Remembering The Light Through Prosetry*: (*Integrating Prose And Poetry) Check it out at: Click Here
In the summer of 1955, a few days before my high school graduation, I experienced an unusual, frightening and incredible event. The memory of this event is not only crystal clear, but it remains intact, exactly as it happened. Every thought, word, image, action and feeling of this memory abides unchanged in my body and thoughts. I have spent years trying to forget it, but I always remember it, and I always remember it as if it happened today.
I was filled with joy and excitement. In a few days, I would finally graduate from high school and move forward with my life. Our class decided to have a picnic at a nearby lake as our final class outing before graduation, and I was excited about going.
I arrived at the lake and it was a great day for a picnic. The sun was shining; the sky was painted a beautiful shade of blue and dotted with perfect cotton ball clouds. A warm breeze blew the fresh smell of the trees, sand and lake everywhere.
I changed into my swimsuit and began the party with some beach games before lunch. After I ate, some of my friends swam out to a floating platform, about one hundred yards off shore. Once they got to the platform, they waved and yelled for me to join them. The water was much too cold for me to ease in slowly, so from 20 feet back, I took a running leap and hit the water with a gigantic belly flop. My body warmed up a bit as I got into my swimming rhythm. Then about half way to the floating platform, I felt the first cramping pains in my stomach and groin. ‘But the cramps aren’t that bad,’ I tell myself, ‘and besides, I’m almost half way there. I can make it.’
With every stroke, the cramps and pain increased, and my knees buckle into my stomach. I could no longer kick my legs or straighten my body. I was scared. My arms moved but I didn’t go anywhere but down. As I struggled beneath the surface of the water, I started gagging on the water. It was in my nose, down my windpipe and in my lungs. I was submerged, and then sank.
As I struggled, I finally got my head up out of the water. Frantically, I searched the water’s surface for the platform and my friends. No one recognized my dilemma. Down I went again, deeper than before. My arms felt frozen in place, and every muscle in my body screamed with pain. I never imagined that I could be in such unbearable pain. I sank deeper as the beautiful June sunlight faded to blackness. ‘Oh my God, it’s all black. I can’t see anything.’ A loud, painful, ringing sound was in my ears. It felt as if someone stuck an ice pick in my ears. I was convinced my brain would explode any second. I was falling endlessly down this freezing black hole. My body trembled uncontrollably in the freezing water.
I continued to sink into this ice-cold black hole; it seemed to last forever. Wait, I felt something. It was the slimy, cold weeds at the bottom of the lake. Struggling in this tangle of weeds felt horribly like falling into a frigid snake pit.
Finally, I hit the bottom. I tried to push myself up with trembling, numb hands, but the goo at the lake bottom held me down and sucked me deeper into the mud.
Then, I heard a strange voice inside my head say, ‘Andy, rest, for just a moment, you need to let go.’ I replied, ‘No, I can’t, I have to get to the surface for some air.’ Then the voice said again, ‘If you let go for just a moment, then I promise that you can return to the struggle.’ I responded, ‘Do you promise?’ And the voice answered back, ‘Yes, I promise.’
In my frozen panic, I said to myself, ‘All right then, OK then, I’ll stop for just a moment of rest.’
I stopped struggling. I let go. The very instant I let go, I was hurled into a dark, black tunnel. I looked back and saw my body stuck in the weeds at the bottom of the lake. I looked forward and saw a brilliant Light shining at the end of the tunnel.
Instantly, the freezing cold was gone. I felt warm. The horrible pain in my body was gone, and I felt peaceful, calm, and very, very happy. The ringing in my ears and head was gone, replaced by a gentle silence, as if I was in the middle of a redwood forest with a gentle breeze blowing through the tops of the trees. The radiant Light that looked like a thousand exploding suns overtook the blackness. My retinas should have been burned out by its brightness, but I could stare into the Light and it didn’t hurt. Again, I realized that all of the pain that consumed me an instant ago was completely gone. Warmth, joy, and an indescribable feeling of love replaced the cold, terror, panic, and fear that enveloped me.
For some unknown reason, this dramatic rush toward the Light caused me no concern. I had no fear of the Light. I was pulled closer and closer, as if I was drawn into the Light by a gentle, giant magnet.
