I was sixteen years old, history of emotional, psychical and sexual abuse, intoxicated, involved in a severe motor vehicle accident that threw me a hundred and thirty-eight feet, landing on the pavement face first. I do not remember the impact, transportation to the hospital or treatment up until the time of death. I remember the code team working on me, and then they slowly turned and walked away. The M.D. had said that it was over; he was ending the resuscitation attempt (calling the code).
I was floating in the air, up in the corner, above some equipment. I was looking down at everything. My vision was extremely clear and intense - as if being in a body was like being in a lens, and now it was clear. I felt wonderful - no body sensations, pain, or density. Everything was light and pure, beyond anything describable. I hung out in that space for a while, and then my parents arrived at the hospital (they had had to travel some distance to reach the hospital).
When they were allowed to enter the room to see me, my mother went into hysterics, and fell to the floor. She was in such extreme emotion, and I was in such a wonderful place, no suffering! I had been aware of the tunnel of light with me for a while, but did not seem compelled to approach it. I was allowed to make the decision whether or not to return.
As my mother was in extremis, I wanted her to know that it was all right, that I wasn't suffering - the next thing I know I'm holding out my hand to take hers. I've been back in this density, with pain and suffering, ever since (with brief excursions). Bummer.
Date NDE Occurred: 8/1967
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes AccidentDirect head injury Other pronounced dead
Saw the code team stop, and M.D. called the code. I was pronounced dead.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? While I was floating up in the corner of the room.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Clarity, colors, brightness, and depth perception.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don't remember hearing things exactly - more knowing on an emotional level.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I was aware of the tunnel and light, but didn't feel compelled to approach it.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm See above
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Comfort, light, weightless - without the burden on the body. As if this was what I was trying to get back to. No straining to get or do anything. No stress - no one could hurt me. Calm. Peace. Love.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control The experience taught me that there is a different level of existence (at least one) that transcends the lower level we appear to be existing in now.
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What is your religion now? Conservative/fundamentalist
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I'm here to accelerate the coming shift to this next dimension.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes More compassion, a deeper understanding of our struggles here on earth.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I'm afraid of sharing this information. But I will since I don't know you, and you don't know me. In the 1970's, we had 'encounter groups' and I participated.
During one exercise, I was placed at the head of the 'target' person, who was on a massage table, on his back, who was a priest. As I tried to put my hands on either side of his head, a blinding white light arced so strongly that it knocked him off the table, and I was left trying to understand and explain this the other ten or twelve people.
I also have numerous ESP experiences, some able to be duplicated, some not. Telekinesis of a pencil, and clairvoyance, etc. I have also, as a massage therapist, been present, with hands-on, as healings happened (many, many times). I also have the ability to tune-in to places and spaces, to read the history of events. Very disturbing, I've had to develop coping mechanisms, as these abilities are not necessarily controlled by me. I have seen angels during massage. I have also been aware of 'Grays' being present - I am also a UFO abductee, which also contributes to confusion of what comes from where.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I had been very religious as a small child. Visions of Jesus, angels, and etc. I even drew a picture when I was three of Jesus ascending with the Holy Spirit descending, which my aunt saved and returned to me when I was forty years old. A Catholic Bishop had told me that that level of experience was not to be had on this plane, and to stop talking about it. After this experience, I knew better.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I was probably two years before the incident with the priest. I had been having visions of the apartment I was living in. It was a scene that continues in a loop of time. I became so strong, and I did not understand what was happening, that one night I just packed my things and left. I moved back to the area two years later, and did some research. The apartment I had lived in had been used as a brothel in the 1840's. A man had killed his wife who was working there. There was also a man who loved the woman. He kept coming back to find her.
I have had many experiences of this sort. I also have precognitive dreams that when I share them, and they manifest, people (1) blame me for the occurrence, or, (2) tell me to never talk to them again.
There are times when psychic manifestations occur around me that I seem not to have control of, but manifest for the people around me to observe, and know that this density is not all that exists. When people observe 'supernatural' events, of course they back away. No one has ever asked questions, they just go away with mystified looks.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real One of my occupations has been working as a Respiratory Therapist and Cardio-Vascular Technologist specializing in Cardiac Arrest Teams, and working with heart transplant patients. This gave me great opportunity, over thirty-two years, to interview patients immediately after successful resuscitation attempts. Probably thirty percent of my patients remembered something immediately after, but it seemed to be lost to memory as time progresses (hours/days).
Also, both my parents were unfortunate (fortunate?) to have multiple NDEs.
My father had his first NDE when I was twenty-one (five years after mine). He told me he went to a 'gray place.' It was just gray, flat. He was a good Catholic - maybe he was sent to purgatory. My experience is people sometimes go where they expect to go. He had several more Codes, with the same experience. He finally got tired of going back and forth between realities because it was so difficult for him, and refused treatment, and died.
My mother's experience was different in that she had sixteen resuscitation attempts within four hours. She did go to the light down the tunnel with the associated bliss, joy, deliverance each time. Each time, they brought her back. When she finally could regain consciousness enough to talk, she told them adamantly not to resuscitate her again!
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Overdose of PCP - traveling around the house - tried to open the front door, but couldn't - light, no body sensations. My boyfriend had to come home and put me back in my body.
Just in the last months, I have attended a Pentecostal church, and had the experience of being 'slain in the spirit', which gave me the same joy, calm, peace, love, with a vision down the tunnel of light while in my body.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I'm sorry I had the decision to come back. I've spent so many years dragging this body around; I'm ready to trade-up now.