitive and more connected to others.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? All of it. I now do not fear death and I feel I was given a second chance for a reason. I feel I am on some kind of a mission that I must fulfill.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I told everyone as soon as I was able to speak, most embrace it some don't know what to think.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Heard about it, I did work in nursing in long-term care and have helped others experience death and knew there was more to it.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. I just know it was not a dream because of the feeling I felt.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I am now very sensitive to medications and skin change.