Then, in the next instant, I was suspended inside the center of an immense sphere, bigger than our high school gymnasium. The inside of the sphere looked like an enormous, unending movie screen, with hundreds of movies playing in every direction at the same time. I was completely surrounded by images of my experiences. Wherever I looked in the sphere, I saw all the events of my lives; and I could hear, feel, touch, and smell the exact experience of living those lives. In this place there was no beginning; there was no end. I observed all of the moments of my lives all at the same time, all around me. All my lifetimes were somehow mystically connected to each other. Strangely, I sensed no fear or judgments, no guilt or accountability, and absolutely no blame or shame. I re-experienced every thought, word, and action of each life experience whenever I focused on them. I was suspended in a world of unlimited dimensions.
Then after what seemed like hours in the sphere, I was instantly back in the tunnel again, drawn toward the Light. I could actually feel its brightness, warmth and love. As I got closer to the Light, I was absorbed by its brilliance and perfect love.
I was in the Light! Oh my God, I was actually in the Light. I was the Light!
I looked directly into the source of the Light and it appeared to me in a human-like form. It looked like a massive human silhouette that was radiating with the brightness of a thousand suns. Although I couldn’t remember seeing its form before, somehow I recognized it. The Light spoke to me: ‘Andy, do not be afraid. Andy, I love you. Andy, we love you.’
The Light: It actually knew me. The Light knew my name. The Light called me Andy. Surrounding the central Light form were millions and millions of other Lights welcoming me back home. I knew them all and they knew me; we are all pieces of the same Light. I heard myself say, ‘It’s good to be back home.’ We were all home together again.
Although I was in the Light, and the Light was in me, I was still Andy. I was everywhere and I was here at the same time. I saw me as a person and I saw me in the infinite warm and loving Light. I became the Light. The Light had a voice that I had never heard, but it was not strange to me. The Light had a smile that was indescribably beautiful, and I recognized that too. The Light had an incredible sense of humor and an infectious laugh, and we talked and laughed together. The Light had the answers to all of the questions in the universe and I didn’t have any questions, because I knew everything that the Light knew, and that was everything!
The Light also knew everything that I have ever done or will do, and the Light loved me without conditions. The Light loved me because of who I am - Andy, a piece of the Light. There was no fear. No judgment. No punishment. No blame. No shame. No ledger of good and bad deeds. Only warmth, peace, joy, happiness, forgiveness and love in the Light. I was one with the unconditionally loving Light. I was home. I was home forever.
Then I was startled! The Light said, ‘Andy, you must go back.’ I said, ‘No, I’m not going back, I’m not leaving. I’m never ever going back.’ The Light said for a second time, ‘Andy, you must go back.’ I repeated my first response, ‘No, I’m not going back ever.’ Just the thought of returning to my body back on earth was repulsive to me. It felt like I would be trying to force the universe in a tiny, brittle bottle. Then the Light said a third time, ‘Andy, you must go back.’ The next instant, without pause or delay of the smallest increment of time, I was back on Earth. I was stuffed back into a cold, shivering, aching body lying on the beach. I opened my eyes and tears rolled down my cheeks. The Light was gone. Oh my God, the Light was gone. I was so sad, so mournful. I was back in this tired, achy and nearly frozen body. How sad. How very, very sad I was.
I was lying on my stomach on the sand. One of my friends pushed the rest of the water out of my lungs. I coughed out the water, but the intense pain remained. This time the pain was different and permanent. It was the pain of being separated from the Light. I didn’t know why I was so sad. I didn’t even know what I had just experienced. But I do know that all of the warmth, beauty and love that was infused in my soul, I could no longer feel. The Light had played a devious trick on me. The Light allowed me to expand and become one with the universe, and then rammed me back into my frail, earthly body. At the time, it seemed like a very cruel experience to put me through. I was very angry at the Light.
All my classmates stood around me, glad that I’d been revived. Someone said, ‘Andy, you don’t seem very happy about being dragged from the bottom of the lake, are you still in a daze, or what? How was it? Were you afraid?’ I answered with a lie. I said that I couldn’t remember anything. I told them that the entire episode was a complete blank. I had to lie to my friends, I had to lie to my family, and I had to lie to myself. I couldn’t tell anyone about the Light. How could I expect them to understand what I just experienced if I didn’t understand any of it myself?
