I observed the body surrounded by a surgical team, then the hospital from above, then the hospital surrounded by wintering cornfields. I felt relief that the physical ordeal was over, colored with some minor apprehension about family.
I quickly lost all sight of my earthly environment. In space, it was not cold or particularly dark or foreign, but somehow familiar and vaguely pleasing. I came upon or was approached by familiar beings. They tried to talk with me, but I hesitated to connect with them. Instead, I was continuing to reflect on the life left behind. I was feeling anger and resentment about the medical malpractice leading to my ruined body. I heard assurances that I could return to a body that would be made serviceable. But I reacted negatively, because I didn't want to return to that situation. I was lovingly advised that this was my choice, which mollified me somewhat. I was then taken more deeply into light, thinking I was getting my wish and being taken home.
A life review of sorts followed, though the physical life just left made up only the smallest part of it. I seemed to be recalling (remembering) myself as a being prior to that physical incarnation, a being of the same character as those now with me. The recall was vivid. I had no doubt at the time of its accuracy. It was like rousing from a dream. The restored memory included awareness that the choice to return to physicality, though rightly mine, had been already made prior. I 'saw' that I had previously known of and been in agreement with the plan to exit the body as just occurred, for the purpose of rousing transcendent awareness that would gradually unfold upon return. I 'saw' that most of the current vision would fade upon return, but slowly return, in order that I could do what I had gone there to do.
This vision of things of itself seemed to draw me back toward Earth. Some part of me resisted, still wanting to stay, not wanting to return to the old situation with memory once again dimmed. It seemed such feeling had no effect on the transition, however. I was told not to fret, so to speak, that guidance would come to me in increasingly recognizable form, from that point on, and that I would at length become aware as I was then, even while 'in' the body. (It was actually clear then, as it is now, that we aren't really 'in' bodies - they are perhaps more like stiff mittens covering and restraining a tiny portion of ourselves).
Date NDE Occurred: 12-2-1972
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Other 'Military doctors not forthcoming. Malpractice cover-up involved. Gone from body 18 hours earth time. Clinical death possible, but not certain. Medical staff clearly surprised to see me rouse.'
Massive systemic infection associated with ruptured intestinal abscess.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal While in the light.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? While in the light.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
More like an absence, or 'simultaneity'.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. To a great extent, sensory input, though more vivid, seemed also merely reflective of a deeper awareness requiring no perception, per se. Processing this awareness initially included quite vivid perception, but attention soon went to the deeper place where processing and communication could happen more quickly and effectively.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. See above.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes It was a little like exiting a dark theater while the movie was playing into bright sunlight.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes Described above.
The experience included: Darkness
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Lights were all around in space, clustered so closely together toward an apparent center as to merge into a blinding apparent singularity.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm Perception seemed to become a basically reflective process. I felt increasingly joyful as my sense of awareness seemed to return, and this prompted some generation of perceivable beauty.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Described above.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
The experience included: Life review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control Included in event description above.
The experience included: Vision of the future
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I seemed aware of a field within which anything was possible, where each person's intentions were allowed to play out (largely unconsciously). My attention wasn't on any particular future outcome, as none seemed important.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal Raised by Episcopalian priest father and psychic mother. Both parents had interest in paranormal and contact with JB Rhine at Duke U.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Uncertain I was raised in religion, but never bought into it.
What is your religion now? Liberal Inclusive
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Uncertain I was raised in religion, but never bought into it.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Described above.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I generally have awareness of people as slumbering amnesiacs reflexively operating meat marionettes (including, at times, myself).
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No Principally, I think it has to do with the way language is structured to denote or operate within a 3D context. The challenge then seemed comparable to devising mathematical representations of complex 3D objects using plane geometry.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Such developments came over the next two or three years. At first, they were unwelcome, scary. Gradually, I realized I wasn't simply losing my marbles, and began studying other accounts of similar awakening (arousal), in efforts to integrate the apparently separate realities.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? As described above.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I began sharing what I could recall beginning about a year afterward. Reactions were for the most part negative. I was actually sharing more about the paranormal stuff happening than the NDE at first, as it was more clearly recalled.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Not exactly. I was theoretically aware of some form of afterlife, and of the apparent ability of some departed 'souls' to make themselves known to some embodied individuals. My parents were interested in this and had some personal experience with it, but I didn't, and was largely uninterested.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably not real I mostly couldn't recall it at first. What DID come to me seemed scary, and I put it out of mind as best I could.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Verification occurred as described above.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Many, somewhat described above. Some drugs prompted experiences, but nothing as deep. The deeper experiences came in lucid states, although sometimes I am (have been) roused from sleep to experience them by agencies of non-material origin - kind of like being inwardly shaken awake.