At one moment, when I had stopped eating and drinking, I went out of my body and saw an amazing light. But the most amazing experience is the FEELING. I had a huge feeling of love, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE. There are no human words to describe it. I had never before while in my body experienced what love is. I've been in love in my life, but it is so different and powerful to experience it while I was out of body. My Buddhist friends where talking about 'unconditional love' and I was always was trying to rationnally understand what it meant, or try to experience it. But at this moment, I WAS INTO IT. It is so amazing that there are no words to describe this feeling and way of being. I was in a bubble; I am LOVE, just LOVE. I remember it was even PAINFUL, as if my 'heart, body, and soul, was not big enough for this love. It was too much love for my soul/body. I was pure love.
Next, I had a life review. I saw every single second of my life that went in front of me; from my birth until the last second previous to the experience. Events were like photos that soembody would flip in front of me. Each time that I was not in a state of unconditional love, the photo stopped and a voice asked me, 'What could you do to behave differently? When I felt what I should have done, the pictures continued. Everything went very quickly. Or should I say that since there is no real time, it seemed to go very quickly. It was not a painful experience as nobody was judging me. They were just asking me.
I could also see the world through the lense of love. I could see people alive through this lense, why they were not 'perfect', why they were suffering, why one day they'd been so nasty with me, and what their path should be to become better. I was seeing people with different lights, some were higher than others, with different colors. It was like a spiraling map with colors. The people I knew were positioned around me. The higher, nicer, and closer they were to me these were the ones I loved the most. I never felt any judgment. I was looking at them with compassion and unconditional love.
Date NDE Occurred: 2009
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Severe all-of-a-sudden trauma. Illness, trauma or other condition not considered life threatening
After the trauma, I stopped drinking and eating. I went on a bed and stayed there for many days. I don't know exactly how many days because time stopped or flew by until the experience happened.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I could see people alive, and their 'alive souls'
It was really special to meet those people after the experience, as if I knew secrets about them and they did not know. I still felt compassion and unconditional love for them after the experience, so I had wonderful relations with everybody even with the nasty people or people that had hurt me. I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal Nothing compares. I didn't know what love is, unconditional love is, what compassion is, etc. I thought I knew, but here I WAS those feelings. I was nothing and everything at the same time.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? All the time.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. There was either no time or it seemed to go very fast. I don't know, but time was not an issue.
Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It can't be compared because my vision was everywhere. I could even see everywhere into a person's soul.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I had people asking me how I could be more in a state of unconditional love but not hearing a real voice. It was as if it were telepathy.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain I saw a huge light but don't recall a tunnel specifically
Did you see any beings in your experience? I sensed their presence
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes but not during the NDE, it was before this experience. My grandfather visited me several times after his death. I was young and I could not understand what was happening but he was THERE, close to my desk.
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an Unearthly light? Yes It was very bright.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I was just there and full of love
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? LOVE, LOVE, LOVE. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE and COMPASSION
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I WAS THE UNIVERSE!
The experience included: Life Review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control Every single minutes of my life was analyzed as to how I could be better.
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a Boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I could go on or come back
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life. I decided to come back because I was raising my child alone, with a dysfunctional father. I knew that my son could not have a good father and grow up safe and healthy. I saw my son, shouted his name, cried, and came back for him. I had the single and unique image to come back. I gave him birth and he was, to some extent, giving me a birth too.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Greatly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic I was a native catholic, close to highly involved catholic people. But personally, I was feeling more aligned with Buddhism. Nevertheless, I always had my virgin Mary medal around my neck and would never leave it. I was also very close to 'angels' when very young. My bedroom was full of angels - paintings, decorations of all types with angels on it, and etc. I could not sleep well if my things with angels were not around me. Today, I have an archangel Michael around my neck in addition of the virgin Mary.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes now, fully Buddhist even if I still have my catholic medals around my neck.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Buddhist Today, I'm closer to Buddhism than any other religion, and even more so since my NDE. The messages I received are really aligned with Buddhist philosophy.
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. Consistent but going further than my beliefs. For example, unconditional love was much more intense when I was able to be into this condition. I remember one inconsistent fact. I traveled through a huge tree, the grass, the soil and could 'feel' what they felt. But, I went into a stone and I remember my soul said, 'No, I can't believe a stone is alive.' It should be dead but it was not!
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Love, love, love. I still see everything around me through lenses of love, like during the experience but with less strength than the experience.Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin. Yes, but no words were spoken because the communication was with telepathy
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I sensed their presence
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes But not during this experience. I had this experience before when I was young and still do not fully understand what happened this day.
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes I was the universe. I was everywhere. I could even go into a tree, some herbs, and even stones.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain God is not a person, but A PLACE and an ATMOSPHERE.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Be love!
Did you believe that our earthly lives Are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes BE LOVE
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives Are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes To show me our path to love, for me but also for everybody around me and the challenges to overcome and to succeed through the power of love
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes If there is one single thing to remind it is the HUGE feeling of love, everything was around this.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life For the next 2 years after, I was still in a 'compassion, unconditional love bubble' that was protecting and guiding me. It brought me insights, information, and intuition almost every night. There was good and bad news. I could receive information for the future about friends lives, issues, and etc.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes more love and compassion. I appreciated my natural empathy, which blossomed even more after the experience.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes No human words can express what I felt. It is so strong that we have no comparison in human words. I wished I had a printer plugged to my head to be able to fully translate it.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. It is perfectly clear, as profoundly engraved into my soul the many details and I remember of everything.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Telepathy was huge. I had many intuitions before the experience. But at this time, it was concrete, and REAL. For example, I could see images of the Fukushima tsunami 3 days before it happened. But I did not know what place it was. I recognized it after the tragedy when I saw pictures on TV.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Love, unconditional love. I now know that we are on earth to experience love. That is the main objective of life.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes but not right afterwards. It was months and years, as if I could not really explain, dare sharing, or find the right words.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain No knowledge of NDE, but I did have knowledge of reincarnation. I already had some strange experiences of flashed images coming from past. Once I was visiting a castle. I could describe the furniture in the other room before entering, and I could recognize some paintings. I stayed totally silent for several hours after this experience. Years after, I read a book with described exactly what I had felt and then I studied reincarnation in great depth, like reading Ian Stevensson's books, watching all videos, hearing testimonials.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real don't understand the question.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes during a shamanism practice with Amazonian Indians in the middle of the jungle.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Yes. Afterwards, I forgot to mention that I had a strange relation with 'IT.' I could switch on my laptop being below my bed without touching it. During the few seconds, I had before deep sleep and waking me up I could switch on the laptop. I could hear the Hard Drive turning, and Windows ring. Then it was switching off by itself too. It was also during this short period that I received a lot of information about friends, world events, etc.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? How could we 'come back' to the post experience state of mind? After approximately 2 years most of the after NDE effects went off. It was very sad to lose this period of perfect grace on earth.
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