I told myself that maybe it was just a hallucination or some bizarre connection of synapses inside my brain from the lack of oxygen, or something else like that. I wondered if I was just plain crazy and thought ‘Oh well, I’ll probably forget all about it in a little while.’
It has been many, many years since my drowning and death, and I have forgotten thousands of experiences. Thousands of other experiences have faded and dimmed with the passing of time. Many traumatic memories have been embellished or partially forgotten. I have only one life and death experience that has remained clear and unchanged over my lifetime and this was it. The moment that I entered the Light and became one with the Light, was a moment that has no parallel in my life. It was a feeling of inexpressible unconditional love, peace and joy. It was a love that I cannot adequately describe with words; it was a love that can only be experienced. I experienced it. I was in the Light, the Light was in me, and we were all One.
A number of years ago a series of strange early morning occurrences began to happen to me. I would wake up around 2:00 AM, fully awake and there would be phrases and images spinning around in my head. There was nothing I could do to make those images go away and allow me to go back to sleep. I had an uncontrolled impulse to write. I am not a writer. I am very visual. I would find myself alone, in the middle of the night, writing simple poetry that just flowed from my pencil point. After an hour or so, I would get very tired and go back to sleep. I would get up, read the poem I wrote a few hours earlier, and be very surprised that something like that could come from me. Then I realized that the poems were not coming from me but through me. They were coming from the Light, and all I was doing was transcribing my experiences with the Light into beautiful poetry.
The poem that follows, ‘Death By Drowning and Back Again,’ is a poem that describes my near death experience through the beauty of poetry.
Death by Drowning and Back Again
Oh God, I’m drowning! My life was all black!
Why me? Why me, God? Please, can’t I go back?
I sank into an abyss of ice-cold pain,
Surrounded by blackness again and again …
Though my senses were numb, my pain was intense!
I screamed out in silence … death seemed so immense!
Every fiber of my body continued to fight …
The ugly, frigid, blackness was void of any light.
I continued to sink and struggle without end.
Until finally, I hit bottom … alone without friend.
Stuck in the mud and try as I might …
Escape was impossible from this black, hideous sight.
A voice from my depths, tells me what’s best.
‘Let go … for just a moment, you need a little rest.’
I’m afraid to stop trying … for one breath of air!
To rise from the bottom … break free from despair!
Again, the voice assures me … ‘Let go, it’s all right …’
‘After a brief moment, you can continue the fight.’
All right then – OK then – I’ll let go of my life.
A moment of rest, and then on with the strife.
I release! I let go! Then in an instant so fine …
I’m hurled from my body through a tunnel in time.
I look down and see my body all knurled up in fright!
I look up, and the tunnel was aglow in white Light.
In a heartbeat, a gasp, my senses are alive!
I am warm, I am loved, I am happy … completely revived!
The Light was so bright; it should burn through my eyes,
But it pulls like a gentle magnet, and then I realize
I’m engulfed in the Brightness, with love and with care.
The Light, It sustains me … I can breathe its warm, sweet air.
And then in a moment I appear in a sphere.
My lives are all around me, I can see them, I can hear …
Every moment, every thought through lifetimes unfold …
There was no judgment or fear to behold,
No accounting, no damnation, just observations so clear …
That my lives are just choices and it was love that endears.
‘Don’t be afraid,’ the Light says through my ears,
‘I love you, we love you, and there’s nothing to fear.’
I’m welcomed by the Light … and the Light smiles within me!
We talk, we play, we laugh … Its Love sets me free!
At last I am Home! The universe was such a wondrous delight!
The Light was One with Me … and I am One in the Light!
Surprisingly, the Light says, ‘Andy you must go back!’
‘No, I‘m finally Home!’ I screamed in a counter attack.
The Light insisted, ‘Back to earth you must go.’
Earthly images terrorized me and tears started to flow.
In an instant I was back, coughing up water on the sand…
The agony of earth overshadowed a Light so wonderfully grand.
