I was 11 weeks pregnant and started feeling bad the previous day. I thought I had a cold, but during the night, I started wheezing. I was not taking care of my asthma condition properly; I had no health insurance and was not on the proper medication.
By the morning, I was in respiratory distress. Although I was so sick that I didn't realize how critical my situation really was. I was having a full-blown asthma attack, and I had my stepson call 911. The emergency medical technicians arrived and had me walk to the ambulance. On the way to the hospital, Paramedics also joined the emergency medical technicians. That's the last thing I remember before I lost consciousness.
Then I was moving through this purple light. Although it was dark, I wasn't afraid. I then entered pure white light. I have a hard time explaining how and what I felt; because there are no words to describe how beautiful, loving and peaceful it was. It was like I was surrounded in warm, loving wings of light. I have never felt anything close to this, before or after, this experience. I heard a little boy's voice say, ‘Mommy, don't leave me.’ I thought it was my 7-year-old son, who asked me if I was going to die as I was leaving my house with the emergency medical technicians. I did not want to leave where I was; I have never felt so good.
Then I saw my Mother-in-law, who died four months before. She told me that I didn't belong there, that I had to go back. Next thing I remember I am looking down at the emergency medical technicians and Paramedics as they're wheeling my body from the ambulance into the hospital. Then I am behind my Mother who is talking to doctors in the emergency room about what was happening with me. I regained consciousness off and on for a few hours until I was put into a medically induced coma. I woke up sometime on Monday, connected to a ventilator and many other devices that were keeping me alive, including an insulin pump.
Date NDE Occurred: 'Saturday, October 29, 2005'
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness. CPR given Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
I was having an asthma attack brought on by a virus. I stopped breathing.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I saw my body on a gurney being transported from the ambulance into the hospital. I saw my Mother talking to doctors, (in another area of the emergency room), about what had happened and about my care.
I have verified with my mother that while she was speaking with the doctors when she got to the hospital: I was definitely unconscious.
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal My senses were more sensitive. I felt everything: the light, my deceased Mother-in-law, the words I heard. I was more connected.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was in the light, talking to my Mother-in-law, and my unborn child, it turns out.
Were your thoughts speeded up? No
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My vision was more than just vision. What I saw I also felt in the core of my being.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. When I heard my son and Mother-in-law speaks to me, it was like I was hearing it in my head, like telepathy.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain I remember the darker purple light before I saw the white light, so I am uncertain.
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes The little boy I heard was my son, whom I was pregnant with at the time. About a year ago, we were in his bedroom, and I left to do something in another part of the house. He chased after me saying, ‘Mommy, don't leave me!’ There was NO doubt anymore that I heard him during my experience.
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I have never seen any light like it on earth. It permeated everything. I felt it.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt love, peace, comfort, contentment, happiness. All these emotions were magnified.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Other faiths- New age I was raised Roman Catholic.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I am way more spiritual. I openly practice witchcraft. I study and read anything about the paranormal and spirituality. I want to make myself as good as a person as I can and make a positive impact while I'm here.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other faiths- New age
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I believed in reincarnation before this experience and the continuation of our spirits after we leave our bodies. This experience confirmed my already existing beliefs.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No I believed in reincarnation before this experience and the continuation of our spirits after we leave our bodies. This experience confirmed my already existing beliefs.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I was returning to raise my children.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes I knew that I was supposed to go back and raise my children.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists No
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? No
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life I take care of my health: I live for ME now. I practice preventative medicine. I had been ‘In the Broom Closet’ for many years: I am a practicing witch and hid it from my Roman Catholic family. I am now open with my family about my beliefs, and really don't care what other people think. I have become more spiritual, which certainly helped me with getting sober. Large changes in my life.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I know that we're all here to learn and we are all connected. I am more aware and present with all my interactions with people, with every life form now.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I have nothing to compare this experience with here. There was only positive feelings and beautiful light, that only scratches the surface of how wonderful it was or how I felt.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience I remember this experience the same as the day it happened. It is probably the strongest memory I have.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I have developed telepathy and empathy with animals, and sometimes plants. My remote viewing skills have gotten stronger. My empathy skills have increased dramatically. I ‘get information’ differently. I am now telepathic and get information visually.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I am happy that I got to see my Mother-in-law one more time. I also now know that at 11 weeks, my son's spirit was already with me and we have a special bond. What is waiting for us after we leave our body is so magnificent: Pure love. I am not afraid to die.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Two weeks later. When my Mom told me that I died in the ambulance, I shared my experience with her. I shared it with my fiancé, he was happy that I saw his mother.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I know that I’d heard about NDEs, but I don't remember where or from whom.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real This experience was REAL. It wasn't a dream, I felt different. It is one of the only memories I had from my hospital trip. Before I was sedated in the intensive care unit, I dreamed. I don't remember those dreams, but I can't forget my experience.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real After almost 7 years, the memory of it is the same. I can still feel how wonderful it was.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Although the circumstances that led me to have a NDE were horrible, and terrifying to everyone involved, I feel blessed to have had the experience. I am grateful that my son was unharmed. Whatever force that created us took care of me and my baby and we have the opportunity to share our lives together on earth. No one came to me and told me that I died. I knew something drastic happened when my father came to see me in the hospital, as soon as I was transferred out of intensive care unit. My father NEVER goes to the hospital. I had to ask questions. If I didn't ask how I got the bruises on my abdomen or make the comment, ‘I know I almost died’, no one would have told me. I remember this experience the same as the day it happened. It is probably the strongest memory I have.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Asking about the point when you knew you had a NDE.