I was asleep at my Grandmother's house. I was sleeping with her, in her bed. I suddenly awoke, struggling to breathe. I had asthma all of my life, so this was not particularly new or shocking to me, especially at my Grandmother's house. She had a cat and I often had asthma attacks when visiting her.
I tried to sit up and ask her to get my inhaler, but I couldn't. I realized that I was dying and there was nothing I could do about it. I was not frightened in any way, but had the brief thought that I didn't want my Grandmother to wake up and find me dead, in the bed with her. I knew that would be very traumatic for her. That was my last thought before my spirit left my body.
The next thing I saw was myself lying lifelessly next to my Grandmother in the bed. I could see the whole room and even remember seeing the clock. It was 4:37am. Then I began to ascend through the ceiling and to the outside. I could see the entire neighborhood by looking around. I could see what lights were on in the neighbors’ houses and the night sky above me. Then very quickly, I started moving toward the sky. It seemed the further I went, the faster I was traveling. The stars seemed to moving very quickly past me. And then I saw a bright light.
The light I saw was one that could never be described with words. It was not like any light I had ever seen here. If there were a light here as bright as the light I saw that night, it would surely be blinding. But instead, this was the brightest, softest, whitest, and peaceful light I have ever seen. I have not seen anything close since that experience. I quickly moved through this light and then I seemed to slow down and saw a presence in the light. I believe this to have been God. I remember thinking how awesome this was, and how peaceful and that I never wanted to leave this place. However, there was a conversation that ensued and though I don't remember to complete content of it, I do remember asking why I had to go back and why I could not stay. I knew I did not want to leave this place for any reason. I still to this day do not know what the answer was to my question. All I know is that I was told that I had to go back.
I then turned away and began my journey back. It was similar to what I had experienced when it all began. But it seemed to take even less time to return. I then re-entered my physical body, and sat up in the bed. I was very short of breath, and very aware at what had happened. But I didn't understand why I had come back from where I had been. I was amazed that this had happened to me and wondered why it had happened. I wanted to wake my Grandmother and tell her about it, but I figured she would think I was just dreaming. So I got up and found my inhaler. I used it and sat down to think about and try to remember the conversation that I had while there. But it never became clear and still hasn't.
I didn't tell anyone about this for years. And still, I have only told a few select people. Sometimes I think maybe I should tell everyone and then there are times I think everyone would think I am crazy. All I know for sure is that it was the most awesome thing that has ever happened to me and probably will remain to be so until my actual death. I am not afraid of death and I actually look forward to it. There is so much peace to look forward to.
Date NDE Occurred: 1991
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Asthma attack 'Not certain. I believe it would have been clinical death, but was not in a clinical environment to be sure.'I believe that I had an asthma attack that stopped my breathing. I was in bed at the time and was not in a clinical environment, so there is no clinical proof of this. But I knew that I was dying and there was nothing I could do about it.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I could see myself and everything around me. I was above my body and in no way connected to it any longer.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I was very alert, however physically I don't know if I was conscious the entire time.
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I traveled in such a manner that I know the time was altered. I saw the clock when I left my body, but I did not see it when I returned. It was 4:37 am when I left. And when I got up out of bed, it was about 5:00am. It was certainly an altered space and time, but I do not know how to describe that.
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I believe I was at the gates of Heaven, but did not actually see Heaven. I believe I was in the presence of God. And for whatever reason had to return to Earth.
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes There was only a presence of image in the light, or at the end of the light. Though I could not recognize it by sight, I was very comforted by being with it and I knew that we knew each other and I was safe and protected. The only communication I remember was that I had to return to Earth and I did not want to. I asked to stay and was told I could not. I do not remember any other conversation, and have always wondered why I had to come back.
The experience included: Light
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes The light is not easily described with words. As I stated before, it was the brightest, whitest light I have ever seen. I do not believe there is a way to describe it.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I could see, but other than that, I did not notice any other senses.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I was just overwhelmed with peace and joy, and in a way excitement. I couldn't believe it was happening to me.
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I knew that I was in the presence of God and felt this was the most powerful and most awesome of all beings. This was what the universe was about and nothing else mattered.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I was aware of it and knew I had to return to it. I knew that it was not my decision after asking to stay. If it had been my decision, I would not have returned.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Conservative/fundamentalist Baptist/Christian
What is your religion now? Conservative/fundamentalist Baptist/Christian
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I felt like I had a reason for being here but didn't know what it was. I knew that I would not be afraid to die when the time comes, but it did not change my beliefs.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes There are just no words that can explain the feelings or emotions, the brightness of light, the speed in which I traveled. It is just very difficult to describe in words many aspects of this event.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? There was nothing bad about it, other than knowing that I had to return and not knowing why it happened. Everything else about it was great. I think it is the most joyful, peaceful, awesome thing that has ever happened to me.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Though I have not shared this with very many, most of them thought it to be very interesting and thought that I should share it with more people. Most said they wish they could experience something similar and say that I am lucky that I did. What is interesting to me is that I have had several people ask me if I have had an experience like this, without knowing anything about me. And they told me they could tell that I was ‘one of those people’. One person who asked me this I did not even meet in person. He was a customer of mine on the phone at one of my jobs. A couple of them had had similar experiences and one had not.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? The only thing I can add is to tell everyone that there is no reason to fear death, if you know God. It is the most beautiful and greatest peace you will ever experience. There is life after death, and with the power of God, it can be your greatest reward.