Date NDE Occurred: June 15, 1955
Experience Description 2335
It was the summer of 1955 and a few days before my graduation at High School in Michigan that I experienced an unusual, frightening and incredible event. It have always remembered it. The memory of that event is not only crystal clear, but it remains intact, exactly as it happened, to this moment. Every thought, every word, every image, every action and every feeling is unchanged, and it abides in my memory unchanged. I have spent years trying to forget, but always remember, and always remember it as if it were today. I’ve never experienced any other incident with the clarity, exactness or emotional impact as my drowning and my death.
My classmates and I were so happy because the end was in sight. In a few days, we would finally graduate from high school and get on with our lives. I had a scholarship to an engineering university in Northern Michigan. I was filled with joy and excitement. June was exceptionally warm that year and our class decided to have a picnic at a nearby lake. It was our final class gathering before graduation, and most of us were keen to go.
My mother didn’t want me to go. She said that the water was still too cold and she specifically didn’t want me to go swimming. As I was one of the class officers, I knew that I had to go and that I had to go swimming with my friends. So, I hid my swimming trunks in my lunch bag and I went off for a good time.
We arrived at the lake and it truly was a great day for a beach picnic. The sun was shining, the sky was a beautiful shade of blue, pretty cotton cloud balls dotted the sky, and there was a slight breeze blowing. Everyone changed into their swimming suits and we began the party with some beach games prior to lunch. We ate, and then after lunch some of my friends swam out to a floating dock about one hundred yards off shore. Once they got to the dock, they began waving and yelling for me to join them. I walked down to the water and stepped in, ankle deep and immediately jumped back out. It was really cold! Way too cold for me! I like to swim in warm, almost bathtub temperature water. But they kept on waving and yelling at me. They really wanted me to swim out. Everyone was watching. I had to go. The water was much too cold for me to ease in slowly, so I ran into the water from about twenty feet off shore, and with a big, blood-curdling scream, I hit the water with a gigantic belly flop. Wow! This water really was cold! I knew I’d better start swimming as fast as possible to get warm, and I did. I was starting to warm up as I got into my swimming rhythm.
Then about half way to the dock, I began to feel cramping pains in my stomach and groin. I could hear my mother’s voice, ‘Andy, don’t go into the water right after you eat, you might get cramps.’ But the cramps weren’t that bad, and besides I was over half way there already. I could make it. Now with every stroke the pain increased. It was getting harder and harder for me to kick my legs.
I couldn't kick my legs any more. The pain was really intense. I couldn’t keep my body straight. My knees were buckling up into my stomach. I was scared! My arms were moving, but I was not going anywhere .I was starting to bob up and down. Oh hell, I was swallowing too much water. It was in my nose, down my windpipe and in my lungs. I was going under. I was under! I had to get to the surface for some air. Why was it taking me so long to get my head out of the water? I was stroking as hard as I could. I needed to break through to the surface for some air, and I needed it now!
Finally, my head broke the surface of the water! I was coughing, choking and trying to scream for help, but no sound came out. I needed to breathe now, but I was sucking in more water than air and my lungs were filling up with water. They felt like they were going to burst. Frantically, I looked across the surface of the water for the raft. There it was, but it was still quite far away. I would never make it! Hey, why was everybody just standing around? No, wait, a couple of guys were waving at me. Didn’t they realize that I was drowning! There I finally admitted it; I was drowning! I was going to die!
No one was coming to help me! I couldn’t keep my head above the water! Down I went again, this time deeper than before! Hell, I had to get more air! I had to get my head out of this damn water! Why couldn’t I move my arms? Oh God, they felt like lead pipes, it was so hard to move them, and I sank like a rock. The pain, the excruciating pain was in my chest and arms now! I never thought there could be pain like this. I needed air! I needed air! I had to get my head out of the water!
Oh God, I was sinking deeper and deeper. I couldn’t move my arms any more. The pain was unbearable; every muscle in my body was screaming out with pain. Pain! Pain! And more pain! I couldn’t stand it any more! I was still sinking and it was getting darker and darker. Now it was black. I couldn’t see anything! Oh my God, I couldn’t see! Was I blind?
There was pain in my ears. It felt like someone was sticking an ice pick in them! The ringing was deafening. It felt like my brain was going to explode! I was still falling into this black hole, and it was freezing down there. My whole body was trembling with freezing cold, with freezing pain. Oh God, where in the hell was I going?
