Experience Description

I'm in a very, very dark place (frighteningly dark), but I know to look for a light, and I find one off in the distance. The light becomes a tunnel head (opening); a force pulls me into the tunnel and pulls me very rapidly through a bluish-green tunnel. I'm thinking, 'Why am I back here. What have I done wrong?' I'm slammed up against the end of the tunnel, and cannot get a breath; simultaneously my life is flowing in front of my face, no matter how I turn to get away from it. Willing to shake hands with The Devil for a breath, I realize I'm going to have to do something about this life I'm confronting. My feeling is I'm being tortured because I can't breathe and I finally have a realization that I have to do something with this life. It dawns on me I will forgive myself for not doing it perfectly, and I say this aloud to myself. Upon saying this, the wall disappears and I'm in a warm beautiful 'really neat' place. The first thing I thought was, 'They lied to me; there's nothing to judge here with.' (Read that carefully.) The experience of being there was 'Like swimming naked at night in the Gulf of Mexico' totally supported, perfect environment. The next realization was that my body was not there, but I had a sense of where it should be. Next, I knew everything; I had all knowledge. There was also the realization that the past was around me, the future was around me but everything was Now. I was not the Now-ness, but I was a part of that Now-ness, and it could not be without me, and I could not be without it.

I began to be moved again and I wondered where I'm going, but I stop. I look around, and look below and see I'm over the University of Texas at Austin. While attending University of Texas I never bothered to find out what the quote carved into the administration building meant. Between classes you read, 'Ye shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free.' Every day I would read this and wonder what that meant, but I was into beer and football not truth. Voices speak; they are in my thoughts; they ask do you know what that means now? Before I could say no, bodies were stepping out of graves in the plaza in front of the administration building where I would pass to go to class. As I surmise I say 'Yes, it means you have to die to be born,' but I realize this will not affect me as I'm already dead. However, the voices say 'Now that you know, you have to go back.' I said (furiously) 'I want to talk to the Boss!

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 12/19/75

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Clinical death Complete loss of blood pressure.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Positive

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? ?????????????

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I entered The Oneness.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don't remember if there were any.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes See main narrative.

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes See main narrative.

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I became the light.

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm See main narrative.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Happy at being there, but angry at coming back.

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe The meaning of the word free is Love, there for Love is Truth.

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control See main narrative.

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will See main narrative.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I realized death was an adventure.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Merging with other peoples' thoughts.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Coming back was the worst part.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes See above.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? When I finally recollected that I had been in the tunnel before, I was able to identify three other NDEs and two when I was in the light which I had always called dreams.