I was on the operation table; the last event I have in my memory was when I received the anesthesia in my hand. I don't know how much time passed, but I was in a state of peace and I felt so loved unlike ever in my whole life, but not that I didn't experience love in my life, it was just something different that cannot be explained in words. But I was sent back exactly in the moment when I was feeling so happy, those voices which were not a human language (like Romanian, English or something like this) but a communication. I was pushed back gently and with the same love, while having flashes of my son, mother and father (who were still alive). I saw my husband in the corner of a room weeping as he was waiting for me and this was the first image I had when I opened my eyes after half an hour from the operation.
I needed many years until I felt comfortable to talk about this because I didn't want to be considered as a good candidate for a psychiatric hospital, but now I see that these topics are more common. I cannot describe very well but there was no tunnel of light. There was simply a warm light and a smell which since then I try to recall but cannot, nothing compares to that state of well-being. This is I believe what Jesus meant when saying 'Peace be with you.' I am not a fanatical religious person, but I feel a presence around me, which makes me feel protected, I am not a millionaire but I am always guided in positive ways even if sometimes I feel like giving up. I had and still have experiences, some of them with witnesses, which can attest to these experiences.
What made me decide to start talking about what was happening to me when my grandmother, God help her rest in peace, died. I live in USA, my grandmother died in Romania. That night I was with my son in the room with the TV, I was smoking (bad habit, but that's it), all day I was agitated, it was 11:30 pm, I could not sleep - the same thing with my son. At one moment a plate fell from the stack (it was there since 5:00 pm where there were three other plates) and I saw the clear image of my grandmother fallen near her bed, full of blood. I did not want to scare my son, but I told him 'the grandmother died'. Instantly I became calm, I shut off the TV and we went to bed. Next morning I went to work and I could not stop thinking about what happened the previous night. At 3:00 pm, I called home and I asked my mother about my grandmother after which my mother remained shocked. My mother did not want to tell me and just said to not worry because I loved her much and she loved me.
Only after about five years, I had the courage to ask my mother how the grandmother died, I was afraid not to know I guess and the answer from my aunt who found my grandmother was exactly what I knew, exactly around 6:30 am Romanian time, which is 11:30 pm Eastern standard Time in USA. She died of liver complications by throwing up, so there was a bath of blood near her, fallen to her knees near the bed. The same type of experiences I had with relatives from my husband's side, but I also have other types of visions, which I always thought as being coincidences, for example one morning I told my husband to drive carefully because he will be stopped by the police for speeding. After thirty minutes he was stopped. Another time I told my son to pay attention, he didn't want to listen to me, and he broke his leg. What I don't understand is why I cannot prevent what I know could happen. I had a nightmare two days before my father died and I told many about it and nobody listened to me; then he died - so I concluded that whatever I see will happen no matter what I choose. After the burial, I was with my sister and we could not sleep. I was extremely agitated and I was telling her I feel our father near me and my sister looked at me as if I was crazy and at one moment I felt a pinch on my neck and I jumped from the chair because of the pain and the chain around my neck opened by itself, it did not break, just opened.
Date NDE Occurred: iulie 1998 16
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related 'Illness, trauma or other condition not considered life threatening'
I was under anesthesia.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I woke up and I was very sad that I feel again the earthly hardships and I was feeling bad after the just recently experienced happiness, peace and love.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
There was nothing like we feel in our body; it was like a lift of burdens in a place where there are no limits.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I was hearing, but there were no sounds which I perceive in the day to day life, it is something extraordinary for which I cannot find something to compare it with.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes Not necessarily a tunnel or a light seen at the end of this tunnel, but more like a feeling, I cannot express in words - it's like a sensation of floating into something extraordinary.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes No beings as we know them or ghosts we see in movies. More like some spheres who were communicating with me.
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It is like a Light, but not like the light of a bulb or the light of the sun or something we are used to see. It is a mixed bluish yellowish grayish sparkling something - I cannot find words to describe it.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm LOCUL ACELA IN CARE MA AFLAM ERA CEVA MIRIFIC ,NU GRADINA CU VERDEATA SI POMI SI PASARI ,CI UN LOC CALD DAR NU LA PROPRIU CI LA FIGURAT ,UN LOC IN CARE SIMTI IUBIREA FIZIC TE ATINGE IUBIREA
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Silence, peace, love, an unreal smell, an unreal light, nothing like what we see with our eye in our life.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate Ortodox
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes Before all was a strict set of rules to follow. But later I discovered what it means to love from faith and not from fear that you will be punished if you don't do what you are told to. All you need is to share love and peace and then you see how all changes: to not hate because you block the possibility to feel love; to not steal because you block the means to have joy when you receive; to not kill because your spirit is then no longer free - but bound to the spirit you have killed. Here is the Biblical secret, which God and Jesus try to make us understand. The rituals of some cults or the rituals and rules of the church were created I believe just so we fear falling into a state where we forget true love and true goodness and all that is explained in the Bible. The best is to follow what is in your heart not because some clergy says it, because all clergy learned it from others. Best is to do as God guides you, open your heart and not be too strict and narrow minded, life on earth is just an illusion.
What is your religion now? Moderate
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Before all was a strict set of rules to follow. But later I discovered what it means to love from faith and not from fear that you will be punished if you don't do what you are told to. All you need is to share love and peace and then you see how all changes: to not hate because you block the possibility to feel love; to not steal because you block the means to have joy when you receive; to not kill because your spirit is then no longer free - but bound to the spirit you have killed. Here is the Biblical secret, which God and Jesus try to make us understand. The rituals of some cults or the rituals and rules of the church were created I believe just so we fear falling into a state where we forget true love and true goodness and all that is explained in the Bible. The best is to follow what is in your heart not because some clergy says it, because all clergy learned it from others. Best is to do as God guides you, open your heart and not be too strict and narrow minded, life on earth is just an illusion.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I learned to feel people, to know how to treat each person.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I am more receptive to the spiritual than to the material, I see the world with different eyes. If until then all seemed normal, now I see everywhere the miracle of life and creation. I have wonderful experiences with strangers who I get to know in different circumstances. They have great heart and spirit. I have a girlfriend who calls me each time I have a problem and asks me if I am sad without knowing anything and I call her when she is in trouble and without setting up a meeting we just run into each other unexpectedly.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The sensation of peace and the way in which I understood the message from those who were on the other side.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I see small balls of light now and then or I feel a sensation of discomfort when someone has evil thoughts. I can feel cold and at the same time my legs and hands are expanding (like when there is something bad going on with them), I have places in my house where I feel it is colder though it's in the same room, I wake up and talk to my mother and father and then I talk at the phone the same stuff and I know ahead of time all the answers and the entire conversation.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The feeling of peace and love that surrounded me.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes In a very limited circle I showed some photos I have and which I cannot explain, I think all I talked to believe me. I don't share with those I don't know or those whom I feel have nothing to do with love.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real If until then the idea that one day I will die frightened me, now I feel death is just a step towards another stage of existence.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I have more to share but I would like to know if these things can be explained scientifically or if they just happen? How could I develop the power of premonition or is it better to leave things as they are?