I was still slowly sinking into this freezing black hole. It lasted forever. Then I felt something. They were slimy and cold! They must have been the weeds at the bottom of the lake. I was getting tangled in the weeds. I was struggling with the weeds. God they felt horrible, and it was like I’d fallen into a freezing snake pit! I was still dropping down!
I stopped sinking! I was at the bottom. I reached down with my frozen hands to try to push myself up, but they were being sucked into the mud and goo of the lake bottom. My hands were stuck in the mud and I couldn’t get them out. Oh God, help me! I was terrified! I was in a state of complete panic! Ice cold, black, unbearable panic! I was tired, so very, very tired! Every muscle, every cell of my body was filled with excruciating pain! It was unbearable, truly unbearable! But I had to continue to struggle. I had to stay alive. I was so afraid to die! 'God please help me! Please help me now!' I didn’t want to die!
I had to get out of the water. I needed air. Oh God, how I needed a breath of air! Please God, just one breath, that’s all I asked for. I couldn’t stand the pain, the fear, the cold, the ringing and the blackness. I couldn’t die! ‘Try Andy, damn it, try! You can’t give up! You can’t give up now!' But I was so tired, so sore, there was so much blackness, so much ice-cold pain. I needed a rest! Just for a minute! I needed to stop struggling for just a minute.
Then almost magically, I heard myself say, ‘OK, Andy, you can rest, if you promise to return to the struggle. You can’t die now. Do you promise?’ I responded to myself, ‘Yes, I promise.’ I was a chunk of black, frozen, excruciating, panic and terror. I stopped struggling. I let go.
The second, the very instant, the exact moment that I let go; I was hurled into a black tunnel. ‘What in hell is happening?’ I screamed to myself! The freezing cold was gone! I was WARM! The pain was gone! I felt WONDERFUL! The ringing in my ears and head had gone! I could HEAR THE SILENCE! The blackness was gone! I could SEE A LIGHT!
I looked back and I could see my body in the weeds at the bottom of the lake! ‘Was that really my body? How could I see it through the blackness?’ I looked up and I could see a Light! It was bright, so very bright. It looked like a thousand suns all exploding at the same time! I was staring into the Light, but it didn’t hurt my eyes! No pain. There was no more pain! There was no more terror, no more panic, no more fear. I felt warm and I felt loved. Is this crazy or what?
I was rushing toward the Light, and for some unknown reason I had no fear, and I loved the Light. Oh what a wonderful, beautiful, enchanting, warm and loving Light. I was getting closer and closer, it was as if I was being drawn into the Light by a gentle, giant magnet. Closer and closer.
‘What now? Where was I?’ I was inside an immense sphere! And the inside of the sphere was like an enormous, unending movie screen. Everything was going on at once, all around me, left, right, up and down. Wherever I looked I saw my life. I couldn’t only see it, but I could also hear, feel and experience every event in all of my lives - past, present and future. There is no beginning! There is no end! I could observe all of the moments of my lives all at the same time, all around me. Strangely, there was no fear or judgments; it was just my life’s experiences as they were occurring. What incredible feelings. I could relive every thought, word and action whenever I focused on any one of them. What a wonderful, fantastic, incredible experience being in the Eternal Now!
Now I was back in the tunnel again, speeding toward the Light! I could actually feel the brightness, the warmth, the love. Oh God, what a truly wondrous feeling! I was getting closer and closer to the Light. It was so very bright, so very warm and so very loving. I was getting closer and closer.
I was in the Light! I was actually in the Light. I was the Light! I saw the Light and now it appeared it had a human like form. I’ve never seen it before, but somehow I recognized it. The Light spoke to me. The Light said ‘Andy, do not be afraid.’ Then the Light said, ‘Andy, I love you. Andy, we love you.’ Oh God, It knows me! The Light knows my name! I couldn’t believe it! The Light actually knows me! The Light called me ‘Andy!’
I was in the Light. The Light was in me. I could see me in the unending Light. Nevertheless, I was still Andy. I was everywhere and I was here. I could see me as a person and I could see me in the infinite, warm, and loving Light. I became the Light. The Light was a form that I had never seen, but it was not new to me. Somehow, I knew it. The Light had a voice that I had never heard, but it was not strange to me. The Light had a smile that was indescribably beautiful, and I recognized it. The Light had an infectious laugh, and we laughed together. The Light had all of the answers in the universe and I didn’t have any questions, because I knew everything that the Light knew.
