Experience Description

I was in bad pain, at ten on their scales. I asked God to take the pain away. Then I was suddenly above looking down on my monitor and IV pole and my body. I then saw a white being that floated up. I was asked if I was ready and I said yes. Then the being told me to follow. I followed and went to see my kids. I kept arguing that I could go and it would be okay for them. I went to the waiting room and saw my family. They were talking and I watched them. I saw my son on the playground at school. I then went to the light to see my mother who had passed. I could not go in. I would have to make a decision. I wanted to go, but the being showed me what would happen to my children if I did. It was bad.

So, basically I gave in and said okay. Then I went back to my body and watched myself go back in. Then the nurse grabbed my hand and said I was okay. There were things in between, but too painful to discuss at this time.

Weird part was that I watched this nurse take a coke break at the beginning of the experience and the nurse across the room chewed her out on her return because I had gone into respiratory arrest. The monitor flat-lined, but the hospital has little record of this, except that my records show that while the nurse was gone, my rates were exactly the same while she was gone. She made them up. Several nurses later verified this, against the hospital's wishes.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: November 1994

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Had cancer, hysterectomy, left a bleeder Hospital never admitted death. Records show otherwise, by nurse on duty.I was in pain, didn't know why. They kept giving me morphine to subside pain. Angel told me it was the ' bleeder' the doctor left in me. It would be healed.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes Really, more when I went back in. It was like the movie Ghost, where I watched my spirit hand go into my body hand.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Very alert, although I couldn't figure out at first why I was above the IV pole.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Just the flying to see the kids. It was very fast.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No I saw it, but could not pass, that was the decision making moment. I had a choice.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I saw people standing around the light, but not smiling, just standing. I had a feeling they knew me and loved me, but I did not recognize anyone.

The experience included: Light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I saw my child on his playground and verified this later with him playing football with a certain child and then I told the daycare worker what my daughter had for lunch. Spaghetti. It was true.

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I knew why I had died, and that God knew I had tried to commit suicide many years before.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control The only detail was that I had tried to commit suicide in high school. It was said to me, 'You tried to kill yourself once, now you are making your choice, don't threaten to do it again. You are choosing to live for your children. No more. You are to live.'

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I knew that my children would be in danger, although nothing had happened so far. I later found out, after I came back, that my daughter had been molested by her stepbrother. I had to fight for her. Then, my ex-husband entered a drug rehabilitation center, which would have left my children to I don't know what.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I decided to come back. I should never try to commit suicide again. That was my chance to go and I decided to stay.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate believed in miracles

What is your religion now? Moderate

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I now am not scared to die. It doesn't hurt.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I told my family I heard what they said in the waiting room - word for word.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No I already had them.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I didn't want to come back, just thought I needed to.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes They think I am nuts. Even after I quoted their conversations in the waiting room - now they sort of believe me.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I have nothing more to say and have told you more than I have told anyone. Do not contact me.