The Light knew everything that I had ever done or will do, and the Light loves me because I’m Andy. The Light loves me because of who I am! No fear! No judgments! No punishment! Just warmth! Just love! Just joy! Just happiness! Just this loving, ever loving Light! I was home! I felt the unbelievable warmth, love, joy and completeness of the Light! It was so very, very wonderful being in the Light. I was truly home! I was home forever!
Then the Light said, ‘Andy, you must go back!’ And I said to the Light, ‘No, I’m not going back, I’m not leaving. I’m never ever going back!’ The Light said for a second time, ‘Andy, you must go back.’ I repeated my first response, ‘No, I’m not going back ever!’ Then the Light said the third time, ‘Andy, you must go back!’ The next instant, the very next moment, without any pause or delay of even the smallest amount of time, I was back! I opened my eyes and tears were rolling down my cheeks. The Light had gone! Oh God, the Light had gone! I was back on the beach. I was so sad. I couldn’t describe the mournfulness. The Light was gone. I was back on the beach. How sad. How very, very sad I was.
I was lying on my stomach, on top of the sand, with one of my friends pushing the water out of my lungs. I was coughing out the water, but the pain returned. This time the pain was different. This time the pain never went away. It was the pain of not being in the Light.
How could I explain the Light to my family and friends? They would have thought that I was crazy. I’d have been sent away to the room with rubber walls! No! There was no way in the world I could ever tell anyone about the Light! I truly must be crazy!
Everyone was standing around me in a big circle. They were all glad that I was still alive. One of my friends said, ‘Andy, you don’t seem very happy about being dragged from the bottom of the lake, were you still in a daze, or what? How was it? Were you afraid?’ I answered with a lie. I said that I couldn’t remember anything. I told them that the entire episode was a complete blank. I had to lie to my friends, I had to lie to my family, and I had to lie to myself. I couldn’t tell anyone about the Light. They would never understand. Even I don’t understand.
After a few minutes, I told my friends that I had to go back into the water for a swim. I told them that I didn’t want to be afraid of the water for the rest of my life. So I jumped back into the cold water and swam out a little way and then returned. Everyone thought that I was so brave. The truth was I was so sad. Maybe it was just a dream or something like that. Maybe I was crazy.
I thought, Oh well, I’ll probably forget all about it in a few days.
Oh well, I’ll probably forget all about it in a few months.
Oh well, I’ll probably forget all about it in a few years.
Oh well, I’ll probably forget all about it in a few decades.
It has been over forty years since my ‘death’, and I have forgotten thousands of experiences. Thousands have faded and dimmed with the passing of time. Many traumatic ones have been embellished or misremembered. I had only one life and death experience that has remained clear and unchanged over time and this was it. The moment that I entered the Light, to become one with the Light, was a moment that has no parallel in my life! It was a true experience of inexpressible love. It was a love that could never be adequately described with words. A love that could only be experienced, the ever-loving Light. I was in the Light, I was the Light, and the Light was God.
Date NDE Occurred: 'June 15, 1955'
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident Drowned Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) I drowned swimming out to a floating platform during my high school senior year class picnic.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal There is no way to compare my consciousness when I was in the Light with my consciousness here on planet Earth. It's like asking someone to compare the difference between the light from a thousand suns exploding at the same time and the light from a matchstick. Yes, they are both light, but beyond that, there is no comparison. I can only say that I was in a complete state of love and knowing. The love of a billion homecomings all rolled up into one instant, and the knowing of every aspect of the complete universe, to become one with God. I had all of my earthly senses heightened a million times.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? At the moment when the Light smiled at me and said to me, 'Andy, don't be afraid, Andy I love you, Andy we love you.'
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning While I was in the Light, I had no sense of 'time' as I know it here on Earth. In other words, there is no sense of the serial nature of time - past, present or future. All times (past, present and future) were experienced at every moment in 'time' while I was in the Light.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did your vision differ in any way from normal? Since I have had vision only out of my left eye since birth, I never experienced true binocular vision on Earth. But in the Light I not only had perfect vision from both eyes, but there was no pain or discomfort looking into the Light brighter than that of a thousand suns. That truly amazed me!
Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? My hearing experience went from the driving, painful ringing just before I left my body to the wonderful sound of silence and pure loving; graceful silence. When I was in the Eternal Now Sphere, I could hear every event from my lifetimes clearer than when they actually occurred to me on Earth and other places.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes As soon as I 'let go', I left my body and started moving up into a deep dark tunnel. I could see my body stuck back in the mud and then I saw the bright light at the end of the tunnel. I was moving fast in the tunnel because I could feel the wind on my face and body.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes The Light was also surrounded by countless billions of other lights who knew me and who I knew. Not people from my lifetime (at the time of my drowning) but people (souls) from countless other lifetimes and from being in the absolute.
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Darkness
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I saw the Light immediately, and it was so bright I immediately wondered why it wasn't burning out my retinas. I was always in the Light, even when I went into the Eternal Now Sphere, and the closer I got to the Light the brighter it got, until I saw the form and face of the Light that loved me unconditionally. I saw the Light and communicated with the Light through all my senses. We talked, laughed and loved one another like long, lost friends.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm Yes, being in the Light with billions of other Lights all around is the most beautiful and distinctive location in the entire universe.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Warmth (warm because I was freezing to death stuck in the mud at the bottom of the lake) and unconditional love to a degree I never even dreamed about here on Earth. It was an amazing feeling of being back home, after a long time away, being back home where I belonged. What a truly glorious feeling.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special Knowledge
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
The experience included: Life review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I was in a sphere surrounded (360 degrees) with all of my life times. They were all occurring at the same time, sort of 'blending' into one another. Not in a serial sequence, but happening all around me (right, left, up and down) just everywhere in that sphere. Yes, I learned that I have experienced many life times in many places and that there is no 'death'. There is no 'judgment'; there is no 'punishment', there is no 'fear.' There are only event and experiences that 'work for me' or 'don't work for me.' There are things that I want to repeat, because they give me and others joy and things that I don't want to repeat, because they don't create joy.
The experience included: Vision of the future
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I saw the entire universe and all events, but did not retain any memory of any future events about my life here on Earth. I knew that I came from another planet that was at a higher level of consciousness then we have here on Earth.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Conservative/fundamentalist Strict Roman Catholic
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes They all have. I am no longer 'religious'. I am a 'spiritual being' who believes that we are all one in the Light with God.
What is your religion now? Liberal No religious affiliation
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes They all have. I am no longer 'religious'. I am a 'spiritual being' who believes that we are all one in the Light with God.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I had a complete knowledge of the entire universe. Therefore, I knew the Light (God in Earth terms), because I became one with the Light, but at the same time retained my 'Andy-ness' and individuality. I asked no questions because I knew all the answers. There wasn't anything I didn't know while I was immersed in the Light.
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes Yes, I was contained in the Light, absorb
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes My whole life has changed. I don't fear death. I am waiting to return to the Light soon!
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I have an awareness of people that I knew in another life time the moment that I meet or see them. It occurs more and more frequently as I get older.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The fact that I was absorbed into the Light to become one with the Light and still retained my 'Andy' consciousness! Now that's a heavy experience. To realize that you are one with Light/God, actually an individual piece of God. Therefore, I am God, as we all are here on planet Earth.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes But I never spoke of it to anyone for over 20 years. I was afraid that I was crazy. I didn't speak of it until I read my first book on NDEs by Moody in the mid-1970s.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definately not real I had nothing to compare it to, and since I was deeply Roman Catholic and did not recognize one entity from the Roman Catholic teachings in the Light (not Jesus, Mary, Joseph, Moses, no one like that) I thought that I was crazy. I had no one to talk to about it!
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. I know that it happened to me and that it is real. After 50 years, the events of my drowning, death and return are as clear today as they were when I was laying on the beach with the water being pumped out of my lungs. I can still feel the warmth, unconditional love and complete absorption from and by the Light. I know it is true from the very fiber and cellular level of my earthly body!
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Meditation often brings back many of the feelings and emotions that I experienced in the Light.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I don't know why I came back, but I do know that I am grateful for being able to remember being in the Light.